Annoyed with the question "Can I help you?"

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If I understand your argument correctly you are saying that both having money and having autism entitle you to be treated in the way you are comfortable with. I agree that one is always free to take one's spending dollar elsewhere - the communication tool of commerce. Which is why most sales people are fairly reasonable. Although sometimes I think they don't like it when people who don't fit the look of the store are browsing. I know I've been made to feel unwelcome because I was dressed like a slob. Sometimes they think you are going to steal, too, I think. Although I've never stolen anything.

But anyway, with regard to being treated differently because of your disclosure of autism, that can be both good and bad. Sure she will give you the time you need, but will she treat you in other different and maybe unexpected ways later? I'm becoming more and more reticent to disclose as I get older as doing so in the past has had unpleasant consequences.

Disclosing my autism to the receptionist simply revealed my reasoning for not wanting to make my decision immediately. One trait that many of us with autism have is an adherence to routines and not wanting change. My routine for many years has been with the old doctor, and to change to a new one would require my going to the new doctor for an initial visit (which I did), and then thinking about it for several days. I am happy I have remained with the old doctor because I have gone there for many years, and he understands my medical history. The only reason I considered changing to the new doctor was because my father-in-law highly recommended him for Coumadin testing. I have had only one challenging situation in regard to revealing my autism, and it wasn't actually anything negative, just an interesting moment.

I wouldn't trust any doctor who wanted to stop all medication for no other reason than that he wants to see what happens. Seems kinda dumb. I think you made the right decision.

Yes! I can't stand it!! !

That's why I wear my earbuds and listen to my Ipod (sometimes I just have my earbuds in with the end of the cord just in my pocket) when I got to stores! That way, even if I do hear them and just ignore them, they don't persist, and they leave me alone

I went to Best Buy a few weeks ago to compare a couple cameras I was looking at. Even though I had my earbuds in, a worker came up to me and (I assume) asked me if I needed help. I just kept trying out the cameras but he just stood there like 3 feet from me, making me really uncomfortable I eventually talked to him about the cameras and it turned out that I already knew more about the cameras than he did. For this reason, I don't really like going to Best Buy and having sales reps hovering around me.

Jetbuilder, what you said is another reason why I don't like sales people helping me. There used to be a time when you could walk into a store and the clerk was actually knowledgeable about the products he was selling. I have heard that such a time actually did exist. Perhaps it was before I was born. But 90% of the clerks I encounter don't know a damned thing about anything they are trying to sell. And it's not like the store even orders products anymore. Corporate offices a million miles away decide what this particular demographic needs and the truck just shows up and brings what it brings. So none of the people in the store really know what they are selling or why. Usually if I ask a question the clerk just reads what is written on the box. Well what do I need him for then? I CAN READ!! ! And before I buy a product of significance, I usually do an ample amount of research so I know what I am buying and often times I end up teaching the clerk about the product.

And it's not like they can do anything I can't so while I am there anyway. Many stores don't have a "Back" anymore so whatever is on the shelves is all they have. Shipments come once or twice a week so they don't have to store anything anymore. My mom and I were at Payless a couple of weeks ago because she wanted to treat me to some boots. I was looking at a couple of pairs that I liked but one of them was not on the shelf in my size. She asked the clerk if he could look in "the back" to see if they had any. I explained to her that there was no "back" and all we had to do was to look up at the top shelf where the shoes that did not fit on the regular shelf were stacked. She said, "I'll ask anyway because he may have more in another room." So she asked, he came over, looked up at the exact shelf I had looked at, noticed the exact same thing I already knew, that they did not have that boot in my size, and said, "We don't have it." He did give me the closest store that did though which did not help me because it's in a different state than where I lived.

But I know that 90% of the time, the clerk is not going to educate me on a product, is not going to go to the back room to see if they have the product and is not going to do anything that I can't do myself. So I prefer to just ask him to do something if I want him to do something like call another store because I don't want to. But as far as regular service in the store, if he can't do something I can do myself and sometimes even better than he can, and if I have to end up educating him on the product, I don't need him bugging me. And I should not have to pay inflated prices so that they can afford to pay him if he doesn't know anything about his product. Maybe they should pay me for having to educate him. That's how I feel.

And I hate this scenario which happens WAY TOO OFTEN!!
Skibum: can you help me with this product?
Sales clerk: No, I don't know anything about it, or No, I don't know where it is.
then sales clerk just stands there like an dumbfounded iditot
So Skibum has to say, "is there anyone who can help me then?"
Sales clerk "I don't know."
Skibum "Well can you find out?" Before I have a fit and rip your face off.
Sales clerk "uhh"
Skibum "Can I talk to your manager?"
Sales clerk "Ok"
Skibum "So. Manager, can you help me"
Manager either reads what is written on the box or says, "I don't know when we will have another one, the truck just brings what it brings"


I want to be able to talk to a clerk if I feel like it not because he is pressuring me to talk to him.

I was on the phone with an internet sales company trying to get information about a product I wanted to buy from them. I asked about ten or so questions about the product and the guy did not know the answer to a single one of them. They were not difficult questions at all, just normal things you would need to know about this product to figure out if it was the right product for what you needed. It's not like I even asked him how it would affect the air velocity of a coconut laden swallow. I mean my questions were easy like, "Is this product environmentally toxic in any way?" "Can I use this product on my skin?" "Does this need to be diluted?" Do you know what sizes of bottles it comes in?" "Do you know the price?" "Is there someone else who knows more about this that I can talk to?" But every single question was returned with, "I don't know the answer to that." At the end of our conversation he had the nerve to ask if he could help me. My response was, "Obviously no because apparently you don't seem to know anything about anything." My husband thought my response was funny and laughed. The sales clerk thought it was offensive and hung up the phone.

Last edited by skibum on 07 Oct 2014, 11:26 am, edited 2 times in total.

And then there is the company that specializes in one product. Okay, one (1) ONE UN UNO, you sell one thing. Not 2, not 12, not 20. and anything else they might sell is an accessory to that ONE product. And how many times have I had this conversation?
Skibum "Do you know this or that about the product?"
Sales rep: "No"
Skibum "So have you ever used the one product you sell?"
Sales rep "No"