100 Ways to Annoy Somebody With Asperger's Syndrome

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293. Start counting backwards.

294. On her birthday, take your autistic child to a restaurant renowned for playing loud sirens and having the staff loudly sing happy birthday. Refuse to understand while she freaks out every time this happens and keep doing it. She must totally love being the center of attention as well as the sheer amount of noise generated in her honor. (okay, they didn't know I was autistic, but they did know I hated this place)

this is close to #1 way to annoy katzefrau.


295. interpret their efforts to obtain information as a confrontation, questions as an accusations (therefore not answering them), or an informational correction as a criticism

296. don't check the spelling on their name - just go ahead and write it how it sounds

297. leave your TV on (even or especially with the volume down)

298. neglect to shut off your car alarm immediately when it goes off

299. say "i think --" or "probably" when you are relaying confirmed information, expecting that they will understand to ignore the maybe or probably

300. turn on the overhead light

i think there are 1000 ways to annoy someone with asperger's. and this is my current favorite topic, even if it does skip numbers and go past 100.

301. create your website with bright contrasting colors

302. put scrolling ads on it

303. make information in it impossible to find easily

304. post three times in a row

305) Recommend ASpar Stories to someone when they ask what it's like having aspie parents

n. Hover.

n+1. Assign him or her a task without clear guidelines.

n+2. Assign a task without clear guidelines and make her or her do it in a GROUP.

n+3. `Do something impractical, like make a tiny grilled cheese in a huge wok and then make it take up 3/4 of the dishwasher rather than take 2 seconds to wipe it out (I love my roommate, but...)

n+4. Say, "suck it up, buttercup" when the going gets tough.

311.) Fail to realise that if I am not looking directly at you for longer than a nanosecond, you are probably making me uncomfortable and should go away.

312.) Don't accept that not everyone needs to talk ALL OF THE TIME. My silence may in fact mean that I am stuck for a way to end the one-sided monologue that is our "conversation."

*Edited one time because though I like numbers, they aren't a strength.

whatever number we're at: When they call you on the phone, say: - "ah, you're still alive?"
yeah...

314 ) After saying something patronising to humiliate them in the company of others,go on to insist "I'm only trying to help you"

315. (approx.) Say "I do try to make allowances for your problems, I really do" to them, then continue not bothering to understand or adapt in any way.

316. When interviewing them for a job,stop mid-sentence and say "There's something strange about you but I can't put my finger on what it is"

317. Close the exercise room for 'maintenance' right when I want to use it and then not actually have anything fixed when I come back days later.

318. Assume that he/she would LOVE to go on a spontaneous trip with you.

319. Insist that today's careers require people who are "team players", "work with others", "work in groups", etc, put the idea into every job description, and indoctrinate students with it.

320. Install industrial-grade fire alarms in EVERY room of EVERY unit of an apartment complex and test them randomly.

321) Go on and on about all the oodles of intimate friends you have and how your life would be meaningless without them, then look at the Aspie as if to say "now it's your turn" even though you know they don't have these kind of relationships.

322) Ask "How are you?" and when the Aspie dutifully answers in perfect NT lingo, "Fine", give them a look of suspicious confusion and say, "Yeah??" or "Oh??"

323) Ask them to do something you know they despise, like go shopping for clothes at a mall, or even worse, go to a hairdresser to get a new hairdo and when the Aspie says "no thanks" reply by saying, "Come on! It will be good for you!"

These were probably mentioned, but I couldn't read through all of those posts:

324. Ignore them when they're trying to give you helpful information because you'd rather be helped by someone lacking in logic and experience, just like them.

325. Tell them they should talk more then get mad and tell them to shut up once they do.

326. When told about their "condition", treat them as if they don't exist or matter since they have no feelings anyway...because you know, if you don't show it you don't have it...

327. Touch or hug them without notice.

328. Put them in a dorm with 3 other females. Who are loud.

329. Give vague instructions and in class, don't clearly state anything!

330. Ask why they don't have a boyfriend and/or why they've never had one

331. Then go on to mention what guys want in a girl without clarifying that you're jokingly mentioning shallow traits..

332. After they're say something or rationally express an opinion, tell them they need Jesus.

333. Talk, laugh, do everything loudly everywhere you go and without consideration for others who may need quiet to focus.

334) Say "Yes" when you mean "No"

335) Know that the person has AS but they haven't figured it out yet or been told and don't tell them yourself but keep acting like you are their friend who really cares about them even when you see them having all kinds of problems associated with undiagnosed AS

336) Treat them like an exotic animal pet so you can brag to your friends behind their back to show how "enlightend" and "tolerant" you are.

337. Whistle happy songs and be upbeat and chatty first thing in the morning - although this would admittedly be irritating for anyone who hasn't had a lobotomy.