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Is there a way to make friends on wrong planet?

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OJani
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25 Jul 2012, 3:26 am

Surfman wrote:
Dillogic wrote:
People here are going to be mentally ill to some extent (socially in the least), which is the complete opposite that someone with an ASD needs; people with ASDs generally need stability in regards to friends and whatnot, and others with such [or some other mental disorder] aren't the most stable people around.

So, "outlook not so good", in other words.


by your logic then... WP is a harmful place for aspies? hmmmm

expressing angst in an appropriate forum space, or discoursing friendship dynamics, is bad?

When I mention here that communication between people on the spectrum can be just as difficult and faulty as between NTs and autistics I always get ignored or disagreed with.



Surfman
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25 Jul 2012, 5:38 am

OJani wrote:
When I mention here that communication between people on the spectrum can be just as difficult and faulty as between NTs and autistics I always get ignored or disagreed with.


Its difficult for a lot of members here to look at themselves in an honest manner

Your an engineer, Ojani? me too

Its funny, at the beach I make friends with strangers all the time.... back in the city and my home area - I dont even try[till lately]...

initially on WP I tried to make friends....... found the online friend experience disappointing [for me]and have now resigned myself to IRL only

recently I've been chatting up some strangers in the city.... and had some success regarding meaningful connections and shared moments

aspies need loving too!!

Image



Cfroi
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25 Jul 2012, 12:59 pm

Hi there, I am William. I wanna to make friends on the Internet too, to chat when bored and find someone who really have similar feeling.

I myself have long time ago attended psychology doctor diagnosis, suspicious of depression. But the final result is that, I am actually normal, but with syndromes of aspirers. I guess this is why I feel negative and behaves shyly and have tendency to avoid mass social activities.
I have a younger brother, who I think he should have tendency to asperger/asperger. This is based on his act of closing himself up frequently due to very mild issue.

My father seem to have asperger too since he could never have proper conversation with others. I would say, never a complete sentence could be formed properly. And, he truly has no friend. But something that I appreciated him is that, he never feel lonely for living in at extremely isolated world.

I am living in a country which psycho problem are not widely accepted. So, I never told others even for my meeting with psycho doctor. And, I was trying very hard to seek help from google and finally reach this place. Glad to find this world!


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William
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My NT score: 35%
You are sort of neurotypical but shows signs of autism. You probably enjoy intellectual activities more than socializing or maybe you enjoy socializing, but you aren't genius at it. You could be autistic, but may not be.


Delphiki
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25 Jul 2012, 1:01 pm

Dillogic wrote:
People here are going to be mentally ill to some extent (socially in the least), which is the complete opposite that someone with an ASD needs; people with ASDs generally need stability in regards to friends and whatnot, and others with such [or some other mental disorder] aren't the most stable people around.
Autism doesn't make someone mentally unstable. I am close friends with someone because of this site.


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hartzofspace
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25 Jul 2012, 4:38 pm

Cfroi wrote:
Hi there, I am William. I wanna to make friends on the Internet too, to chat when bored and find someone who really have similar feeling.

I myself have long time ago attended psychology doctor diagnosis, suspicious of depression. But the final result is that, I am actually normal, but with syndromes of aspirers. I guess this is why I feel negative and behaves shyly and have tendency to avoid mass social activities.
I have a younger brother, who I think he should have tendency to asperger/asperger. This is based on his act of closing himself up frequently due to very mild issue.

My father seem to have asperger too since he could never have proper conversation with others. I would say, never a complete sentence could be formed properly. And, he truly has no friend. But something that I appreciated him is that, he never feel lonely for living in at extremely isolated world.

I am living in a country which psycho problem are not widely accepted. So, I never told others even for my meeting with psycho doctor. And, I was trying very hard to seek help from google and finally reach this place. Glad to find this world!

Welcome to WP! :)


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Surfman
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25 Jul 2012, 5:18 pm

IRL I can tell if someone is disliking or turning on me, whereas here on WP, I cant pick my friends and enemies nearly as well.

I could be spending time discussing matters, with others on a thread, only to realize, they:

may dislike me
may dislike many people
may be naturally disagreeable and possible even hostile in their aspie nature
may be emotionally clumsy[unaware, aware and on porpoise], inadvertently hurtful to others by their present state of mind
.....

this may then set up a dynamic, from whence I distrust others who come as genuine kind and caring friends, causing:

me to shun their kindly approaches, thus infecting them with MY FEARS gained from previous WP hurts.......

And, as past hurts are a common theme amongst most WP members, these scenarios are likely to be replicated in other members WP experiences....



However, these experiences may provide users with an opportunity, to grow as a human being, to bring forth a positive air, to shine a positive light, to be a breath of fresh air....

To get shat on by mean bored members looking for someone to diss



Dillogic
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25 Jul 2012, 5:47 pm

Delphiki wrote:
Autism doesn't make someone mentally unstable. I am close friends with someone because of this site.


Emotional dysregulation is common amongst those with ASDs, as is black and white thinking and a desire for order and routine; all of which require stability to minimize their severity. I'm sure there's lots of nice people here who make good friends (I know one person from here who's as nice as anyone I've seen).



Cfroi
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25 Jul 2012, 8:11 pm

hartzofspace wrote:
Cfroi wrote:
Hi there, I am William. I wanna to make friends on the Internet too, to chat when bored and find someone who really have similar feeling.

I am living in a country which psycho problem are not widely accepted. So, I never told others even for my meeting with psycho doctor. And, I was trying very hard to seek help from google and finally reach this place. Glad to find this world!

Welcome to WP! :)

8) 8)


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William
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You are sort of neurotypical but shows signs of autism. You probably enjoy intellectual activities more than socializing or maybe you enjoy socializing, but you aren't genius at it. You could be autistic, but may not be.


bizboy1
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25 Jul 2012, 8:15 pm

Honestly, no. We're Autistic. We can't even make friends online.


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horsegurl4190
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25 Jul 2012, 8:30 pm

Hi I would love to chat over the internet. Do you have Facebook? I could friend you and chat with you that way as well.



Cfroi
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25 Jul 2012, 8:37 pm

Hi, mine is [email protected]
Facebook and msn are both ok.
Honestly, I have no confidence in long term friendship


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William
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My NT score: 35%
You are sort of neurotypical but shows signs of autism. You probably enjoy intellectual activities more than socializing or maybe you enjoy socializing, but you aren't genius at it. You could be autistic, but may not be.


Delphiki
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25 Jul 2012, 11:11 pm

bizboy1 wrote:
Honestly, no. We're Autistic. We can't even make friends online.
That is an absolute statement, so all it takes is one person, such as me, to prove that wrong. I am really good friends with someone I met online.


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Quantum_Immortal
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26 Jul 2012, 1:44 pm

hartzofspace wrote:
AdmiralCrunch wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
What does major tickets mean?


I've noticed that most men on the spectrum are both aggressive towards and completely incompetent at interacting with the women that they are interested in. This defeats the standard canard of us not having enough "confidence"; in fact, I'd call it too much.

The result is that many of the women on forums like this feel overwhelmed by negative attention from the men, as though the women are front-row tickets to a major music concert. This is hurtful to the women as they feel intimidated and undervalued as a legitimate member of the community.

Thus, many women might not respond to personal messages, even to other women. So, please don't feel shunned if many of the people you PM don't get back to you; they may just not be comfortable with you yet.

I have to agree with you here! I have received messages from men who wanted me to send them pics of my naked body but weren't interested in getting to know me as a person, with the result that I am sometimes leery of responding to personal messages from males. I have also had someone contact me in a friendly fashion but who then backed off when I mentioned my fiance.


O_O and i thought i was bad. You should have send them goetse.



hartzofspace
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26 Jul 2012, 1:53 pm

Quantum_Immortal wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
AdmiralCrunch wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
What does major tickets mean?


I've noticed that most men on the spectrum are both aggressive towards and completely incompetent at interacting with the women that they are interested in. This defeats the standard canard of us not having enough "confidence"; in fact, I'd call it too much.

The result is that many of the women on forums like this feel overwhelmed by negative attention from the men, as though the women are front-row tickets to a major music concert. This is hurtful to the women as they feel intimidated and undervalued as a legitimate member of the community.

Thus, many women might not respond to personal messages, even to other women. So, please don't feel shunned if many of the people you PM don't get back to you; they may just not be comfortable with you yet.

I have to agree with you here! I have received messages from men who wanted me to send them pics of my naked body but weren't interested in getting to know me as a person, with the result that I am sometimes leery of responding to personal messages from males. I have also had someone contact me in a friendly fashion but who then backed off when I mentioned my fiance.


O_O and i thought i was bad. You should have send them goetse.

Sent them what? :?


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Quantum_Immortal
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26 Jul 2012, 2:20 pm

Yea ok, i admit i was childish in the previous post.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goatse.cx



AdmiralCrunch
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26 Jul 2012, 2:28 pm

Quantum_Immortal wrote:
Yea ok, i admit i was childish in the previous post.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goatse.cx



DO NOT CLICK THAT! 8O


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