My diagnosis has ruined my life

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if your diagnosis is being a burden then throw it away. It's not as important if you were misdiagnosed or not, aspergers is not a disease anyway. If for instance you are in a social situation and think for yourself "I'm an aspie I can't do it" or if you are trying to break your limits people say "she/he can't do it, she/he has aspergers" then it's just getting in your way. Get rid of it and be free.

Whether you have autism, aspergers, or not, what kind of services have helped you?

I think many aspies struggle with self-advocacy- between family, friends, and the people they interact with (this includes teachers, administrators, bosses, therapists, coaches, you name it). Stand up for what you believe in- if you believe your diagnosis was wrong, correct it. But in the event that it's not wrong, correct the treatment and don't let it hold you back.

EsotericResearch hit the nail on the head here, though I fall on the other side of the reality. While it may be true that education programs for those on the spectrum have been improving in the past ten years, many programs still marginalize people. I was only diagnosed six months back at age 30, and this was seen as the major core of my 'revival'. I do worry about many people going through these educational systems that put all the students with whatever learning profile they have into one box.

Best advice that I ever got: stay positive and live in the here and now.

I've read a lot of your posts here DevilKisses and this is what really throws up a red flag to me more than anything else:

1. The symptoms manifested after having a physical illness. That is not indicative of autism.

2. Mom went from doctor to doctor to get a diagnosis, and many refused. That in an of itself doesn't necessarily rule out the validity of a diagnosis. It can go either way. Some people have to keep seeing multiple doctors to finally get a correct diagnosis. Some people also go to multiple doctors to get the diagnosis they prefer whether it is correct or not. What makes it questionable, is that she did it to receive funding.

3. Symptoms going away is an excellent reason to be reevaluated. This is not like recovering from the flu where you just say, okay I'm better now, and you don't need a doctor to confirm that. An AS/ASD diagnosis can have serious implications later on. It could affect your ability to get a job or to get health insurance. If had a diagnosis on record, and I felt it was incorrect I would want to update my medical records to reflect that.

In addition, if the diagnosis has indeed been incorrect all along, you may want some support in coming to terms with that. It sounds like it has hurt you, whether it is correct or not. The question would be whether it has hurt you because it is the wrong diagnosis, or if it is correct and you were harmed because people treated you poorly because of it. Either way, if it has impacted you negatively that needs to be addressed in some way.

Really? What kind of implications? Like, legal implications? Do I have to show an employer I have it? Now I'm scared Is it better not to get an official diagnosis then, since my case in mild?

Sorry I didn't mean to scare anyone. What I am saying is that employers try to exclude people who might not be able to perform a job well. If they think that having a certain condition could prevent you from doing the job, they may ask if you have it. In the US they are not allowed to ask those questions during the interview process, but they can ask after they make you a job offer. Then they can make hiring conditional on you answering certain medical questions, or disclosing your medical records, or having an examination. I am not sure what kinds of jobs might exclude people with ASD's. I don't think it would matter for most ordinary jobs.

Theoretically an employer can't exclude you or discriminate against you for having a disability, as long as you are able to do the job, but in reality it doesn't always work that way.

It depends on where you live and what kind of services are available but having a diagnosis could help you with job placement. On the other hand, if the diagnosis is wrong, it could be an unnecessary liability.

I tested as having asynchronous development as well. I was beyond my years in areas such as moral development with a high level of intellectual ability but also emotionally immature, over sensitive and too idealistic. I even started school early due to my level of brightness and was labelled as exceptionally bright and extremely intelligent by schools and colleges I attended. All the same I failed my mainstream education due to bullying as I have very bad problems socialising and fitting in. I eventually got my qualifications from college after I left school and went on to University for a while (where I still had problems fitting in).

I too got on well with children many years my senior and also adults. In fact i could socialise with adults as a child even though I couldn't get along with my same age peers. But I was seen as that adorable little kid with the quirky personality, who collected bank forms instead of playing with dolls, who nattered on and on about things that fascinated me or things I was curious about and whom had a overly large vocabulary for my age.

The therapist I saw today (a different therapist to the last one I saw (whom will now be my regular therapist) seems to think I have Asperger's (her suggestion, not mine, I just told her about my social problems and what I think and feel) rather than social anxiety as did a support worker I had for several years a few years ago.

I did point out to my therapist I was not sure about Asperger's when she asked me how I felt about her suspicion (which is not the same as an official diagnosis I know but I want to see where she is going with this all the same) that I didn't think I had it due to not haveing many of the learning disabilities associated with it or functioning issues (I am capable of cooking a meal, getting my house work done when I can get my mind off my beloved hobbies, dressing myself, organising myself (when I can get my mind off my beloved hobbies) and so on. She just said it was a spectrum and not having certain learning disabilities does not rule the disorder out.

We will see. I mostly mention my learning ability as it was, at one point, my strongest argument against having an ASD. Or I thought it was. I am very functional for someone on the spectrum (when I can get my mind off my beloved hobbies...I do get distracted by them, I can be naughty as I spend far too much time entertaining them ). Than again maybe I am thinking along the lines of stereotypes.

I may not have an ASD at all, it may be a personality disorder or similar or a combination of things although it looks like social anxiety might be off the list. She said my social issues are not anxiety based as the symptoms don't fit.

Hope you get answers.

I have been through more evaluations than I can count since first grade. Even in kindergarten I had issues, but nothing was done. My grandmother told me that my teachers told her and my mother that I was going to have problems in school. My mother denied it, saying my grandmother was lying. I missed the year after kindergarten because we did not live in the city schools jurisdiction, and the school my parents wanted me to attend was less than a mile from our home. As it was at the time, I would have to ride the bus to a school farther away, but my parents did not want that. Therefore, they kept me out for a year. During that time, I learned to read and learned basic math, but I was grossly deficit in social skills. I did not know how to play with kids, even in kindergarten I felt strangely out of place and I probably acted up--I don't remember much now since that was over 50 years ago and my teachers are now dead. What little I remember about first grade, I was also disruptive and didn't know how to act with the other kids. The truth is, no one knew what was wrong with me. All my parents did was deny, deny, deny. They were angry when they had to take me to these appointments, saying if I would just behave myself, it wouldn't be necessary. When I asked why I had to see all these doctors, no one told me anything. My parents said they didn't know--it was the school that wanted me to see them. All they knew how to do was lie and deny. When I asked my mother why they lied to me, she offered no explanation.

I have been diagnosed with Major Depression, Schizoid Personality Disorder, Avoidant Personality Disorder, Simple Schizophrenia, and Residual Schizophrenia. A pediatric neurologist in Atlanta said that I had "some peculiar neurological and emotional disturbance", and that I was "very odd".

Several years ago, when I was transferring my records to my current doctor, my mother read my file. She laughed at and made fun of my psychological reports, calling them a load of bull. What she does not realize is that doctors and teachers are trained to recognize disturbing behavior in children. Any child that does not get along with his/her peers, does not want to participate in extracurricular activities, and who prefers to be alone is not normal and needs to be evaluated. On my last visit, I told my doctor how much this bothered me. He said that he tried to tell my mother that I had serious issues, but that she just didn't understand--I don't think she wanted to. When I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome, she told me she didn't want to hear about it.

In later years, during my college and technical school years, my teachers suspected something was wrong with me when I could not find suitable employment. When they saw how I interacted with my peers, they told me that unless I got some type of treatment or intervention, I would never get a job in my field of study. And they were right--I never got a job in my field of study. I have been fired from every job I have ever held since 1991. Every time I tried to get help, my mother stood in the way, saying I didn't need treatment. What was she thinking? The three times I tried to commit suicide, including my first one in 1978 while I was in college, I received no treatment or counseling. Why? Were my parents really trying to sabotage my life? Why did they not want anything done? My mother told me that psychologists and psychiatrists were not real doctors--but were quacks.

Years of therapy have failed to help me become employable. I am beginning to have doubts about psychiatry--first of all, because it is not an exact science. There are no medical tests to diagnose mental illness--X-Ray, blood tests, MRI, etc. It seems like using the DSM Manual to group behaviors and then guessing a diagnosis. I may be wrong, but that's the impression I get. I wish that I could just be a regular person and not need psychiatric drugs. These various diagnoses have ruined my life.

I don't know where to turn or what to do. True, the medicines keep me stable, but that's about it. I want to feel good about myself. I am a complete social outcast. No one ever calls me or comes to see me. I want to get a seasonal job, but I don't know based on my work history.

Anyone out there have any ideas?

DevilKisses, have you heard of PANDAS or PANS? Here is a link:

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publicat ... ndex.shtml

It's an immunologic reaction to Streptococcus bacteria that triggers acute and sudden onset of OCD and tic disorders in some children.

I really wish for your sake you could stop obsessing about this.

And Devilskisses when you write the way you are writing It seems almost like prejudice such as you describe against individuals who are on the spectrum is natural and normal. I understand your frustration level is high, and I am sure it's not your intention to say that when it happens to others who are on the spectrum, that's somehow ok. But just my opinion the problem if you're treated poorly or not challenged that should be addressed is that people on the spectrum deserve a chance.

This is an old thread.

I saw a new entry and assumed a new thread. Interesting how social we really are!

Thanks Dianthus!!