Are you a self-centred, selfish ass?

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Probably. although, not really on purpose.

They can't see how self centered they are when they project onto others.
They can't see how self centered they are when they can't love their own child because that child is not an extension of themself and has their own identity.

I probably come off that way sometimes but no I would not describe myself as such.

Yep, pretty much.

Actually I internally care for people. Sharing my feelings is pretty difficult. It comes out in a monotone and sounds fake.
Or I might be inattentive to someone's feelings.
Or I might respond more harshly than I intended to.

If I was feeling snarky I would tell them that I am not a donkey and leave them to figure out what I meant.


In all seriousness it has been implied that I am self-centered and it makes me very angry because I am not. I like to donate my time, items, and money. I like to help people. I would give a stranger the jacket off my back if they asked. So what if I like to have certain things my way sometimes? There is nothing wrong with that. Everybody likes to have certain things done a certain way.

As for any rude comments I might make...well I regret them, but half the time I surprise myself by what I say. As I said, I am not a mean, self-ish, self-centered person. At least I don't think I am.

I do have rather large ears.

I think part of the problem is the loose sounding diagnostic criteria for Asperger's, to the layperson it really does sound like just about everybody and it's easy to think that people saying they have it are just trying to get away with something. ADHD has similar issues, since it's widely seen as a "trendy" diagnosis to explain away obnoxious children as having a "condition" rather than simply being ill behaved. I don't tend to get too worked up about it, anyone who knows me gets that I've never been normal and has no trouble believing that I have a genuine issue, but I can see how other people would get frustrated by the denialist attitude.

Agree with what others have said!

And a year ago I probably would have said "no!". Now I've started to realise that so long as being selfish doesn't mean going out of your way to harm others, it's actually a good thing.

No. I'm kind and generous, and when I was at school I would make the effort to befriend those who didn't seem to have friends. I have had my selfish moments, of course, but it is not my default setting. It's actually a shock for me to see others being selfish and egocentric.

No, i don't think so...

All humans can be self centred, selfish and asses, to be honest.
I think maybe Aspies come across as selfish and self centred, because of our difficulties in picking up on the feelings, wants and needs of others, without being explicitly told, and that can make us seem, perhaps, non-reciprocal.
However, some of the kindest people I have met have been others on the spectrum. People who will bend over backwards to please, once they have come to understand your wishes a little better.

My mom says I am. Oddly, she's the only one who says it. At work people always say the opposite. My mom is probably right, though. I'm selfish and self centered. Not to mention completely useless. The only things I'm good for are watching tv, reading useless books, and surfing the internet.

I tried to resist. Honestly I did. But in the end I posted a comment highlighting the attitudes being portrayed and sarcasticly asking them whether this is the level of compassion they show to all people with disabilities.

One poster, who hadn't actually said anything unpleasant, immediately apologised for any offense she may have caused (she hadn't) and asked me some questions about how lonely and isolating it feels to be autistic and have people take these negative attitudes. So I explained some of the frustrations of aspieness, like sudden ending of friendships and not knowing why, of being in trouble for answering a question because you didn't know that you're not supposed to answer honestly and suchlike.

Then another poster promptly tells me that what I say is rubbish. She knows far more about autism than I do because she's a teacher and has had autistic children in her class. And then everyone starts asking her about autism in adults and completely ignoring me, the only autistic adult in the house.

I swear to god, we're not the weird ones. We're just the minority.