Aspie Girls Awkwardness

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I always thought I came off as normal, but I don't based on what people/friends tell me. The only people who think I come off normal are my parents and people like that. The only thing I know how to do to look somewhat normal/less awkward is use my sense of humor...I developed a dry, sarcastic, really witty sense of humor and it's what has gotten me by in many situations. But, it does make me seem less feminine for some reason (oh well, can't have everything). People say I have a 'guy' sense of humor or I"m not 'girl funny', whatever that means. I also do stuff like wear normal clothes and try to look nice which makes me look more normal.

Like someone else said, people don't see me and think "ooh she's Asperger's" they just think I'm either awkward, rude, nervous, etc. They all have different opinions.

I'm kind of surprised no one has mentioned dyspraxia (motor clumsiness) as a source of awkwardness (unless someone did and I missed it). I am often aware of how awkwardly I move, but it's not something I can change or camoflauge or have control over. I feel that that contributes to how I appear to others.... especially when I don't know what to do with my arms, or I trip or drop things.

I used to be jealous of how other girls moved and danced because I can't move in those ways and it made me feel weirdly un-female (or when I was a child and all the other girls were doing flips and cartwheels but I couldn't, I just felt pathetic). But I don't really care anymore.... much.

Heh.

I didn't learn how to ride a bike until I was 17.

I didn't learn how to tie my shoes properly until I was 7.

I still look like I'm "limping" whenever I walk.

I haven't been diagnosed with dyspraxia or anything, but I have a vague idea how you feel.

Aspie girls are generally quite lucky because their awkwardness can come across as cute anyway.

No.

All it did was make it easier for people to beat me up, or for them to call me a "ret*d" because I couldn't master simple things.

I've never been taken for "cute." I was just a smaller, weaker "man" that was easy to push around. In my experience, in public school, boys only refrained from beating the tar out of "pretty girls" that they might want to have sex with. No such luck for me.

i'm pretty sure you're joking here.
cuteness is sexiness and ease of movement and general "perfect coordination". if i try to shake my hair cutely i have people backing away and asking"is there a bee in your hair?" so no.

Well I did say generally speaking, but this does bring up an interesting subject, because it could point to how girls are underdiagnosed - maybe the ones who do indeed manage to pass off as cute never seem to have anything "wrong" with them?

i see how you're bashing here, but i will answer. If you put "cute"as a definition of what an aspie girl can't have, then yes. they are not cute. they can be good looking, act tomboyish in a fun and even attractive manner, but they will never be the pink ones

wait a sec. i may have misunderstood what you said. some indeed take on a "cute helpless persona", a pink one, even if not wearing dresses at school. because it makes it easier for them to make "blonde blunders"and get away with it. but it must be tiring acting stupid all the time, because if your friend find out that you're smart, they will get mad at you next time you mess up. sorry for the huh paranoid overreaction let's blame it on hormones! ( see what i did there?).

Last edited by ediself on 11 Nov 2010, 1:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm not bashing anyone, merely pondering.

I personally find shy girls cute, maybe that's just me then

my key worker told me us girlies are the best actresses, that we can hide our aspergers and thats why they think its rarer in females, because we can act.

Good point about dyspraxia. I drop stuff so much it's like part of my "style" When I drop a mug my first thought is 1. watch out toes! and 2. oh, I get to get a new one now!

As far as dancing is concerned it was really hard so I just stayed in lessons until I figured it out. So even if you have problems with rhythm or coordination, it is something you can learn. It's never too late and it's super fun. In fact, an adult class would have way less pressure

Though others have disagreed, I see what you mean. Sometimes people made fun of me for it, but usually, the guys who laugh seemed to like it somehow.

yeah i apologised and edited actually.....i can be really impulsive at the end of the day

In reply to your edit, I'm not referring to girls who act stupid, I hate those.

meh, you're a man, you call women "cute".... you wouldn't notice a thing

Possibly, although, based on nothing but my biased personal experience, it's a pretty tall order to turn that level of awkwardness into "cute." My "limping," head-bobbing, stuttering, and strange movemments didn't endear me to many.

Me = Spaz Queen!! !

Also, I mentioned before that I'm taller than most women, so I was taller than most of the boys until around 8th grade. That didn't help my "cuteness" factor, either.