Do those not on the spectrum ever really understand?

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They can emphatize but I doubt they can ever fully understand it. Unless they can "come inside" of us

The first thing i feel which would be a great improvement for bridging this would be getting
more awareness that the autism spectrum is not a disease or something terrible but neurodiversity.

I hope i can see this in my lifetime.

I don't believe that anyone, not even people on the spectrum, fully understand. Everyone who is on the spectrum is still less or non autistic in some ways.

My Mom does understand me better than my Dad, but Dad's comming around.

I wish my Mum would understand AS. I got really stressed before because I found that someone else had used my mug, when I can't have anyone but me use it. She got angry at me and said I was just acting like a child, and Dad said that everything in this house is for sharing, and that I'm overreacting and I could get over this if I wanted to. They just don't even try to understand how it feels for me when someone just goes and breaks my rules about my stuff!

I think alot of misunderstanding occurs because Aspies process information differently. I think we deal with the logistics first, and then the emotions. Whereas NTs deal with the emotions first and then the logistics. I think that aspie emotions are relative flat, compared to the average NT. The advantage we have is that we can solve problems in social interaction because our thoughts are not clouded by emotions that would get in the way of acknowledging or solving a problem. Our way of processing is at odds with the NT way of processing information.

This is a typical misunderstanding between myself and my NT sister:

ME: I am angry about ( a problem we are having) and I am not sure what to do about it.

MY SISTER: How can you be so MEAN? Think how X feeels about that. It's NOT X's fault. X has feeelings you know. WHY do you have to be sooo NASTY?? WHy do you have to put people down so much? You are a REALLY nasty person.

ME: No, I am just acknowledging the problem and my feelings about it. If we all acknowledge the problem then maybe it can be resolved. And yes, I am very angry about this problem.

MY SISTER: You are such a b***h. You are. I mean it. You don't care about anyone's feelings at all.

It is very confusing, though, when you can't state a simple fact to a person without them getting all upset. It seems better to me for a person to be able to voice a complaint in a factual, logical manner. Then it seems the reasonable thing for the other person to do is respond in the same manner. Then a compromise can be reached or a solution can be found. Too bad it doesn't always work this way.

Anandamide, I can remember having very similar disagreements with one or two of my family members, and wondering what made them act like that.

"A lot of the reason why "NTs" don't understand us is because they are close minded"
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For most people all they can handle is simple answers,you're either normal or ret*d. If you tell them you ain't normal, than you are ret*d.

Everything needs to be put in black or white for most people,there is nothing else.

"I think alot of misunderstanding occurs because Aspies process information differently. I think we deal with the logistics first, and then the emotions. Whereas NTs deal with the emotions first and then the logistics"
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They don't seem to be able to get past the emotional part of much.

somebody in my town started a forum just aimed at town government/politics. There is no reasoning with people that are emotional basket cases. They go hysterical over the high taxes and there is no way to convince them they either got to pay or attack the payroll which makes up over 80% of the cost of my towns government.

Mention that the cops,teachers or firemen are overpaid and they get hysterical about it and start babbling about they saw a police car idling. Like somehow if it wasn't left idling their taxes would be different Most people know a cop or firemen or school teacher and somebody that suggests cutting their friends or relatives pay or their job completely suddenly becomes their enemy and a evil person full of hate.

Most of the remaining less than 20% of the cost of government is pretty much fixed,they need books for the schools, cars for the cops, heat & electricity for the government buildings. Little chance of reducing the less than 20% enough to effect the overall tax bill.

It's futile to try and reason with emotional people about salaries & benifits because they are convinced the cops,firemen & teachers deserve every cent they make and they deserve the benifits they get.

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I used to drive a truck and sinse deregulation of trucking the job has just become a sweatshop on wheels. I found some online forums and joined a drivers organization and learned it's hopeless to try to reason with hysterical emotional people about ways to improve the job.

If you people want to retain your sanity just sit back and enjoy the show put on by the NT's. There is no getting along with them or reasoning with them,just find some hobbies you can do alone and laugh your butts of at the insane NT world.

Many of them are good examples for how not to approach life,they are financial morons who kill themselves trying to impress each other.

My mother is also an aspie. That didn't change her desire for an NT child. So contrary to what you might think: I got told to get out and make friends, provide her with grandchildren and not to sit at home alone even if my mother prefers to be alone all of the time. In fact my sister is NT and mum loves it cause she brings the whole herd with her even if she does sit and do crosswords rather than interact with him. I think paralleling with other people makes her feel happy and connected tho she isn't aware of the interaction level that should be going with it. Noone visits her or calls on the phone besides family. She doesn't have friends as such. She really didn't want me to be an aspie I guess - normal made her feel more normal and accepted.

Even people that are ON the spectrum don't understand the feelings of other people who are similar. Giggles, but isn't that a given?

How's this for an aspie obsession. How many people go shopping alone survey - why would you want to shop together with somebody, even the very people you might be buying groceries for, like a partner LOL. If you're an aspie, I know from experience, you can actually shop way after they've closed the doors and they're are only storepackers before they identify that you're actually a customer and shouldn't be there. You won't realise. Oh bells, announcements, the doors are closing - nope that might be a cue for everybody else but did I notice. It took an hour before I was evicted. I had to try 3 shopping centre doors before I worked out which one they left open, they forgot to tell me how to get out when they evicted me and of course I didn't ask. Yes it is funny. Oh and typically, I didn't abandon my groceries, I paid for them and left with them despite the fact that they had to unlock a cashregister in order to do this. I stuck to the routine and had everyone else follow it too LOL.

It would be great to shop for groceries after the srore was closed. No bright lights, no muzak, no other customers. All aloooone.

That sounds so perfect! And it is great to hear someone else say it!! !
I shop at night (24 hour stores) and I get to experience this as close as I can. They turn half the lights off at night too, so thats great