Can you hold down a debate?

Post Reply New Topic

I preferably do not debate, - for the same reasons as most here. My arguments drown, my mind goes blank, I can´t keep up and end up aggreeing with the last honorable speaker.

Last edited by Jensen on 31 Aug 2014, 3:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

I used to love debating things with people, now I find it to be an exercise in frustration. I'm not good at delivering comebacks, and it takes me a lot of time to come up with logical arguments, so I often end up spitting out whatever half-baked, uninformed ideas I have on my mind.

The part that frustrates me the most is the fact that I'm not good at convincing other people that I'm right and they're not, even when I know damn well that they're spouting misconceptions.

I can't debate, I'm too slow. And also I take what someone tells me quite seriously.
I mean, if someone told me the earth is square, in the moment, I will be picturing a square earth and considering the possibility.
I don't have quick comebacks. Everything has to be analyzed and a reply has to be formulated, and that takes time.

It depends on the subject and how much I know about it. If it is about US coins I know I will win.

I can't handle spontaneous debate.
In HighSchool I was on the debate team and debate would work by teams of two. I had an NT friend who would debate with me and we were very good at debating together. He would handle the impromptu stuff, and I would write out strong arguments and tend to give only prewritten speeches that were handcrafted. I found that public speaking was easier than socialization. And I was far more comfortable in highschool.
I love a good debate, but they are very rare. And I can't handle impromptu debates. What I mean by debate is not the NT style of debate. What I am referring to is very formal with heavily structured rules.

Not in real life. People do not know the difference between debate and a verbal fight or a yelling contest.

I cannot hold down a debate, at least in the face-to-face format, because I become either a foaming angry mess or a quietly mumbling nothing. Usually I need time to form my thoughts. That doesn't mean I'm not fantastic at gently getting around or redirecting or deflecting debates when there is a need to do so, but actually joining in, fighting the fight, advancing a cause through brute on-the-spot logical and rhetorical manipulation? Nope, not in most cases. Likely, for most who have AS or autism or whatever, we need or like to know A LOT about what we're saying before being prepared to wade in on a subject, and even then we may get lost in minutiae, because that's how we are. Written communication is different, as several people noted already...

These are my thoughts. I have often tried to break through that wall of being poor at debates, with what I perceive to be poor results.

All that said, at least some people whom I consider to have stellar debating skills have said I'm good at it, or good at holding logical conversations, or something good that doesn't make me sound like an abject failure in the field of talking with less than complete agreement with other people, so perhaps this is in my head and owing to some overly high standards that ought to be shed. Who knows. But there does seem to be a pattern here.

I am very good at debating. When I can talk, that is.

I can relate to not being able to think on the spot. It puts too much pressure on me and I just get nervous about what would be the best possible answer. Also pretty much everything I say sounds idiotic since I have no idea how to translate my thoughts into words.

If it's something I know a lot about, yes I can debate and very well. My issue is that the tactics used by people are just illogical. Such as "I like blue." becomes "I hate green."

Fallacies and traps are the tools and weapons of most debaters. I also take issue with that.
Real/imaginary, and subjective/objective, are interchanged by most people, but they are not interchangeable.

I find when I'm debating people are unable to compartmentalize subjectiveness and objectiveness. A lot of people don't seem to understand how I can feel one way, but objectively feel another. Then I get treated like a hypocrite. Then I have to go on to explain " no no, this is objective, this is subjective. Do you not understand how I can separate the two and speak on the issues separately?"

I come across very condescending sometimes without noticing,

This makes perfect sense to me and I can relate.
We are failing to filter all of our existence through our imagined identities. Most people cannot follow us there to the world outside of one's self. Oddly I've had something similar told to me by someone who seemed incredibly self-obsessed from my perspective. I was unable to properly recognize or respect her imagined place in hierarchy.

- different worlds.

IRT your user name, you could always end a debate with someone by concentrating hard on them causing their nose to bleed, or head to explode.

I couldn't debate to save my life. I forget what I said seconds earlier and lose the ability to connect points I've made and... ah never mind...

Debate? No

I can debate well, even my grade 2 report card says so.