I figured out what NT's mean by "smiling"

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And you know what's crazy? I was in my car once parked outside a friend's house. I was just enjoying my time waiting for her and my radio might have been on. I was enjoying the day and I was smiling. But I was alone. Well my friend came out of her house and saw me in the car. She later told me that I am fake and not trustworthy and insincere because I smile a lot when there is nothing to be smiling so much about. She said that because I was alone in my car with no one else talking to me, there could not possibly be anything for me to be smiling about. I think she must have lost her mind to say something like that. It's so stupid.

I think that's the individual. I've been caught doing that. Daydreaming and just beaming away. Everybody has always asked only, "Whatcha smilin' about?"

Of course, maybe they're relieved I am smiling? LOL

Seriously though, I have never had anyone say otherwise.

Interesting conversation. I can see why it would be confusing. I'm NT, but my son has aspergers. I've been told my whole life that my resting face is a Bit*# face. So I try to walk around with a smile also, otherwise it doesn't go over well.

Oh, now I find this out. Thank God it only took 50 years.
I have been using that fake smile for years now, it seems to work, but then I'm seriously face blind, so wouldn't notice even if they were angry at me. The only way I know they are angry at me is when they avoid me and don't respond to a "Hello" (which at least half the office does).

I bought a book on reading emotions. Even after reading the entire book cover to cover and doing the 20 questions at the end, I got 3 right. Random chance should have got me 4 right. I asked a NT friend to do same the questions and he got 12 right without even reading the book, all natural.

An NT getting criticism about their face. Must be a autism trait you have there.

I try to keep a neutral face in public as a default expression. But, there are times when I wear a happy face and it makes things much easier for me. Actors seem to be able to turn it on and off. That is a talent I greatly admire. Putting myself behind a mask and letting the world see what it wants and not what I am.

Why should I let the world see me as who I am and not as who they are comfortable with?

Oh that makes sense! I always got that comment too because it seems like I look angry all the time. So I started to be more reflective about my face muscles, as to not look so angry. Now I get comments that I have such positive energy!

It got so far that when people do presentations or are talking in a meeting, I nod a lot, and express a lot with my face to look like I am contemplating what is being said. I feel like I exaggerate on my facial expressions, but I think that I get that feeling because I am doing an effort - it doesn't come naturally. Anyway, people feel a lot calmer seeing that someone is attentively listening to them. I started doing a lot of nodding when people talk because I realised a lot of people are afraid to talk in groups, so having a friendly face in the crowd who does not look bored, calms them

Yes, I wish I learned that lesson earlier in life. Everyone enjoys seeing a happy face. One of my tricks, is to think about something amusing. This produces a true smile and then I feel confident to make eye contact. The length of the eye contact is still a work in progress. I try to keep it short and let the other person break it off if they are uncomfortable.

So many times, I see my reflection in the face of others. A sad or angry face get a sad or angry reply. A happy or admiring face gets a true smile back. The same thing works with small talk. If all they need to do is nod and smile, the encounter tends to be more positive.

My mother tried to teach me these things when I was a teenager. It went right over my head.

Well that's another mystery cleared up for me as well.

Thank you OP.