How open are you about your Asperger's?

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Jensen
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29 Mar 2014, 4:12 am

Sounds all too familiar.


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Al725
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29 Mar 2014, 8:03 pm

Not open at all. I geuss the only exception would be if I met someone who was open about his/her's. I might open up to that person in private or in a group of like minded individuals but they better not rat me out to any NTs!



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29 Mar 2014, 10:05 pm

I want to amend mine.

I am not open about my diagnosis.

I am open about certain challenges (related to the diagnosis) and some are apparent without me trying to be open about them.

I rock in private and keep that to myself (unless I'm severely agitated and then I cannot help it). I'm slowly opening up to colleagues about the extent of my sensory difficulties (when it's pertinent information...or when I should have mentioned it already).



FireyInspiration
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29 Mar 2014, 10:30 pm

I'm open about it to really close friends, with other people who have a good idea of what aspergers means and peers who also have disabilities. In essence, I tend to make sure its the kind of person who will accept me for it, so I'm very cautious about it.



Shadewraith
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29 Mar 2014, 10:44 pm

I'm open to the point where I don't lie about having disabilities, but I don't go out of my way to let people know. Having more than just Asperger's, I feel like people might think I'm making it up and suffer from 'special snowflake syndrome', so I usually just mention which disability is relevant at the time.


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Wishey
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30 Mar 2014, 3:57 pm

I mention it whenever the topic or something like it comes up. I used to be really secretive about it, but now I'm more comfortable with people knowing.



capri0112
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30 Mar 2014, 5:28 pm

I want to be open about it with everyone, but am painfully aware of the lack of understanding out there, so I mostly keep my mouth shut. I have NEVER shared it at work because I predict it would be more harmful than helpful...precisely because autism is NOT accurately understood.

The exception is my family, although even with them, I don't talk about it much. My family members (husband, children, mother, siblings, etc), like most folks, are grossly under- and mis-informed about autism. Any discussion with them on the topic quickly hits a wall.

Sadly, I know that the few people I have told make no effort whatsoever to seek out greater knowledge on autism, which (if I allow it to) makes me feel I am personally not worthwhile enough to them that they would want to understand it (and therefore me) better. The status quo continues: they know about it, but there is rarely any conversation on it beyond that.

I have only told 2 people I consider(ed) friends, and one of those 2 "friends" used it against me in the worst way imaginable (I won't go into details, but needless to say, we are no longer friends).

I vacillate between feeling very sad, and sometimes just outright furious, that my "disability" or whatever you want to call it, means so little to the people I care about. It's hard not to take it personally.


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Last edited by capri0112 on 30 Mar 2014, 5:57 pm, edited 5 times in total.

Kurgan
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30 Mar 2014, 5:34 pm

Only people I trust completely, plus one ex-girlfriend know about it.



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30 Mar 2014, 7:32 pm

I don't hide that I have autism. I have shared the fact that I was diagnosed with autism to family, friends, and my fellow workers. I even have autism license plates on my car. I am also involved in a music ministry where I give thanks to God for making me autistic because it has given me special talents and gifts that I enjoy and share.


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capri0112
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30 Mar 2014, 9:31 pm

Opi wrote:
and it can also be a way for predators (bullies, etc.) to target us, so be careful.


I learned this the (very) hard way. We are sometimes easy prey for a wolf in sheep's clothing.

I envy those of you who feel free to be open about it, and am happy not everyone has had negative experiences.

Still, I would gently advise most of us to disclose cautiously.


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kaiouti
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05 Apr 2014, 4:10 am

Willard wrote:
When you mention Dyslexia, most people in the room know immediately what you're talking about. Almost nobody has any clue what Autism really means, much less Asperger Syndrome and the few who have heard of AS likely heard it in connection with some horrific violent psychopath, because that's the only time the news media (in the US) ever brings it up. Then there's the common mispronunciation "Ass Burgers," rather than "Ahz-pair-gur."
.


actually it is very similairly pronounced as ass burgers or asp purgers to be totally correct, I still wish it was as-purr-jers but whatever



rebecca1220
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05 Apr 2014, 4:53 am

I generally dont tell people unless they are close friends I know I can trust. Or if they mention/ask about it. Generally its not something I talk about or disclose.

It came up with some people on my course, because there is a mature student with a child with aspergers and I found it interesting to offer my perspective.

xx



EnglishJess
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06 Apr 2014, 3:00 am

I will mention having Aspergers to anyone and everyone, just so they understand why I act the way I do.



Daydreamer86
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06 Apr 2014, 8:42 am

I am fairly open about it. I think it helps that I work in an environment where people know a lot about autism anyway so a lot of my colleagues worked it out themselves that I have Aspergers.


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AutisticGuy1981
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06 Apr 2014, 8:53 am

I don't tell anyone as most people will think you wear it like a badge if your up front and open



Kiriae
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06 Apr 2014, 9:16 am

I am not so open about it (especially since I don't have the official diagnosis yet) but I also don't hide the fact although usually I just tell "this is who I am", "I got problem with understanding some social rules", "I can't do 2 things at once" or "I am too focused on details". I come with the AS thing only if it is a right thing to say at the moment, at least in my opinion. Today it wasn't so good idea I think but well, at least one of my friends knows now.

In my weekend school the teacher told us to - anonymously - grade other people projects. I choose the grades honestly, A if the work was great, B if it was lacking something and C or D if it was lacking a lot. Then the teacher told us the results:

- Most people choosed similar grades which was straight A for all projects, only Kate choose the grades lower than the rest.
- I was just honest! The point was to grade the projects honestly...
- Honesty is not always socially acceptable.
So I lowered my voice and told to my friend, angry for myself:
- Looks like I did it again. I understand it other than the whole rest of class.
- It like you got something like obsessive telling truth issue. Ha, ha.
- Close but not quite right, I got Asperger Syndrome.
- Ohh... <silence>
- You know what it is?
-<nod>
- OK...

I hope he is OK with it. He was still sitting next to me for the rest of day and we laughed a bit so I guess it wasn't that big issue.