Neurotypicals are too sensitive?

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From my experience I would say

NT's are insensitive where Aspies are sensitive
and sensitive where Aspies are not. It's like
our positives are their negatives and vice versa.

There might be times that I appear to be socially insensitive when I share my opinions on the hotter WP topics. The opposite is the true when I post those strong opinions.

I don't know what people are talking about with this over sensitive stuff and derailment something. I do know that autistic people aren't as socially perceptive as nts, so from my perspective, nts are socially perceptive and sensitive to social issues that I consider minor or don't think of at all. This is part of the fundamental difference between autistics and nts. I lack social cognition, so much so that I can't even understand this thread.

So how is the correct amount of sensitivity determined? If someone tells me I'm "over-sensitive", is it not also possible that they are "under-sensitive"? The whole concept presupposes that there is some kind of way to determine the correct amount of sensitivity people ought to have in a situation. Who gets to decide how sensitive other people are allowed to be, and why?

I guess if someone wants to make a post about people being too sensitive, they should provide an example or some example so people know what they are talking about. Sensitive is such a broad word, people will interpret it differently. Some will interpret it as the person wanting to bully and verbally abuse others and harass them and insult them, others (such as me) will interpret it as us saying our opinion or asking a question or telling a joke or answering a question honestly, and others may interpret it as declining an invite, not wanting to go somewhere, not giving someone a gift because you didn't have the money or don't like to Christmas shop, not sending out a greeting card because you don't do those, not eating a food at a party someone made, and other social things.

Well, "too sensitive" is of course relative to whatever you consider to be a reasonable amount of sensitivity so it can be difficult to analyse exactly what you mean.

The main thing in the original post that got me thinking was the comment to grow a pair (which I know you were being jocoserious about but it kind of goes along with what you were saying, don't discount my argument because I am using the phrase, see my last paragraph), which implies that an alpha male (who assumably has the proverbial pair) would not be sensitive to criticism? I would say yes and no, I imagine that the alpha male would not mind dissent as long as he maintained his position as the dominant social figure. So, while the alpha male may not care when someone says that they don't like him, it is only because the alpha male holds a higher social position that him and it is inconsequential.

All I am really saying is that if everyone steps on you and it does not bother you it is probably bad for you reproductively speaking in the long run. I have a friend who is 100% AS and in middle school everyone in the school would treat him like sh*t but he did not care at all, it was/is good that he did not have to feel the pain of social rejection but as a result of that social rejection he was unable to reek the benefits that social connections would allow such as networking and getting a girlfriend. Had he been more sensitive he would have consequentially been less apathetic in regard to social connections and would have worked to better his social status.

Sensitivity plays an important role in social interactions, it is good to not have too much (social anxiety type disorder, which it is important to mention that some specrumites have) and not have too little (which some other specrumites have).

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Just found this surprisingly relevant quote while reading:

"Caring about what the men around you think of you is a show of respect, and conversely, not caring what other men think of you is a sign of disrespect. In a survival band, it is tactically advantageous to maintain a reputation for being strong, courageous and masterful as a group. A man who does not care for his own reputation makes his team look weak by association. Dishonor and disregard for honor are dangerous for a survival band or a fighting team because the appearance of weakness invites attack.” ~ Jack Donovan, The Way of Men

Last edited by suboc-1 on 30 Dec 2012, 6:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm not talking about their expressions, I'm talking about their actual emotions. I can have a casual debate with an aspie, but I can't with a neurotypical.

If I give an ounce of criticism - with a kind tone of voice and me constantly saying "I'm not trying to insult you man, I'm trying to help you get better" - they automatically take it as me trying to discourage them.

They can't handle my differing opinions about topics and feel the need to insult me and go cry about it. They say "keep it to yourself" but then spew their objectively nonsensical BS

They are too easily annoyed by hyper people and differing personalities - I mean, for love of crap, they're just being themselves, you moronic bigots. If you don't like their personality, be kind to them and try to stay away from them without being mean about it - don't bully them.

have to agree, NT people can't take criticism. they can however, pretend you're talking about someone else.
they often find talking about issues with emotional context, very difficult, but they can easily talk about another person with the same issue much more readily, or try to fix that third person.

from my experience, if it's something they want to hear, it's all about satisfying some etheric emotional context rather than the content itself.

in a casual conversation, you can address issues, answer questions, and provide a back and forth. When they have a subtext that you can't work out, it's not becoming evident, or they start berating you, then it's probably a trigger issue they have that you're just not going to work out. they can be oversensitive, especially if it's an emotionally connected event or issue.

if you want to try to have a conjectural conversation with an NT person, wrap the issue around a martyr or a different kind of person. use juxtaposition and conjectural examples.

this is also part of the socratic method, but it helps with "detaching" emotional context. and reattaching it so something or someone else.

swap a "disgraced radio personalities" with a confessional priest.
"when that confessional priest called that nurse, i'm sure she was feeling isolated and alone before she was berated by the hospital staff, the priest wasn't the trigger for her suicide"

swap "your slightly overweight friend" with "jean claude van damme"
"well, jean claude van damme loves donuts. but its because he finds eating kind of comfortable, right ?"

it really depends. some people need a third party just to comprehend that they are not alone in being confused or alone, or to trust in a statement of fact or accuracy. this obviously is a logical trapping, but NT people trust the positive experience of "others" rather than your opinion exclusively.

there's others too.