What stresses you out the most about your autism?

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Not being able to decipher 'hunger'. Because I can't figure out hunger I 'forget' to eat. And seeing my Mum's baffled face as she asks 'HOW CAN YOU FORGET TO EAT?!' and not being able to explain to her that I'm trying to learn how to figure out this stuff, and it's a case of 'If I could, I would, but I can't so I won't'.

It takes me a long to time to do stuff, and some times I won't do something because of some sensory issue. But If I say to someone 'I can't do it I don't like the noise'. They'll say 'WE ALL HATE THE NOISE! YOU'RE NO DIFFERENT THAN ANYONE ELSE'
and then they'll wonder why I go into hysterics about it.

I hate hearing that statement with a purple passion.

I go through this too. I'll be standing there saying, "I just had that in my hand two seconds ago. Where on earth could it have gone?" And I find things in the strangest, most illogical places, and when I find them, it's then that the memory comes to mind of me putting it there, not before when I needed to be remembering it. It's very annoying and I waste much time looking for things I just had in my hand a few minutes ago.

That sounds like me. The thing is, I've only recently begun to really understand that most people do connect with each other. I mean, I was always kind of aware that people connected with each other, but I didn't really put the pieces together and figure out that that was "normal". I guess I just assumed that other people are often as detached as me, and I just happened to be witnessing their "connected" moments. I don't know if that makes sense.

As for the original post, Age, I wish there was some way you could replace the head banging with something else. It sounds painful and not real good for your noggin.

There is no reason to assume that if people don't think in pictures they think in words. I think in neither, in fact I have no qualitive experience/feedback of thought at all. My thoughts are to totally remote, blind, 'black box' and I can't tell you how it works. This kind of way of thinking is extremely rare, I've not encountered anyone the same. When people talk about the way they think their are usual talking about higher level abstractions like pictures, patterns, words. But on a very basic level I do not form any form of image or mark (including text) in my head, I do not see or hear anything. My thoughts just are.

One myth is there is something remarkable about thinking in pictures. In fact is pretty common. Most people actually think in a range of things, but the ability to form photographic quality picture is pretty much standard not unique to ASD. Just ask people. What might be different is that some people use picture to think of abstract intangible things. So less literal and more gestalt.

I have no clue how to accomplish a smile on command. Mine look fake, or silly, so I don't do them. I do a real good smile when I am also happy, or laughing, and I am not trying to smile, but just smiling when someone greets me, unless I am also happy to see them, just doesn't happen.

Well, I made this assumption because until now, I had never encountered, or read about anything else. Temple Grandin in "Animals in Translation" said that Autistic people think in pictures, but "Normal" people think in words.

Your way of thinking reminds me of my intuition's "Inner knowing" feature, which is neither verbal, nor imagery, and processes things so quickly that it feels like acquiring huge amounts of information instantly. I can't tell you how I know, I just know. And I have great faith in things that come to me this way.

And yes I can and do think in words, but understanding depends upon my ability to translate those words into imagery, and feeling, and in my thinking image encompases more than just visual. I consider auditory and tactile memories to also be forms of image. I'm not really a visual learner, but learned things get stored as images and I suppose also inner knowing.

I suppose for me what has given me a great deal of stress would be that no matter how hard I sincerely attempt interaction in a social scenarios most often it ends in a unpleasant manner.No, I'm not saying all things of this nature tend to be negative yet, some of them have mainly as, often I'm not very good at either reading facial features as well, I'm not that good at being able to read between the lines in terms of verbal communication as such.Honestly, I try not to be like this other person with Asperger's whom I know has become intenselfy negative,pessimistic,sour etc.. I wish not to become like that but, I'll admit that sometimes it's not easy even in the online context I don't do any better however, atleast, I'm not winding up bothering,burdening,boring someone here on the net including WP.. Well, this does it for me at this moment..

not understanding when I'm being made fun of or not, being made fun of in general, and sometimes wishing I was more unaware of it. and people/teachers giving up on me and wanting me on medication thinking it'll fix me.

That's cool. Thing is like most people Temple Grandin are going to think most are going to think like her. Just because she says it doesn't make it so. She has a point about 'different' thinking. However describing a qualitative experience when you have nothing to compare it to is not easy. Like myself, didn’t automatically know that people thought differently from me. I learnt it from people talking about how they think in, which never occurred. I didn't understand what they meant by "think in". Also language is the biggest clue ‘visualise’, ‘imagine’, ‘picture’, etc. They make so sense to me, just not possible.

My bad executive function, I forget things most of the time, I can't organise my work or mess without comstant reminding, I can hardly get things started or finnish them off and I spend most of my time procrastinating. My poor organisation is extremely frustrating, I'm not just lazy.

Being emotionally behind and immature, if only there were a way to stop the tantrums!

Last but not least, not having a clue how to meet people or what to say to them.

Here's something I wrote in another thread.



Is this really that rare?

That's how I think. I get words and pictures, but a lot of what you describe here, too. I always assumed everyone does. I've never been able to describe it as well as you just have, though.

The most stressful part of my autism?

Probably procrastination and inability to just make myself "go do things" without extreme outside pressure. Feeling awkward and self-conscious about every little thing about me. Also fearing there's no one on the planet that I will ever completely relate to. I wish I could be more outgoing but I seriously don't know how.

I don't think my worst issues are purely due to autism though. It's co-morbid emotional issues. I'm just damn depressive and neurotic, empty, irritable, full of self-loathing anger. Existence itself stresses me out.

The little things in life stress me. Big things like marriage and children are far less stressful. Being surrounded by idiots at work is stressful.

The example you used here shows exactly the kind of thing that happens to me all the time. I'll go looking for something that I anticipate being in a certain spot. When I find that it's not there, it's like I fall completely apart. I get overwhelmed with frustration, which usually turns into a tangent, only for my spouse to point out what it is I'm looking for, only a few feet away. I absolutely hate that sort of thing. In that moment, just because it's not where I expected it to be, every problem solving ability I have (which isn't a whole lot by the way) goes out the window.