sometimes i feel jealous/ left out in the aspergers category

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Don't let the long-windedness of some posts fool you. It's not necessarily because they're smarter than you. A lot of times it's just people who start out by trying to make a simple point, they add additional thoughts, and before they know it they have a 10-paragraph essay. I'm not disqualifying long and complicated posts; many are very informative, but sometimes you can say more with less.

I was diagnosed with ADD back in the 80s, long before Asperger's was even a recognized condition. My symptoms are closer to Asperger's than ADD (though there's no doubt I have both).

I'm far from a ''genius with a nerdy attitude''. I am not a genius and I am not a nerd. The things I am good at I am really average at, and the things I am average at I am really below average at (I am comparing that to the average IQ).

I'm more of an ''introvert with a nervous attitude''. I crave social interaction, but at the same time I feel afraid of people. I don't mean it personally, as a lot of people are really nice, but I still feel somewhat afraid. I think it's because I don't trust myself, and worry that I might say or do some stupid things and then spend the rest of my life regretting it. I did something really, really stupid when I was a teenager at school, something what was not usually something I would want to do, and I'm still beating myself up about it today whenever I think about it.

I'm much the same way in that regard.

The last time I took an IQ test, which was waaaay back in 5th grade, apparently I scored 125. Do I really feel smart though? While I have this uncanny ability to memorize all sorts of random trivia, and a seemingly-natural knack for working with computers and other technology, the truth is that I am no genius. I actually have a hard time understanding many mathematical and scientific concepts, especially since many of them don't seem to be grounded in reality. People say that these subjects are supposed to be "logical", but in reality, they can actually be quite abstract.

To this day, I am amazed that I was able to pass 11th grade chemistry, despite not understanding half of what we had covered in that course. I took a lot of notes however, and we were all allowed to basically turn our reference sheets into personalized cheatsheets for tests, so that probably helped me a lot.

As for physics, I've always hated it, from the time we first covered it in my elementary school science classes, to the last time I glanced at a high school-level physics textbook. There's just too much math, and too many formulas, and a lot of the principles seem to contradict what I actually see with my own eyes. Maybe my view of reality is just warped, I don't know.

With math, well I will admit that I have gotten much better at doing basic math over the years, but it's been a slow process, and to this day I still pull out a calculator for many rather basic calculations that most people would be content to estimate mentally. As for anything beyond basic addition/subtraction/multiplication/division, don't even bother asking me, not unless you have an old textbook I can use to refresh my memory with.

My classmates and teachers all have me on a f****n pedastal due my intelligence. They expect me to know everything, then when I don't have I suddenly lost what makes me relevent? I don't know everything, I have to learn just like everyone else. My memory is often superb though, and my mind works especially well with numbers/patterns. I take no notes during Math class but still manage to score A+ on next week's quiz while a majority of the class struggles. I am super attentive to detail, so I also score A's in general on classwork, but it took me thrice as long to complete that one assignment than the typical person.
Does that really make me more intelligent? There are many things my mind doesn't mesh well with. For example, I am prone to doing bad in English classes because I struggle to gather the passion to write about stupid s**t, or stuff I can't relate to. Everyone is good at something, no one is good at everything, so what defines a genius?
My social skills aren't the best (decent at times) and despite getting along well with everyone I don't have any friends. I am 22 years old but never has had a job. I secretly struggle with depression. I kinda fit in everywhere due to great versatility in interests and my accepting/curious/understanding nature but then again I belong nowhere due to my individuality, eccentricities, and inability to develop relationships. Puts me at a dilenma: I actually like people a lot, very interesting to learn about a person. Contrary, I want to isolate...

I relate to this. It makes me an anxious mess sometimes. I simply cannot deliver and then it hurts to be dropped.

Audiobooks have become a profitable industry, so the production values have been rising.

You need to have a IQ of at least 71 to be diagnosed. So people with even below average skills and average intelligence can be legitimately diagnosed with Aspergers. Savants are only 10% of the Autistic population. A site like this will attract Aspes on the high end of the intelligence and written communication skills. But everybody should be welcomed here. I have noticed that my support groups attract more of a mixture of people.