Do you get tired of people? Is it just me or AS?

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AMEN!

I hate being so crowded here in SoCal; I'd leave if my career wasn't here for now. I want somewhere with much more open space. My first year here, I literally would spend entire nights trying to find a place in the area with no people or cars or bright light... couldn't. Thought I'd go crazy, honestly. Still hate being in clubs and groups of people, because I expend SO MUCH energy trying to "stay aware" of my environment (particularly if I suspect some level of danger to my person, a mild phobia of mine).

I go bicyclin at 3AM (the only hour in SoCal where SOME places are quiet) and ride through the stillness with an audio book on headphones, fantasizing about an empty world. I collect books where 99% of a plague has wiped out virtually all of humanity. Just the thought of escaping all the social *B.S.* excites me.

No more judgments at work based on whether I wear the same shirt two days in a row, or the same outfits each week. No more judgments that I'm a jerk because I come in, do my work, and leave. No more parties and groups of people deciding I'm stupid / a jerk / a weirdo just because I missed some stupid little social cue... they don't know how confusing and exhausting it is for me! I try SO HARD.

I like INDIVIDUALS. One or two close friends is fine, perhaps a few more casual friends, and some acquaintances.

I mean, it's like I have to train and educate any person I want to have close to me; I'm CONSTANTLY misinterpreted. New social situations are like walking on needles, I've been shut down or blown off so many times in my life now.

Okay, this is becoming a rant. I guess I just wanted to add my two cents to this forum.

Reply if there's something this touches on for you; I'm game.

I think anyone can feel like this, but also that Aspies / auties and other NDs tend to feel this more than NTs.

hey brah.
in a way i understand but i cannot understand the whole thing as i am not you. all i do no is i find it so fustrating to be in the room at times because i just do and it makes me want to tell the person to ")£*£& off. when they have done absolutely nothing. i drink a lot of cola to deal with my depression when im annoyed or upset after the forth litre i feel better. i listen to john denver as well and some old folk songs of war that give me a passionate lust and excitement. i cannot really describe how i feel. i just feel so elated. i sometimes do really inapropriate things after hearing them for an hour. i once started singing men of harlech in class and in my college hostel, i was wand up with a gap student and just shouted loud well screamed loud i was just so elated and annoyed at the same time. i dont know why i do, but i just feel so pent up and i want to know why i do such idiotic things.

brother devil

It's like watching Friends OR Big Bogan aka "Big Brother "

It doesn't necessarily have to be a social situation for me to feel this way. I was in a supermarket on Sunday, just for a few things. We were having problems finding some stuff, as they weren't where we'd expect them to be, so it took a lot longer than originally anticipated. By the end, I was feeling almost tearful and saying to my husband 'I need to go NOW'. But social situations always have this effect on me, even if I really like the person. It would need to be the perfect person, i.e. my Dad, for me to want to stay on.