What do you like about being autistic?
I like that I am not like most girls.
I'm the same way. When I tell somebody I'll do something, I always make a point to do it. It's just one of my values. And people say that autistics are uncaring.
I would get angry if I heard someone say that, some might be that is whith anyone really.
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Proud mother to Hannah and Joseph.
Up In the Clouds and Down in My Valley: My Richness and Yours
The above is a link to the closest I have ever gotten to being able to write about my favorite aspects of being autistic. The trouble being that the English language was not made by autistic people and can only vaguely point at some of our experiences.
I should point out that these are my experiences. They are not the experiences of every autistic person. Some also do have similar experiences.
I like living in the huge and interesting place beneath and before what most people call language, thought, movement, comprehension, perception, etc. Many people may imagine that as empty lifeless and barren but it is anything but.
In response to people who are grieved about what they are missing out on... a couple things. One is that many things autistic people miss out on have more to do with injustice than autism. The other... how do I explain. I have trouble remembering the last time I felt like my brain or other aspects of my physical configuration were making me miss out on something. And my guess is that as far as aspects of a normal life go I am probably missing out on more than most people here just because in addition to autism I have severe physical impairments and chronic health and pain issues.
The reason I don't think in terms of what I am missing is probably that I have noticed that... here's what I wrote awhile ago (in a post that partly got reworked into part of the article I linked above):
That means that any human being can be filled to the absolute saturation point with this richness and there will always be more there, and their experience of this richness is not diminished in the slightest by the fact that there is always so much more of it than they could ever understand.
So, leaving aside for a moment the fact that autistic people appear to directly perceive more of the world than non-autistic people do, how does being autistic change this? How does being disabled in general change this? Even if this somehow meant that we would not have certain particular experiences that particular people associate with “giving life meaning” or “giving life richness,” surely that richness is everywhere, and not just within particular experiences that particular people find joy in.
A full, rich, and rewarding life is not defined by tallying up the experiences valued by particular people in particular cultures in particular places, and is not defined by the cognitive or physical capacities of the person living it. The world has that richness embedded deeply into it, at an infinite level of complexity and simplicity and detail, and it can be found anywhere a person looks.
That's from a post called Life's Infinite Richness (that's a link) that I wrote in response to a guy who pitied me without even knowing me.
In response to some people talking about lacking social skills, one of the weird things is that social skills are the last thing to come to mind when I think about being autistic. I mean yes I am aware I have crappy social skills. But I see the social difficulties as like ... if i am at the center of one bubble and a nonautistic person is at the center of another bubble, the social problems come in when our bubbles touch out there on the surface. But that's peripheral, it's out there on the edges of things. It's not happening at the center, and it's not the center of being autistic for me either. Being autistic is how I think and perceive the world. That's the center. The social stuff is just this little side thing that's been exaggerated in importance because that's one of the things that bothers other people about us. And research is beginning to show that.
One thing I find terrible is that people are fed this notion of how life should work. And then we internalize it and then we freak out when our lives don't go that way. And then we begin to blame some aspect of ourselves for keeping us from fulfilling that ideal. Instead of questioning whether that is really the only way to have a good life.
I am a reasonably happy person living a life nobody prepared me for and that is really far from the norm we are told to aspire to. That in itself should say something.
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"In my world it's a place of patterns and feel. In my world it's a haven for what is real. It's my world, nobody can steal it, but people like me, we live in the shadows." -Donna Williams
Autism isn't where my strengths come from, overcoming aspects of it has made me stronger in ways, weaker in others, but in general I can not say that I do or do not owe credit to it, due to only finding out about it recently.
I would prefer to remain myself though, which is why I would not want to be "cured", as that is antithetical to my state of mind.
Also: I very much agree with your outlook on many things, anbuend, there is much wisdom there, and it is interesting that I suspect you would understand what I mean when I say I've always been amused by trees.
They spend their entire lives reaching for the stars, while being firmly rooted in the ground. Which has led me to treasure my vertical mobility.
What I like about it is that it forces me to think outside the box. Allt the things that I can't do force me to think of other things that I CAN do, and move in that direction instead, which would otherwise never have happened.
In a way I'm able to design my own existence, because I have to. I can't go with anything else, so I have to construct everything. And that makes for some interest, and some boredom, and some fear, possibly even in similar proportions to some other people's experiences, whose lives are more like those of their neighbours.
Ultimately everybody's working on the same quilt, and if everyone's life was the same pattern as everyone else's, it wouldn't be be so thrilling to look at.
fiddlerpianist
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Location: The Autistic Hinterlands
I don't know what specifically to attribute to my autistic cognitive style, but I do know that I see the world differently than most, and I cherish that. I also like sharing with others how I see the world and sharing the application of my talents with them. Sometimes they appreciate it and sometimes they don't, but at least I am not hiding myself. I can't control how others think of me, so I let people think what they will. Life goes on, regardless.
I'm also not sure where I got my unquenchable optimism from, but I suspect it's rooted in my relative naivete to much of the world. I'm grateful for that as well.
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"That leap of logic should have broken his legs." - Janissy
What I love about being autistic is having a photographic memory otherwise which can last me for a very long time.
But I can for some reason remember pictures or a movie, not words.
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BACK in London…. For now.
Follow my adventures on twitter: @superboyian
Please feel free to help my aspie friend become a pilot: https://gofund.me/a9ae45b4
MONKEY
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None of it really appeals to me.
But I do like the friends it's got me, I know that sounds weird (it got you friends?) But I mean I met some like minded people through knowing about it, and they're the most awsome friends I've had.
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What film do atheists watch on Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th street.
All too often the NT life is bound in the chains of convention. Every word and thought is regulated and contrived to please those around. Every smile must be combined with a flickering glance to judge the approval of the surrounding mob. The NT is a whipped puppy, a small abused child huddling in the closet, wondering what he did wrong, a soldier desperately trying to return to lock-step, lest he stand out. His soul is poked and prodded by the expectation of every little social script, choking on some grand design pontificated by consensus of society.
I would point you toward and encourage you to enjoy your freedom. Find a flower or bug, take off your shoes and throw your bag aside, then kneel down on the grass in your nice pants and just stare at whatever makes you happy for as long as you please with a giant genuine smile on your face while those around you scoff and say "look at that ret*d!" That's freedom.
Of course, you are free to do whatever you want. That's the point XD
I registered just to reply to this post. I am a "neurotypical" and do not have AS or Autism.
Succinctly, this post is utter garbage and completely untrue.
If NTs don't understand Aspies and Autistics (which is probably true in many cases), this post is a clear indicator that Aspies and Autistics do not understand NTs any better. NTs are not chained to some sort of "social bylaws" document, indicating that you must behave in some prescribed manner. Every action is not governed by social acceptance, every word is not uttered in a manner to please your peers. It does not take deliberation to determine if a particular act is socially acceptable. And NTs are not incapable of enjoying the simple pleasures in life, such as taking a seat in the grass and enjoying the sun. I sat by a tree the other day, just enjoying the view, without any inclination or caring if other people thought it strange.
NTs have an innate feel for what is and is not socially acceptable. It is, for the most part, as natural as breathing - just something you know. Furthermore, social acceptance is an enjoyable activity (for the most part). It isn't a tortuous event that must be premeditated and carefully constructed, constantly in fear of being outed. I legitimately enjoy the company of my peers. I enjoy making them laugh, or being capable of detecting unmentioned sadness and acting accordingly. it is not a burden but a delightful gift, almost supernatural, to be able to empathize with another human being without the need of direct language.
I'll step out of this thread now, because I have nothing to contribute to it. But I wanted to point out that NTs are not "whipped children", a rather insulting characterization that merely displays a general ignorance of "neurotypicals".
Brittany2907
The ultimate storm is eternally on it's
Joined: 9 Jun 2007
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,718
Location: New Zealand
All too often the NT life is bound in the chains of convention. Every word and thought is regulated and contrived to please those around. Every smile must be combined with a flickering glance to judge the approval of the surrounding mob. The NT is a whipped puppy, a small abused child huddling in the closet, wondering what he did wrong, a soldier desperately trying to return to lock-step, lest he stand out. His soul is poked and prodded by the expectation of every little social script, choking on some grand design pontificated by consensus of society.
I would point you toward and encourage you to enjoy your freedom. Find a flower or bug, take off your shoes and throw your bag aside, then kneel down on the grass in your nice pants and just stare at whatever makes you happy for as long as you please with a giant genuine smile on your face while those around you scoff and say "look at that ret*d!" That's freedom.
Of course, you are free to do whatever you want. That's the point XD
I registered just to reply to this post. I am a "neurotypical" and do not have AS or Autism.
Succinctly, this post is utter garbage and completely untrue.
If NTs don't understand Aspies and Autistics (which is probably true in many cases), this post is a clear indicator that Aspies and Autistics do not understand NTs any better. NTs are not chained to some sort of "social bylaws" document, indicating that you must behave in some prescribed manner. Every action is not governed by social acceptance, every word is not uttered in a manner to please your peers. It does not take deliberation to determine if a particular act is socially acceptable. And NTs are not incapable of enjoying the simple pleasures in life, such as taking a seat in the grass and enjoying the sun. I sat by a tree the other day, just enjoying the view, without any inclination or caring if other people thought it strange.
NTs have an innate feel for what is and is not socially acceptable. It is, for the most part, as natural as breathing - just something you know. Furthermore, social acceptance is an enjoyable activity (for the most part). It isn't a tortuous event that must be premeditated and carefully constructed, constantly in fear of being outed. I legitimately enjoy the company of my peers. I enjoy making them laugh, or being capable of detecting unmentioned sadness and acting accordingly. it is not a burden but a delightful gift, almost supernatural, to be able to empathize with another human being without the need of direct language.
I'll step out of this thread now, because I have nothing to contribute to it. But I wanted to point out that NTs are not "whipped children", a rather insulting characterization that merely displays a general ignorance of "neurotypicals".
I can see how you might have been piqued by tenalpgnorw's post. I think he was perhaps exaggerating and generalising, and not writing with a 'mixed' audience in mind. But I'd stand by what he said. Not all NTs are 'whipped puppys' incapable of acting outside the narrow constraints of acceptable proscribed behaviour, but most are.
Also, thanks for rubbing our noses in how easy and satisfying and lovely social relationships are for you. That's rather like bragging about how wonderful your ability to see colours makes you feel to a bunch of blind folk. No one was denying that that part of the NT package would be desirable.
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Also, thanks for rubbing our noses in how easy and satisfying and lovely social relationships are for you. That's rather like bragging about how wonderful your ability to see colours makes you feel to a bunch of blind folk. No one was denying that that part of the NT package would be desirable.
This is my point - "most" NTs are not whipped by the CHAINS OF SOCIAL ORDER at all. This is a complete misunderstanding on your part. Largely because there is no desire to act out of the status quo because the status quo is often enjoyable. Further because it is entirely possible, often probable, that NTs do step outside the status quo for various reasons.
I wasn't attempting to gloat - I was displaying how it isn't an evil curse, as tenalpgnorw would have you believe.
Also, thanks for rubbing our noses in how easy and satisfying and lovely social relationships are for you. That's rather like bragging about how wonderful your ability to see colours makes you feel to a bunch of blind folk. No one was denying that that part of the NT package would be desirable.
This is my point - "most" NTs are not whipped by the CHAINS OF SOCIAL ORDER at all. This is a complete misunderstanding on your part. Largely because there is no desire to act out of the status quo because the status quo is often enjoyable. Further because it is entirely possible, often probable, that NTs do step outside the status quo for various reasons.
I wasn't attempting to gloat - I was displaying how it isn't an evil curse, as tenalpgnorw would have you believe.
Okay, sorry. I see what you mean now. The idea that some people actually enjoy that stuff has never, ever crossed my mind before. I find it as alien as a chestburster in my freezer. Very interesting. What I percieve as 'chains' the NT sees as 'bonds'.
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