Aspie girls dont like very much aspie guys

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i don't know anyone diagnosed who's over the age of 11. but i'm willing to guess most of the guys i like and some i've dated are aspies.

i really don't like being misunderstood, nor having to speak all the time. nor dramatic or sentimental displays of emotion / affection. nor white lies, nor small talk, nor spending lots of time with anyone else, nor people who don't have obsessive interests, nor people whose homes are brightly lit, nor people who are social butterflies, nor anyone who gives crap one about proper social etiquette .. etc etc etc etc

I am not attracted to anyone, but I form friendships with neurodiverse people much more easily than with neurotypicals. Second-easiest to connect with are others who are on the "outside" of society, like other disabled people or eccentric neurotypicals.

An NT with similar interests would be somewhat harder for me to learn to understand than a neurodiverse person.

I think a lot of Aspie guys make a mistake when they set their goal as "find myself a girlfriend", as though a girlfriend were an item on a shopping list. Relationships are more fluid than that. The best you can do is to get to know a lot of people, and find out whether any of those people might be the sort you want to spend the rest of your life with.

I hate this thread!

I'm gay (and not "aspie", just autistic) but the one guy I dated for real (before I came out) was pretty socially nonstandard. I would easily date another autistic woman and if I was straight I'd date autistic guys as well as any other type of guys.

I have autistic guy friends. The only thing that has been a barrier between me and some autistic guys are the ones who won't take no for an answer. Autistic guys often wear their male privilege and all the crap it brings really close to the surface (but I don't like guys who hide it beneath the surface much better). So if I was into guys the unexamibed male privilege thing would be a massive turnoff. But it's not like it's beyond autistic guys to examine their male privilege and try to avoid throwing their power around. (And the "The world owes me a woman and if women don't like this then they must not appreciate some other aspect of me because I'm such a Nice Guy" thing? That's one of those male privilege being thrown around things that turns most self-respecting women off.)

I'm not sure what you mean by "male privilige"; is it a feminist term? I haven't studied feminism much, and I only really know as much about it as I instinctively know about why humans should have equal rights and how powerful groups treat non-powerful ones...

As far as women go, I think maybe there's a female analogue of "the world owes me a woman"; only it's less demanding and more... whiny? Desperate? I don't know; but it's equally distasteful. It's the idea that a woman isn't going to have a good life without a man, that she "needs a man" to make her life complete or her family whole. My mom fell prey to that idea, and she ended up marrying some real bastards who treated us all like crap. She's an intelligent woman, though she does have some autism-related deficits that make her socially naive (like all of our family, I think); but she had this idea that she couldn't manage raising two girls (one "very badly behaved"--i.e., autistic) on her own without a man, and it hurt all of us. We recovered, sure; but I think we'd have done better if she had only known that the "woman needs a man or her life will suck" idea is a total myth.

You mean in a sexual way? Well it depends in that case:

1. Are these girls heterosexual/bisexual?
2.Are they interested in sex?
3. Are they interested in romance with boys (whether they are asexual or not)?
4. Are they interested in aesthetics or personality?
5. Do they want to be in a relationship?

Personally, I'm just as interested (sexually) in aspie guys as I am with non aspie guys. Most of my friends are actually men on the spectrum so in terms of friendships, I get on pretty well with aspie guys. However, I get on well with my peers at college. I suppose it's something to do with my special interest. In terms of relationships, I'm kind of aromantic. I'm not interested in romance. Friendships are fine, just not romance. Maybe that will change- maybe not. I don't care.

And you posted on it


I don't know the statistics for relationships where both partners are Aspies.

I DO know that I would find it unbearable living with someone who demonstrated the Asperger's behavior that I do

It's not as annoying as other garbage on other parts of the internet but I'll still nuke it from orbit



EDIT: also bile fascination.

Last edited by Warsie on 31 May 2010, 2:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Base Delta Zero.

Best order ever.

and that is the best facepalm ever.

It depends on the person.

I dislike a lot of traits that aspie guys tend to have, but NTs also have the traits. Just less of them do.

The whole Adam movie was so implausible because if he said that in real life, there was no way she would have put up with him that long to start with... it was clearly an example of an NT filmmaker trying to romanticize our self-centeredness.

Sliced bread isn't even so great, though! Saying you're better than the iPad, now that's saying something!

Not sure about this statement.

Women are able to put up with quite a lot when it comes to relationships and it is not uncommon for women to go from abusive relationship to abusive relationship; although Beth did give up on Adam after he made it clear that he wanted/needed her to look after him.............which in the end he clearly did not need.

Ewwwww.