Would you want your kids to be autistic at all?

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A kid is a kid. And the next generation will have a great deal many more opportunities than we do today.

Personally, I don't want children because I don't want to get married. But I think I may become a foster parent, if I can.

i would prefer my children to be NT but they aren't. some are more difficult than others. my 5yo is pdd-nos. he is very defiant and does things regardless of knowing that they are not allowed, doesn't care how his actions effect anyone else and basically needs to be treated like a baby in alot of ways although he seems to think he is all grown up. i need to baby proof everything for him and keep all doors locked at all times to avoid his distroying things. the other kids call him The Distructor. all 3 of my other kids are either diagnosed AS or on their way to being diagnosed. they are not nearly as difficult and i wouldn't want to change them. i love their quirks as irritating as it can be sometimes. i have one that can't be around anyone who's eating. they all have difficulty making friends. they are all smart and kind hearted, other than the5yo who seems to enjoy being a monster. i think it would be much easier if they were all NT and the parenting courses i took and all the advice i get could actually be applied to them. but i love them and there are certain things about them that i wouldn't want to change and i can't tell if these things are part of the AS or just their personalities.

Wishing for your child not to be autistic so others won't hurt them is like wishing for your child not to be a girl so they won't suffer sexism.

I might find it easier to relate to a kid like me, but would care for them however they are.

If I ever grow up and become the kind of person that I believe should have children, meet someone who I want to spend the rest of my life with ( for real this time) and I am in a financial position to take care of a child then I think I would prefer to have a child with a mild expression of autism or AS because I would relate to her better....even though I know it would be maddening to deal with her if she were as rigid and stubborn as I am!

I greatly fear that if I had children they would not be much like me. It is difficult to respect different opinions and things that aren't one's own. It makes me sad when parents enforce their own beliefs on their children. I do not want to do this.

Im pretty sure it wont. Its their physical prescence which I hate the most. The way others act when around them. The noises drive me crazy. 3 noises that make me go insane are dogs barking, kids crying and hammer banging a nail.

No. I chose not to have kids a long time ago because I knew something was wrong with me. I just wasnt sure what it was. I'm glad I made that choice knowing what I do today.

I wouldn't care. Nor would I care what "degree" of autism (as if that's even measurable).

My children and I celebrate our differences and have a much better understanding of each other, son with AS and Daughter hyper, dyslexic and with intense interests too (my be female AS). I had a horrible time as a child and teenager because no one understood me and I felt like an outcast amongst my own family, it is however much different for my kids I parent with that in mind, it didn't all come naturally but you get the hang of when to step in and offer extra support. My biggest problem was figuring out that I had AS and listening to professionals telling me my kids problems were related to something else, if I had come across this earlier in their lives it would have made it even easier to help, but all I can do is move forward from here and help them find their unique way in life.

I'd rather that my kids be on the spectrum. I could have someone to relate to. I also wouldn't mind if my kids were NT, either. I also wouldn't mind if my kids were DD. I'd be willing to work with what God gives me. Every life is precious.

I don't want kids, but that's got nothing to do with not wanting to pass on Asperger's. If I did have kids, I'd actually want them to have it. I see Asperger's as more of a gift than anything else.

Well, I must say, I have found the responses to this thread fascinating.

I honestly would prefer to have a son, in many ways. Our society is horribly sexist, and I think the life of a female is much harder than life for males... Things like bitchiness, periods, sexism, puberty, rape, life just seems easier for males. I find it interesting that you used that as an example.


Glider18, I find your opinions interesting... You seem happier about your autism than many people whose opinions I have read. Can I ask if you have ever found life difficult because of ASD?

Shaybugz, I completely understand... My girlfriend has ASD, and I see what she has gone through, especially whilst in school, and cringe at the thought of our kids going through the same things... I definitely see your comments as empathy.

Wefunction, I found your opinions very insightful too.

When I created this thread, I was expecting most people to say "it wouldn't matter", but this has been a very interesting look into how people feel about their own autism really. I must say, I think I may be hesitant to have a child with the significant risk of the child having ASD... Perhaps even to the point where I would suggest adoption to my girlfriend... I don't think it is the life I would want to choose for my children... Though in saying that, I love everything about my girlfriend, and honestly, if they invented a cure for autism tomorrow, I would strongly suggest she didn't take it. I guess my problem is more with how autism affects children growing up. It is not what I would want for my kids.

I think that people are so into perfection these days, that their kids have to be perfect, too. It almost makes me sick in a way.

Look, my girlfriend is autistic. High funtioning autistic. I am NT. And I love her for everything, including her autism. It is something in her that I really treasure. But I still wouldn't want my kids to go through all the problems she has had in life.




I don't want my kids to be perfect. I want them to be happy in life. Nothing more. And I kinda feel that having ASD would make this harder for them.

Because NT kids have perfect lives with no problems?

That's why I would prefer an AS child to an NT. I'm planning on homeschooling our child, and I think that I would do a much better job homeschooling an aspie than I would an NT, because that's how I grew up. If we decided on sending our kid to a regular school though, I think I would be a bit worried as you never know what kind of teacher they'll get or what sorts of kids will be in their class. I was teased a lot when I was little, I wouldn't want my child to go through that.