Do you invite people to your home?

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I moved across the entire country to escape my family. I lived just under 1 hour away from the city I call "home". These things assure that I do not get too many "random" drop ins. That said, my neighbors will drop in on me to check up and such.

I have a 40-acre estate type of place that is quite large for a single person. On occasion I actually enjoy having my friends come over to enjoy it. I carefully plan and prepare for these events and hire out much of the "work." Still it is alway exhausting so I do it very rarely. I have had parties of several hundred people on my property in the summer. Last July I had my entire football team and friends over for the entire 4th of July weekend. 3 days and 2 nights of people. Given the acerage it is natural for people to bring tents and to camp out. So it isn't like everyone is actually IN my home. Still there are people in and out. The thing that saves me is that my house is very large so it doesn't feel "crowded" even with a party of 15-30. The property is so big that I can always walk a very short distance down the trail and be all alone. (which I do of course)

These things allow me to be part of the "people" thing and still be sane. When I lived in suburb or apartment style housing I did NOT invite people over as a rule but had a few select friends who I would allow to visit me if they asked for it.

Last edited by kfisherx on 03 Apr 2011, 3:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Rarely. Usually just the closest friends, by appointment. That way I have time to prepare the space.

I extremely dislike unannounced company. I can't control (politely) the duration of their stay, or anticipate what they might want to eat/drink/watch etc.

I can't remember the last time I've invited anyone over. I just don't feel comfortable having someone look at my things. Its like letting them into my mind and knowing my secrets. Its my asylum from the outside world and when someone comes inside.......I just don't like it. I hated living with my ex because she always invited people over at odd times of the day and it just threw me for a loop. I'd be sitting their relaxing playing a game or whatever and then in come all these stupid burn outs laughing at dumb things. Worthless people....

I'm OK with family or some close friends visiting me IF they call first. I hate having someone sleeping over or someone stopping by unexpectedly (even if it's for a cup of coffee). I never had a party at my home or more than 4 people at once. Just as OP said - my home is my castle... where peace and quiet and my cats reign

It pains me to have people over. I am at unease people constantly asking me whats wrong? are you ok? They can actually see my unease when I am around them. My parents and my brother don't bring people home anymore because how much it makes my blood pressure spike. I guess they are afraid it might cause me to have a stroke or something.

I hate having people in my flat, it's my safety net.

Even if I have to wait for a delivery I'm pacing, can't sit still, need to pee constantly and then end up with IBS and migraine when they've gone. I won't even turn my door buzzer on unless I absolutely have to and if anyone knocks on the door and I'm not expecting anyone I won't answer, they can piss off. I haven't even had the gas or electric meter read for months and if the Council need to come in for repairs they'd better be on time or I'm on the phone wanting to know why they're late cause I get sooo het up.

Hate, hate, hate it.

Tiffinity.

No, except for my friend who has a standing invitation to visit, but I doubt she ever will.

My mom has threatened to visit me for several years, but has yet to do so.

No, but my wife does or they invite themselves. I don't like it. Too much pressure and I feel like my privacy is being violated.

Hate it. I prefer to deal with people in their space, not mine. It feels like too much exposure of me if they're in my space and can look around at everything. Especially a bedroom says a lot about a person and I'd rather avoid that kind of scrutiny.

Be careful, they might be vampires, and once you invite a vampire into your home they never leave....


But, in all seriousness, I try to avoid having people over, I'm don't like people invading my space.

I don't invite people over. I don't have any friends so no one comes over basically and I go to other peoples places if invited.
I have a boyfriend who has friends over but his friends make a bit of noise and I love my peace and quiet. Have had a couple of small parties at my place but I don't like being around people. I like my own space.

yes; I invite a few friends over at times. I remember back in high school how badly I wish I could have a friend over but back then I literally didn't have one single friend. Now, I have about 3 close friends and am more than happy to have them over for a meal or visit them.

Not often. Generally, the people I invite to my home are family or very close friends. There are exceptions, like kids' birthday parties and things of that nature.

I'm never comfortable with someone being here that doesn't have a bed here.

I do only if I have to. Usually only for birthdays and holidays, and I only invite family. Still don't like it much. A few times people have invited themselves over, if they're pleasant and nice folks I'd agree. We haven't invited anyone who's not family for years.

I keep fantasizing about the day when I'll be free - everyone other than my husband forget about me, and I can be as isolated as I want. As of right now, I host on average 4 - 6 birthday parties every year, and every Easter, Thanksgiving and Christmas party seem to be at my house, too.

Me too. I've had meltdowns in the past when people would show up without calling. I still hate when people do that. I like to be able to mentally prepare myself for people coming over to my house.

I very rarely have company over to my house, if I socialize it's usually because they've invited me somewhere.

Hmm, weird. I actually prefer people to come without advance notice, as I have anxiety issues, anticipation can really bother me. Especially if they are late or didn't come at all I can get really upset. I used to ask DH to book doctor's appointments for me and not tell me, so I wouldn't be stressed about them before.

My brother (also aspie) and I almost never give each other advance notice before visits, and we never stay for more than 15 minutes at a time. It worked out perfectly. Our relationship is comfortable as we don't irritate each other much.