what would life be like without AS?

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Don't judge your insides by anybody else's outsides.

Seriously. Everyone tries to look their best. When I go out in public, I'm better groomed than usual, trying to keep my stimming at a level that doesn't distract people, trying to remember social niceties and stuff... and when I have a chance, I show off my knowledge a little. I'm certain my math teacher was absolutely shocked when she saw me have a public meltdown, because before that she'd seen "Dandy-- The Good Parts Version." (That would be the slightly geeky young woman whose best quality is being brilliant and immediately deducing the impact of any new information and whose worst quality is being just a little too pedantic. In other words, a picture composed of my actual qualities shown as they actually are, but leaving out the bad stuff.)

Similarly, I can recall that I never would have guessed that the outgoing, pretty girl at summer camp a couple years ago was dyslexic and terrified of being seen in anything revealing because she'd been bullied and insulted so often. Just when I was thinking I had more challenges than the others, she told me that (after I confessed Dandy's Life Story-- The Bad Parts Version).

But on the other hand, it's a fascinating thought. Who would Dandy the NT be? It requires considering deeply the nature of my Asperger's, and of personality and self in general. It cuts right to the heart of the ND vs. curebie debate.

As an easy part, without my sensory processing issues, I would not get into as many fights with my mother.

With an average ability to recognize faces, I would be a better artist and would have an easier time remembering who people are.

...But beyond that, I can't make any statements about what I would be like if I were NT, because either the statement doesn't go far enough to reach the NT range or the statement goes so far as to change me.

For instance, can I ask what I'd be like if I made eye contact? That seems clear-cut... but a big feature of my interactions with others is that I'm not looking at their eyes very much, and anyway, I have the ability to look someone in the eye briefly, so it's not like saying "if I could make eye contact..." Indeed, even that is not clear-cut.

If I were more social? But how much more social? Aren't there introverted NTs?

If the symptoms weren't explained by my Asperger's, I'd be diagnosable as having OCD and ADHD. Would I still be like that if I were NT? (Wouldn't that mean I wasn't NT?)

In the end, I guess the issue (as always) is that I don't understand the question. Asperger's isn't its own neat little box, totally separate from the neat little box marked NT, which is in turn separate from a bunch of other little boxes marked ADHD and OCD and RAD. People might fit the boxes, but more people fit in the spaces between.

Does the question require that I understand what friendship is? I do. Does it require that I be able to read emotions from faces and voices at a rate better than chance? I can. Does it require that I read them with the same facility as an average NT? (What is an "average NT?")

Do I get to be an introverted NT? That would suck. It would be like an extraverted Aspie: so contradictory I bet it could only lead to PAIN and SUFFERING.

This is such a complicated question.

He is still very leaky!! ! kept leaking my toes *yuck* lol but he inda just like leaking everything... and he also leaks his own p***s ...guess he's just cleaning it

He's 2 months old, I just got him one week ago. He's pretty tiny and won't grow too much. He's a moodle = poodle cross maltese.

I've been teaching him "sit"...he's almost there! Half of the time when I say "sit" he would sit.
Oh, and he used to get really scared and start barking as soon as I leave his eyesight, but now he understands when I say "be right back" and I'll say "I'm coming" when I'm back...and he doesn't bark anymore

By the way, you're a female Aspie *shake hands* and you're quite mature... I wonder when were you diagnosed?... coz I assume that back in the day Asperger wasn't really noticed? Even now in my home country (where I originally came from)...somewhere in Asia.... no one knows or give a damn about Asperger. Pretty lucky that I moved to Australia=)

PS. I looked at your website. I don't have PTSD, but nice job!! ! And you have a little koala on the web (im obsess with animals ) and koala is from aus anyway, if you dont mind, (im just curious), what was your job before you retired?

I would have friends and go to school and I would be much much happier. I wouldn't be here. I wonder what I'd be doing right now. Probably sleeping.

Life without autism would be awesome. It would be a huge weight off my shoulders.

Same here.

Though while watching A Baloo Switchero, made me wonder, what if an Aspie should get 'trapped' in a nt or vice versa. Now, would they still be an Aspie? Or if not, how would they deal without, like, being hypersensitive to noise and stuff like that. I'm thinking about writing a story like that.

Persian, you should write it!

How could I imagine it? It doesn't have a beginning, it isn't a thing that flares up. I am always this way, never free of this mind and these perceptions, this skn, these eyes. I have always been this way. I suppose I would enjoy a shower and not feel exposed and raw and wait for my pores to close to relax. I suppose I would let someone brush my hair. Maybe I would travel? Maybe I wouldn't have such anxiety? Maybe sitting close to someone wouldn't make me wanna run? I have no idea and there is no space here to list what I might be able to deal with without life 'interrupted' response. But then would every minute hold the potential for perfect? Am I willing to sacrifice all the times I do get to feel perfect, when everything is just right? When I feel it in the blood that pumps through me with every passing second. Would I give it up?

Finally! You too? I'm not the only one. Tell me, have you ever found a solution? A substitute for a shower? Or a routine?

A shower feels like such an invasion to me. Baths are okay but not a very good way to wash hair.

I only take baths and I wash my hair in them. After I'm done with the bath, while the water's draining, I use a cupt o pour water over my head a few times to be sure my hair is well rinsed and then stand up and pour a few cupfuls of water down my body to make sure the soap's all off. My hair comes out clean and light-weight and shiny and I feel refreshed and ready to live in the world again.

Showers make me dizzy and don't get me anywhere near as clean as a good bath.