Aspie Living Alone = Disaster?

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The problem is I don't have anyone to socialize with "to balance out the lonely downtimes."

If I do try to socialize I feel as though I'm annoying the other person.

Yeah. It probably does. But in this conversation, it's more important what he meant, than what he would have meant if he was using the word what you consider "properly". Most people don't use words in the most academic definition possible. Most people also don't use words the way the dictionary means them (or at least, they don't consult dictionaries before using every word). Most people use words in line with one common usage or another. And that's a perfectly fine way to use most words. The common usage of a word determines that particular meaning of the word, even if there are other possible meanings to the word, and even if there are "academic" meanings of a word. It doesn't render it invalid to use a word the way it's commonly used. The world of language is not controlled by prescriptivist linguists, much as they would like to control it. Language is a living thing. He meant what he meant, he didn't mean what the dictionary meant, and arguing with him by insisting he meant (or ought to have meant) what the dictionary meant (once you know what he meant) is pretty unproductive. Common vernacular is perfectly valid usage (again, outside of the most prescriptivist settings), that's why English is a living language and not a dead one. After context made it clear what he meant, it didn't really make sense to jump in and try to correct him.

As both a "common vernacular" introvert and an "academic sense" introvert I really don't give a crap what usage someone uses as long as I can figure out what they meant by it. And when someone who has real trouble with loneliness when he doesn't have friends, says he envies introverts, it's really likely not because he envies the "academic sense" introverts, because that just wouldn't make sense in context. I can see misunderstanding at first, but once it became clear what he meant, it really doesn't matter anymore.

Reality's never really done that for me. Not until I collapse from exhaustion/hunger/thirst/sleep deprivation/etc. (And even happening to know I'm hungry or thirsty or whatever, isn't strong enough to break a perseveration.) By then I often have a migraine and/or seizures from lack of food, water, and sleep, which would have prevented me from getting them even when it was sometimes possible for me to get such things on my own. (Especially a migraine which will generally cause me to vomit up anything I eat or drink anyway.) All of which leaves me messed up for days at best.

Do you get any therapy or sessions to help deal with it? Or help with routines?

You could try scedualling your day pretty specifically. Like what meals to have on certain days. When to cook and what to do. You could put in days where you want to spend time with your family too!! You'd sitll be able to see them. and what not.

What would these therapy sessions entail?

BTW, I would LOVE to schedule my day but I honestly don't have anything to do. Hopefully things will get better since college is starting next week.

I live alone and actually require it I have learned. I have a great support system and a LOT of friends. Do NOT need anyone in my house.

I haven't lived with a roommate since college. Sometimes I wonder if I would've been more social if I had lived with people, but I think all it would do is annoy me. Still, I wish I weren't so alone.

It reminds me of 30 Rock's Liz Lemon, who has to be really careful to chew her food so she doesn't choke to death while she's eating alone. And she's very careful not to slip in the shower so she doesn't break her neck. Obviously it is humorous, but I've actually thought about what if I die alone in my apartment, and nobody figures it out until I start decaying?

I'd like to live alone, but I am not at that stage in life yet. I think if I got my act together a bit more often, I could survive alone. I think if you're clumsy, disorganised, unmotivated, and like to spend money on pointless things, you'd be in a tight spot, aspie or not.

WOW, at least YOU have a sibling! I'm an only child!

I pretty much went crazy when I was forced to live with roommates... so, yeah, pretty much, living alone is best for me.

I've found that my level of introversion requires human contact about once a week... though I don't start to actually suffer loneliness until I've been completely alone for a month, and even then it's pretty mild.

I am very anxious about the space around me. I am lucky to have my situation and be able to live alone. My heart goes out to those that are lonely or forced to live somewhere that increases their challenges. Ever since I left 'home' I cannot stand living anywhere that doesn't feel like a safe place. I don't have any mental downtime, life is always all over me. I am not able to turn it off and could never make it through casual interactions in the place I live. It is best for me to live alone. If not I have to live with someone completely independent. I don't do anything to a schedule and they must be detached from it or it is annoying. I understand the way I live is annoying to the 'normal' person, whatever that means. I don't eat on a schedule, sleep on a schedule, bath on a schedule...do anything to a schedule. I am not a baby that needs looking after, I need to be left alone to live the way it feels right in my brain. I am polite and respectful and conscious of someone's feelings. I need them to detach and not take my 'wrapped up in my own world' personally. Again, I am able to live with anyone when they have no expectations that I am there to fit their plans.

From 11 y.o. to 31 y.o., to live alone was the main goal in my life (at 31 - I am 37 now - I finally attained that goal).

At what point is anyone able to draw upon knowledge of their own capabilities and skills, as well as past experiences to form an opinion of what is likely to happen without the suggestion that the outcome was a matter of self-sabotage?

I think that this is largely simply two ways of saying the same thing. In practice, if you have "need to recharge after social interaction" (instead of having need to recharge after periods of isolation), these mean that you feel more happy alone than socializing, no?

My impression is that this talk of "needing to recharge after social gatherings" is nothing more than a way of saying "being happy alone" in a sociable acceptable manner (avoiding the stigma of "hermit" , "misanthrope"or "antisocial").

Heh, my username means hermit.

But the difference is a person can really crave being around people and need to recharge after social interaction. I've never liked sticking to that recharging vs energized by social interaction definition because it makes it virtually impossible to say "autistic extrovert" in so few words, among other things.

Nope.

Being alone doesn't automatically make me "happy" any more than breathing makes me "happy." It's something I need, but it doesn't come with "happiness" attached. In fact, my inability to be around people makes my life quite miserable at times.