This guy should be our king.

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Yes. While I personally prefer written communication, I realize that it is'nt always the "best tool for the job", and that my "toolbox" of communication tools can always be better.

Verbal communication means you can say your message, whether it is understood by the reciever.....not always so easy to predict. If you properly transmitted your message, it really comes down to if the receiver wants to hear it.

Yes, you can, but when you make a statement that presents something as a fact... we can ask you for your sources... Otherwise, it will be regarded as supposition, like it is now.


Your words indicate differently


It was not what was said, but your word choice. It came across as rude, combative, dismissive and disrespectful.


Winner? My world? I am sorry to break it to you... we live in the same world. There are no winners, no losers... just people


Really? Really? I believe that you are projecting here... You are allowed to have your opinion, but it stops being just an opinion when you try to tell others what we think... "Either you think being NT is a good thing or you don't." Ironically enough... I don't think either of those things... So don't presume to know how we think...

The reason the goalposts seem to move is because you have one goal and are not willing to, even for a moment, consider another mode of thought, point of view, cognition or mode of perception... You have your goal... which is set... I don't know what it is, and I don't care to know... But the goals change constantly because that is how self aware creatures, even Aspies operate. Right this second, my goal is to communicate my perceptions with you, and it just changed because you have decided that anything that is not a 100% parroting of your own thoughts is wrong.

As it has been said, "What we have here is a failure to communicate." You claimed to have all the communication skills you needed... I posit that this may not be the case... You have not succeeded in this room - which I am sure you have chalked up to our problems... not yours... but if you find yourself not being understood in most situations, even amongst your own... then I suggest an inventory is in order... or you can do what you did when you read that statement and stay the course.

For the record... verbal communication skills have little to do with cognitive function and mental acuity. Some of the dumbest NTs I know... people who are barely able to tie their own shoes and cannot do simple math (addition and subtraction) without a calculator... people who, if tested would sit right above the mentally impared line and in some cases below it... will be able to talk and talk and talk for hours and be understood... This evidence is anecdotal, but since you are not willing to provide citations for your statements presented as fact... neither am I.

Well it has always puzzled me tbh why people who can talk for hours in bars and entertain people with endless anecdotes and make friends easily via being able to converse so entertainingly also seem to really f-k their lives up ie I see being able to talk fluently and coherently ie to get people onside, liking you etc as a sign of a sharp, intelligent mind so it makes no sense for such people to then be no good at running their lives

So you may well have a point about one thing not following on from the other. It doesn't seem logical though, as to talk coherently and well enough to get people onside you need to be skillfull in terms of quickly thinking what to say next, how to say it etc ie it's a skill set I lack completely and yet I bet my life is more on track than many of these people in terms of no debt, no criminal record, generally reliable etc etc

What others can do that I can't, I often elevate as a sign of higher intelligence

Nessa: no offense, but I didn't read your response. You have made WILD leaps of irrationality and and drawn incorrect conclusions and inferred meaning behind my words that I did not mean, imply or even think.

It is is obvious to me that we do not have a common frame of reference for communication. Rather than engaging in communication that will end in anger and/or cognitive dissonance for one or both parties... I prefer to engage my energies elsewhere...

Thank you for your time.

Well that says it all

I still urge you to work on your communication skills. I can assure you, your life her and elsewhere would benefit from it

Premised on the fact that you can't be bothered to read my posts?

If you lack the capacity to understand the points I'm making I'm sorry

Most people seem to have no problem - it's not been an issue until now

Not at all... After siftin through your posts all over WP... I see this same problem is prevalent in almost every thread you comment in.

I can sum it up with one thing you have said. "If you lack the capacity to understand the points I am making"

That is your attitude across the board. And when people misconstrue your intent due to snarky wording, offensive wording or just downright obnoxious tendencies, you become defensive.

The reason that I wanted to end this dialogue is not that I don't understand your points or your point of view, but that 25 years ago... I was JUST like that... and I learned that if I wanted to have my words listened to and not just tossed aside, I had develop communications skills...

You call it NT-ness, but you are demonstrating a desire to be understood, which is a human trait... THEREFORE, it falls upon YOU (The communicator) to make YOURSELF understood. Failure to do that does not reflect on the people you are talking to, but on you.

The reason I am not going to be bothering to read your posts anymore is because you have outright stated that you have no desire to better yourself in this particular skillset... Since this a message board - and the primary purpose of message boards is to communicate ideas - that means you have no desire to actually engage and improve in what this board is about. SO... that means either a) you are as arrogant as I once was and expect everyone to be able to suss out what it is you are trying to say, which is selfish, irrational and not at all realistic, or b) you simply wish to engage in Look-At-Me behaviors...

Either way, I have enough going on in my life with my many many many projects that I don't have time for unwilling to communicate effectively arrogance or or L.A.M. behavior... Especially since I know how badly I react to irrationality as has been displayed here.

In the future, I will give you the respect to not comment and let you maintain your position... but please do me the same respect. I have no wish to engage at this point.

Now... you have the entirety of what I was trying to say... misconstrue as you will... It matters not in the grand scheme of things.

Putting the thread OFFICIALLY back on the rails...

This guy has made some good points, so did the woman in the other video...

We can't the NT's responsible really... They can only view reality, like us, through the warped lens of their own experiences...

That being said... I do not believe that we should have a monarchy... a skillset cross-referenced to preferences based meritocracy seems the best ruling model for aspies

Fascinating, you appear to be just like my brother. So I will have to leave it at that...

I think we should take into account that the OP (Stoek) has a well known tendanacy to exgerate in his postings. I don't think he literally meant a monarchy. There is no Iron Throne of RightPlanet.

All individuals, Aspie, non-Aspie, Daughters of Dragon-Lords, we all view reality through the "warped lens of [our] own experiences". Or, as I prefer to refer to it, "The Crooked Timber of Humanity".

I do wonder if videos of the sort referenced above, and videos of the type that ASAN puts out, are an effective communication tool outside of the Neurodiversity movement. I would think so, but I'm not aware of any hard evidence on the issue.

To quote Feraluce:-

"it falls upon YOU (The communicator) to make YOURSELF understood. Failure to do that does not reflect on the people you are talking to, but on you."

"There is no Iron Throne of RightPlanet."

You could have fooled me!

Many seem to consider themselves contenders for it!

Oh, I agree, I was speaking in hyperbole... I do think that, if we did go with a monarchy, that guy should totally be our minister of foreign policy.

Well, I'd assume any organization needs a spokesperson, right?

Absolutely... I was going to hire James Cameron to make us all look like superheros.