What are some common social cues that you don't catch?

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This thread is weird.
I can't answer your question.
How am I supposed to know which social cues I don't get, if I miss them?

I guess it is ones that people have made comment to you about

I only know that I know nothing.

Fraud means wrongful or criminal deception intended to result in financial or personal gain. Can you prove these allegations?

Let's say we were all wrongfully diagnosed even if it was fraud. This then begs the question of the reliability and validity of the diagnosis tools used to diagnosis. If we have to call these things into question then we have to call into question those who created these tests and their field. This makes me question then is psychiatry and psychology reliable and valid?

Are there objective tests that can be used to detect the presence or absence of autism or aspergers? If there are not shouldn't there be?

I did take the tests and I do have a diagnosis by what is considered a professional. I do have a form of autism.

I have another hypothesis as well.

What if there are more people on the spectrum than previously thought. What if HFA is more common than thought? Let's say that it is. There is a current model of human development that is ingrained into our society. Part of it is the discipline model. It is said that children today have many behavior problems. What if they are not behavior problems but developmental issues?

What if children are assumed to know more than they really do? Why are professionals so itching to get rid of the aspergers diagnois so quickly? Could it be because it would overthrow established beliefs that are intricately part of our society? People were taught a certain way and that certain things were true. How would it impact a person's psyche if all of a sudden the truths they thought were true were really not?

Last edited by cubedemon6073 on 14 Mar 2013, 9:42 am, edited 3 times in total.

I must have missed this fad

People never tell me if what I do is right or wrong.

I've been told I go on and on about the same thing. Beating a dead horse, as they say.
My husband pointed out that I respond to rhetorical questions.

Change what my husband pointed out to me to what my mum pointed out to me husband trying to leave room to mum trying to leave the room and this is me and I'm exactly the same.

I agree. I only kno I have done something wrong when I can see things go wrong. Angry reactions. Getting laughed at. Etc. Then I hav to waste my mental and emotional energy analyzing the situation and dissecting it. Sometimes I figure it out, but a lot of times I'm still clueless and just hate people even more.

Well sometimes people laugh or get angry and I do spend the time working them out and then I feel like sh*t but a lot of these things are pointed out to me by my mum and psychologist. Then I know what they are but I still don't know how to recognize them. For example I've been told I speak at the wrong times when people are just pausing but want to keep talking but I still can't tell when people are pausing or when they're done talking and I can speak. Or my mum says that I give "too much information" and sometimes I try to give less but I don't know how much is just the right amount of information and usually when I try to describe something in less detail it just takes me a painfully long time.

Until I came here, I had very minimal knowledge of Aspergers and was shocked to find it is basically a form of Autism. I've never known anyone in real life to admit to Aspergers or Autism before I came here although I see examples of it all the time. Just about everyone I talk to knows little to nothing about Autism and nobody, even experts seem to know what 'Autistic Spectrum' means. Strange fad besides why would anyone WANT to admit they have Aspergers. I accept it but I'm not proud or ashamed it just is what it is.


I know in my case even though I'm well liked and considered a very sportsmanlike athlete by most (albeit with a nasty temper) I have been accused of cheating, playing dirty, being underhanded, greasy, you name it so many times I've lost count. I still to this day cannot figure out why anyone would say that when I go so far as to check the rulebook mid-game if I'm not sure I broke a rule or not. I'm sure this is one of the many social cues I am still oblivious to.

My husband told me I don't recognize being hit on so he knows he can trust me but he gets jealous. He told me I didn't even know he was hitting on me when we first met and he could just tell I wasn't picking up on it so that was a red flag for him I was different. he knew I wasn't ignoring him intentionally or else I wouldn't be talking to him and walking with him.

I will also treat situations the same. Like when Mom and I go to a bookstore, we go our separate ways and do our own thing. When my husband I went to Borders, I go and do my own thing leaving him there and he just ignored it and also knew something was up with me. He has to point out to me something was okay that one time but it's not okay in every single situation. Being aware of this issue I have, I don't argue about it and not assume I am being picked on and singled out nor think that he is being unreasonable.

Through other people commenting on it, or me pondering it with 15 years of experience in intentionally analyzing and reading people. Obviously I'm not catching EVERY missed cue, but when things go wrong I try to figure out where they did.

Like a guy is talking to me, then he asks why do you wear a ring and I say I'm married and then he instantly breaks off and leaves.........yea I'm pretty sure that was a missed cue there. Or I've had people tell me that chick was totally hitting on you, or even after a mess of an interaction I'll sometimes plain out ask the person WHY?

Interesting hypothesis.

My own grand theory is that:

..... aspergers is completely overlooked in addiction, and that the results of research into anorexia if done with a high percentage of addicts will show that they have got undiagnosed aspergers/autism/NVLDs.

People could be diagnosed when they receive treatment, but don't, for the reason that specialists in aspergers and autism, don't work in rehabs or general mental health centres ... plus funding etc..

This ends up making some people really hard to reach and group interventions quasi impossible...

But wouldn't it make it difficult for society to blame them if it were true?

Who knows?

and my social cue that I apparently dont always catch

... going off on tangents, and monologueing about my areas of special interest...

Last edited by shubunkin on 14 Mar 2013, 2:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It gets pointed out to you by people such as therapists or your family or partner or a good friend.

You also notice it's okay for others to do something but when you do it, people make a fuss about it and act like you did something wrong. If you are unaware you don't pick up on social cues, this will be your perspective and you think people treat you different and single you out. But if you have been made aware by someone you don't pick up on social cues, then you start realizing from others you don't pick up on them because whenever you do what others do, it's a problem so you assume it's a social cue you missed. Then you are confused because you don't know when it's okay to do something like when is it okay to hug someone? You see people do it but whenever you do it, people don't like it. What's wrong here? So you know this is a social cue you miss and don't understand so you're better off not hugging people unless they initiate it.

i've watched videos of women being attracted to men, and honestly it was so subtle that it sailed totally over my head. i might as well have been watching the mating rituals of martians.