You Might be an Aspie if...

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My daughter thinks I'm deaf: she's 34 now, and she's known me all her life, but I don't nod, make eye contact when she's talking (always: I do good eye contact when I'm thinking about it, with people I don't know so well) and do visible facial reactions to things she says, or think it's necessary to look at her when I'm hearing her. I can't convince her that I heard her unless I repeat it back word for word. We got a hearing test for me, and I've lost a little in the upper ranges, like everybody my age, but she still thinks I'm deaf.

So, just to keep the post on topic:
You might be an Aspie if people think you're deaf when you aren't, or maybe, not listening when you are.

That happened to me, back in 1988.
Our tutor (Dutch language class; I´m Dutch,) wrongly explained to us the use of the dative case of the third plural personal pronoun (hun/hen). Nowadays the inflections are used a bit less rigidly. She assumed that the hypercorrect way was correct (many people do that) , so I corrected her. All she could do was to stop talking and look at me with fierce eyes. That was the last time I would correct a tutor in public.

You might be an aspie if...

... you have learned how to speak a foreign language fluently, but never had the opportunity to use it on a (native) speaker.

This fits me perfectly, it's one of the only subjects that I will actually take the lead in talking about. I don't think she's interested but sometimes she asks something about it if I'm reading a book just so that I talk.

EDIT: I forgot to add something.

You might be an Aspie if you know more about a PLANET from Star Wars than you do about your best friend.

Which translation?

Same here. I was told that I was two and a half. Mom was tutoring grade school kids who were having trouble with reading, and I eavesdropped while I was playing, and then surprised her by saying the right word for the right flash card.

You might be an Aspie if....

you have an extensive wardrobe, but only ever wear two of your outfits, and you wash them once a week.

you spend more time calculating how much you would need to mark up items that you will never buy for a pet store you will never own, taking into consideration supply and demand, rent, and all the other costs, than you do talking to your boyfriend.

While you are busy on the computer, looking up information on your newest obsession, you shake an empty soda can 10 times before getting up to get a new can, then come back to find a full, warm can on the other side of the computer.

Your Movie collection is alphabetized, your books are alphabetized and sorted by height, yet every dish in your house is stacked in the sink.

You might be an Aspie if:

You have figured out the entire movie you are watching by the third scene, and can't help but point out every big move before it happens, likely not met with amusement by those around you.

You meight be an Aspie if:

Few things meet the quality standards you find essential.

You meight be an Aspie if:

Typical blue collar comedy is too obvious to be funny.

You might be an Aspie if:

You think Reno 911 TV is flippen Hillarious!

You Might Be an Aspie if:

You find a knock to the humerus too extreme to be funny.

You Might be an Aspie if

You find the feeling of pinching your ulnar nerve between your ulna bone and the tissue between your ulnar nerve and an impact point with a hard surface, too extreme to be funny.

You might be an Aspie if

You have to correct a joke that you have already told even if it will ruin the joke.

You might be an Aspie if, you go around making strange motor gestures with your fingers..

It's both:
http://education.yahoo.com/reference/di ... ry/octopus

Very unaspergically ignoring your final typo-- it's obviously a typo, because you spelled "octopuses" the first time.

YMBAAI
You operate on the internal mandate that no error may ever go uncorrected, and as you live and learn, you clamp an iron hand on your impulses and compulsions to correct, for the logical reason that you want to get along better with NTs.

You might be an Aspie if you spent the entire Christmas Dinner Party at your grandparents house sitting in their lounge room reading the Silmarillion because there were too many people in the other rooms for you to go into them.

That happened to me.

You might be an Aspie if you tend to force your company on somebody you like while simultaneously screaming in the inside at having to socialize at all O_O

YMBAAI when family members came to your birthday party as a child, you sat in a room by yourself rather than with them.

YMBAAI you also did the above when you were dragged along to other family members birthday parties.

YMBAAI you haven't actually talked to the majority of your family in years because they finally stopped forcing you to attend these parties and as a result you have no contact with them.

Well, "Actually"...

I think whoever was being quoted is confusing the Ark of The Covenant, which was placed in the Tabernacle, with Noah's Ark, and possibly with Moses' little "ark basket boat", but there were several hundred years (of Bible Chronology: actually, I suspect that Noah's Ark was a metaphorical story or myth) between each two of the three of them. Why the word "Ark" was used for all three, I don't know. Two were boats, and one was a beautiful gold-"plated" box.

Gen 6:
14 ¶ Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch.
15 And this [is the fashion] which thou shalt make it [of]: The length of the ark [shall be] three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.
16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; [with] lower, second, and third [stories] shalt thou make it.

The above was Noah's, nothing said or implied about rectangular, but it's clear from the context that it was intended to be a boat.

Exd 2:
2 And the woman conceived, and bare a son: and when she saw him that he [was a] goodly [child], she hid him three months.
3 And when she could not longer hide him, she took for him an ark of bulrushes, and daubed it with slime and with pitch, and put the child therein; and she laid [it] in the flags by the river's brink.
4 And his sister stood afar off, to wit what would be done to him.
5 ¶ And the daughter of Pharaoh came down to wash [herself] at the river; and her maidens walked along by the river's side; and when she saw the ark among the flags, she sent her maid to fetch it.
6 And when she had opened [it], she saw the child: and, behold, the babe wept. And she had compassion on him, and said, This [is one] of the Hebrews' children.

And this one was a caulked basket boat.

The one below, the sacred object which was basically a box.

Exodus 25:
10 ¶ And they shall make an ark [of] shittim wood: two cubits and a half [shall be] the length thereof, and a cubit and a half the breadth thereof, and a cubit and a half the height thereof.
11 And thou shalt overlay it with pure gold, within and without shalt thou overlay it, and shalt make upon it a crown of gold round about.
12 And thou shalt cast four rings of gold for it, and put [them] in the four corners thereof; and two rings [shall be] in the one side of it, and two rings in the other side of it.
13 And thou shalt make staves [of] shittim wood, and overlay them with gold.
14 And thou shalt put the staves into the rings by the sides of the ark, that the ark may be borne with them.
15 The staves shall be in the rings of the ark: they shall not be taken from it.
16 And thou shalt put into the ark the testimony which I shall give thee.
17 And thou shalt make a mercy seat [of] pure gold: two cubits and a half [shall be] the length thereof, and a cubit and a half the breadth thereof.
18 And thou shalt make two cherubims [of] gold, [of] beaten work shalt thou make them, in the two ends of the mercy seat.
19 And make one cherub on the one end, and the other cherub on the other end: [even] of the mercy seat shall ye make the cherubims on the two ends thereof.20 And the cherubims shall stretch forth [their] wings on high, covering the mercy seat with their wings, and their faces [shall look] one to another; toward the mercy seat shall the faces of the cherubims be.
21 And thou shalt put the mercy seat above upon the ark; and in the ark thou shalt put the testimony that I shall give thee.