Can you do small talk well?

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All I can do is post this video:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyWsFfd9pqE[/youtube]

pretty smothley just say wats up hows it goin what ya been doin hows you sister / or brother doin are they at collage which one stuff like that it is easier if i am on my board and someone sees me with and they have one cuz then the small talk becomes skater small talk( alot more insterting) hey can i see your deck? yeah man? sweet a flip i use to have one mine's an element chad muska version ? oh that's sick man wanna have a game of skate dude? sure man then we play skate and it ends with hope to see ya round the skate park sometime . yeah man then we can rip it up again.

no. it pains me...except if I am exuberant about something, then I can get on a roll..then it isn't small talk anymore...
Whenever there is a situation where we are in public and I am expected to schmooze, I usually hide behind something in order to avoid it.

To some extent I'm able to do small talk but, this depends upon whom I'm around and the person whom, I happen to be in the company of at a specific time..Yes, small talk to this very day gives me problems but, I try to do with it as best as possible...

I can do smalltalk about the weather, incidents etc. What is difficult to me, is when people keep on asking me about the same things, like studies etc.
Or if they ask me a lot of questions in a row.
Especially when they ask a new question before I have answered the latter.
Or if they ask half questions in a row! Then I need to say: What would you like to know and could you say it clearly?
Or when they ask the same thing 2 times again beause they don't understand a short answer.
Or when I say I go home and they start asking me a row of questions about transport, what I shall do tomorrow, if I'm busy etc. To me, it's logically that I can't answer all that when say I am going home.

No! Terrible at small talk. I can tell that I make people uncomfortable at work, and that this one idiot made a comment that I had said the same thing about not getting enough sleep over and over again. But she didn't say it to me. She said it to someone else.

Now I just try to make my comments as banal as possible and move away quickly, except with a rare few people who will talk a lot and not expect me to say much. That I can deal with.

Not very good at it but I show flashes of promise sometimes.

To them it's just exhausting.

What I hate is when I'm in a situation where I am basically supposed to entertain someone who I have just met. Like when I'm at my mom or in laws house and I'm the only one there and a friend of theirs stops by. If they are coming back soon I'll invite them in to wait, but then there is that awkward silence. I offer them something to drink but without knowing anything about them, I don't know what to ask. I introduce myself of course, but sometimes I feel like it's their responsiblity to open the conversation considering they dropped by. But half the time they don't so I'll have to say something like "so how do you know <whoever>". Sometimes it's really awkward and we just sit there and nod for a second. Then are quiet. Obviously both trying to think of something to say. I've learned a trick for that though. I invite them in and offer a drink and tell them I'm right in the middle of something in another room and would they please excuse me. That seems to work well. Wish I had thought of it years ago.

PaganMom

My day to day talk seems to revolve around the questions:

What?

How?

Where?

When?

Why?

It mainly concerns tasks for the day, objects, animals and what other tasks people are doing.
I think that this is a kind of small talk.


Other people's small-talk seems to revolve around the questions:

Who?

You?

And seem to be more openly emotionally and socially charged.


It's like talking at cross purposes sometimes.
I want to get something done, or show someone something and they're just focussing on me and how I feel about doing it or how I feel about everything. It's nice when people care genuinely though. It's just that most people seem to be running on a warmer social/emotional setting than I am. They ask about subjective experience more often than I do. I usually report objective experiences, or if I feel something I try and link it to something concrete, or my physical surroundings.

Me: What's happening? How does it happen? Why does it happen? Where does it happen? When does it happen? And what am I supposed to do and who am I supposed to talk to if it happens?

Them: Who? You? Ooooh!

Last edited by AmberEyes on 24 Nov 2009, 8:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.

No

I can do small talks, but then after a while, it does start to get pretty boring me to me or I end up feeling awkard (mostly towards new people).

I normally end up going on and on and on that it could start becoming annoying... I don't really do that much with the NT's and also I find it hard to make a conversation with a NT I don't know.

I can deal with it as long as I have a script for it. If something comes up that's not part of the script, I'm stumped. As an example, recently someone said to me "What's happening?" and I had no scripted response, so nothing came out of my mouth, even though I know that "What's happening?" said in that context is equivalent to "What's up?", and I have a script for how to respond to "What's up?".

I'm an expert in "erm", "yeah", "right", "really", "uhm". I could do a thesis on it. I think it's my natural disposition.

I definetely relate to this statement. It took years to get over my anxiety of starting up a conversation, but now I don't have a problem. I wouldn't say I can do it well though. I'm pretty sure I'm still clearly umcomfortable to a NT. I do also tend to lose friendships over time.

Same here. I seem to be able (usually) to make a good first impression, but I can't maintain it. I simply have no common interests with the majority and though they may find me interesting or whatever at first, unfortunately they usually simply don't get me and I lack interest in pursuing a relationship. If I try to conform to their mannerisms it's too wearisome and I can't maintain it, so i stopped bothering to save their and my time.