Being an Aspie is the worst

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I personally think your reality is more of a choice than you are willing to admit. But irregardless of that your reality is not mine. There is a lot of diversity among spectrumites. have had a job 99 % of the time since i've been out of high school. Some were good, some not so. I think the one I have come across now is generally the best I have had. Trying to find a job that pays the bills and doesn't make you entirely miserable is a struggle EVERYONE deals with. True some people have certain difficulties that make maintaining employment not an option. For me once i developed a 'work ethic' i find i excel better than most people i come across, i think partially due to autism. I am not bogged down with social intricacies and I am able develop new ways of doing things. Also once you find the groove, business type social interaction are much simpler than other kinds. They are meant to be reasonable and to the point.

If you are unable to work, why dont you absorb yourself in an interest? you have eyes that others do not to absorb immense amounts of knowledge, and if you dont have to waste your time slaving for a company you should be cherishing your precious time.

there was a time i too was envious of lack of deep social connection. occasionally these feelings crop up still. get over it. you cant change it. do what you can.

You're only 22? Give yourself some time to grow into your own skin. Find something you're good at, and excel at it. Everything will then fall into place.

I used to get very frustrated by who I am and would actually go outside and yell at the sky, "Why am I like this?" I've had the typical Aspie life and have had difficulty fitting in, but I just keep going on. I found ways to use my special interests at various jobs and am doing alright for myself. Yeah, it's not fair that anyone has AS, but then, what is fair? Everybody has"something" in their life, even people who's life looks perfect. But you just have to work with what you have and do your best. Maybe that sounds hokey, but there's no "cure" for AS, so I just do my best.

You might be capable of living on your own, just about everyone is. However, if you're a young person with aspergers, can you do it without financial help? If so, chances are you have a very mild case.
Also, I call not being able to socialize properly (which is a very basic skill for humans) a mental handicap. It doesn't mean you're stupid, it means you can't function properly in the real world- of course unless you have some kind of job that's specially cut out for a full blown aspie, whatever the hell that is.

I met my ex's and husband online, as for unemployment, you can go out and look for work and I know how hard that is when they make it so difficult and won't even hire you nor call you for an interview. Since you have the diagnoses, you can maybe go to the voc rehab or some place that is for people with disabilities, if it's available in your area and if you qualify.

Plus friends are over rated. I have none in real life, only acquaintance. You can try online dating and make sure you meet them in a public spot where there be people like the mall or coffee shop or a store. My husband and I were chatting online for three weeks before we met in real life. My ex's, about a week. They weren't "normal" either. I could never get a guy in real life so I did it online which seemed easier and they all approached me.

I wasn't meaning that it was true for everyone. I was meaning that not hating being an aspie doesn't mean at all that we aren't aware that we're disabled. I'm absolutely disabled. More of my life than people realize is me dealing with my disability.

I don't hate myself because I'm disabled, that does not mean that I am not aware that I'm disabled.

I wouldn't call myself disabled, just different. I'm fully aware that I'm different, even when people try to "pretend" that I'm not. I even make jokes about it; I try to imply that it's all good and I'm ok with it...can't guarantee they get the joke, but often times people seem to feel somewhat more comfortable around me because of it.

You mean not being able to socialize with NTs. If I stuck a bonobo in with a clan of common chimpanzees, he would not be able to socialize with them "properly", that doesn't make bonobos mentally handicapped. You're not considering what "socialization" would be like in an aspie dominated world.

here here!

Well, unfortunately we don't live in that kind of world, as nice as it would be. I appreciate your positive opinion, but when trying to function in this world, normally there isn't much to be positive about. I mean, I love my life and new family, but it's always bad news when I try to live among the rest of the population. As you can see, many people here can relate to that - even you can as well I'm sure.
Sorry, I'm not trying to twist your optimism, just talking how I see it through my eyes.
And Burzum is the s**t. Nice avatar.

It really depends how you look at it; if you want to be "ordinary", then yes, it's a "handicap". If you want to be extraordinary, then not necessarily so.

As I once told a non-Autistic friend on Facebook, it doesn't matter if the grass is greener on your side or the other guy's, what matters is what you do with it.


As someone who's developed enough of a social life by just being myself over the years, I can certainly tell you it's not everything that it's been built up to be.

I assure you if you ever do get it, you'll enjoy the buzz for a while, but you'll soon regret your decision to pursue a social life rather than living your life to the fullest.

I no longer "pursue" a social life; I keep people in my life, spend time with them here and there, and that's it. I'm telling you: as an Autistic person, you'll find it far more boring than you could possibly realize.

Socializing is basically talking about random $#!+ that everyone pretends to care about, but practically no one really bothers to put any actual interest in...except for maybe you. You might even resent it after a while.

I'm not going to read through all the posts so I don't know if it's been said, but that dark black hole is depression, not autism. I'm aware that I'll never be normal, and I'll never have a lot of things an NT has, but I'm happy with who I am, and I also realize a lot of NT's suffer debilitating things like depression which keeps them from having all of what you said sometimes, too. I'm 27, had to move back home after making it for 3 years in my own place, and as much as it sucks having to live with people I don't want to live with, I make the most of it, there's no point fretting over what you can't change.

The key is to stop wishing you were someone else, and just live your own life........Stop comparing yourself to other people. Decide what you would like to do for yourself and go after it.....

Not all aspies are housebound and require assistance with life.....some of us are able to get out into the world and make do the best we can. Its not easy for us, but its also not easy for some NT's - Money struggles, can't hold a job , relationship issues etc are not exclusive to aspies.

I had an official dx a few months ago, and it made me feel so much better about my life -I'd had depressive episodes where I'd lament my inability to fit into the world, and thought there was just something wrong with me. Now I know that I'm aspie, I am trying to come to terms with the way I am, and stop forcing myself to do things that I just won't be able to do.

The worst thing for me is the fake act that I have to put on every day......Its very very tiring and keeps me quite anxious.

So aspergers/autism is worse than blindness?

p.s.i thought aspergers makes someone in their own world,preferring in generally(not totally)being alone and having few friends and a relationship.By some things i have read in here i learned that aspergers is a form of depression that someone has because they don't have friends or they make fun of him or they don't know how to make friends.

Um, no, it isn't.

http://www.autreat.com/dsm4-aspergers.html

http://www.allaboutdepression.com/dia_03.html#1

Well, let's just put it this way. Do you agree that schizophrenia is a mental illness or handicap, or just something that makes you "different but not sick"?