Anyone else never been clubbing before?

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I went a couple times but didn't enjoy myself at all. I hate noisy environments because I can't talk loudly so no one ends up being able to hear me speak. I only speak at one volume ever. I also can't dance as it just feels so awkward. Drinking doesn't help whatsover. Alcohol just makes me less social, tired, and tipsy.

I have no desire to go again. It just isn't for me. I prefer 1on1 company in quiet environments.

Let's talk about that on one of the threads I have about it. Don't wanna go off topic in this one.



I'm ok at it, not great. But I've always liked games, and been able to socialize a bit better over then.

I notice a lot of aspies seem to be teetotalers. I wonder why?

What's clubbing?

I've been to crowded bars on occasion. Is that clubbing?

Clubbing is an awful activity, I have no interest in it, each of the few times I went to a bar with some others nerds I wanted to leave immediately.

Well, I wonder why so many people are so fond of poisoning themselves with bacterium piss.

However, I for one can't claim to have made a decision as an independent and respectable adult to avoid alcohol. I was simply too socially awkward, friendless, weak and cowardly to go through a normal teenage rebellious phase. I knew my parents wouldn't like me to drink alcohol and this was enough for me to think there was no point in trying stupidly to do it behind their backs, and with their money no less.

I don't see any reason to change this habit now. On the other hand, I did drink a bit of alcohol on a few occasions when my parents themselves or other family members offered it to me, so no teetotalling. Besides, I'm curious about what being drunk or a hangover feel like, so I've tried, three times so far, to get myself properly drunk alone in my room. Failed all three times. In fact, thinking of how I felt the last time almost makes me sick, to the point of not really looking forward to the next attempt, which will have to wait at least a few months anyway so I can afford it.

I have and it was honestly time wasted every single time. I don't drink, I don't dance, there's too many people and too much noise. People become rather stupid when drunk. I prefer to spend my nights reading.

Because it feels good. That's all, really.

It sounds like it just might not be for you, though. If it doesn't agree with you, there is no need to drink and you should not feel pressured to do so. I personally don't like to get too hammered; just a good buzz is plenty. Moderation is important.

Never been clubbing. This activity involves noise, crowds, and lots of drinking. Been to a number of family functions that also involved all of that. Hated it, but had to drive my mother to these events, once she stopped driving (health reasons). Mom died years ago, and I haven't been to one of these awful events since.

I am a hermit type, don't like noisy, chaotic environments, and don't drink, except for trying small amounts of things at family gatherings, out of curiosity. I don't buy booze for home use, and don't go out to bars. I can't figure out why anyone would willingly subject themselves to the torture of a noisy, crowded place full of drunk, and disorderly people.

Stop feeling bad about being left out. You aren't missing out on something good, you are being spared something bad.

If what you are really feeling is loneliness, there are better ways to deal with that. Volunteer, visit the elderly, take up a hobby, and go to places fellow hobbyists meet. Get involved with community stuff, such as help out at the library. Take courses at a nearby college, or night courses that many local grade schools offer. Get a part or full time job, if you don't already have one. There are a lot of other things you can try, as well. All of these things will let you meet people with similar interests, without having to fry your brains with booze, and most of these won't involve noisy, crowded, chaotic places, full of drunks.

Hope this helps.

I wonder if there is a correlation with the ones that can't get girlfriends etc.

I did it a few times in my late teens as it seemed to be what people my age did. I really didn't like it. Far too hot and noisy, not to mention expensive to get in and for drinks too. I can't dance and don't like dance music either. I seemed to have awful tinnitus afterwards too.

I was forced into a nightclub by my abusive mother. I was arrested within an hour (after being restrained by security staff for ages) under section 136 of the Mental Health Act. It wasn't a criminal arrest, it was an arrest to take me to a psychiatric hospital to be assessed, because they thought I was acutely delirious, when in fact I was having an extreme meltdown. I can't remember much of what I did but I do remember broken glass, my blood and me screaming. And the restraint and being handcuffed by a few police officers.

I will never go to a nightclub again. The sensory overload was EXTREME. PAIN.

I have never been to a nightclub, the closest I got was a particularly noisy bar with flashing lights etc. I didn't like it much so didn't go back.
To be honest I don't see the attraction, though a couple of people (NT people) have told me they don't like them either, they used to go only in the hope of meeting girls.

I see plenty of people talking about going but no real info on the experience, so OP this was my experience, you may find that something that peaks your interest, or like many of us find that you don't have any desire to ever go clubbing.

I've tried "clubbing" in an attempt to fit in before. I figured it wouldn't be so bad because for some reason I can't stand loud noise normally, but I like loud music. In any case I went to a "Glow Rage" (Pretty much a normal "club" experience with the added twist of extra black lights and the people on stage have paint guns spraying UV reactive body paints at the crowd). I liked some aspects of the glow rage party; they were playing music I liked but it was ruined because the sound team (I term that almost doesn't apply) couldn't tune a equalizer if their life depended on it. The amplifiers were constantly clipping and the highs, mids, and lows were all way out of proportion. If you find badly tuned sound systems as annoying as I do you may see that as a substantial issue.

Before I get to much off subject, the venue wasn't bad, there were multiple rooms and it was not filled to max capacity, so crowds were not an issue for me at the event. Be warned, some venues get so packed that you CAN NOT get anywhere without touching other people in the building, I would just turn around and leave if I walked into a place that was that crowded. Overall I wouldn't say I had a bad time for the first half of the event. The issue that kind of killed it for me was when the people I went with decided to try and "hook me up" with some random girl they found playing at a near by billiards table. The girl they found was definitely cute, but I don't do well with people I'm not acquainted with. That made it a very awkward 15 minutes, especially since I could feel the group I was with just watching us. (None of my friends know about my ASD, they all just assume that I'm just shy and awkward) So if you go with a group be prepared for something similar. It's somewhat expected that if you go alone to a club, your supposed to try and leave with someone that you've never met before. After that I just kind of disappeared for like half an hour and just listened to music on my own.

I wouldn't say the experience was horrible, but it was very taxing and stressful overall. I personally have no desire to go clubbing again. I'm glad I did try it, even if it was just to find out that I don't enjoy the experience. I think if anything you should look into a few night clubs around the area and give it a try once just to see what it's like.

Consuming a small quantity of "poisonous bacterium piss" as you so eloquently named it can be relaxing and, for me at least, alter my thought processes as well as helping my mind slow down.

I should have added this to the thread about "NT questions or phrases that drive you nuts." It's so weird that people call it "clubbing." It just makes me think of people whacking each other with clubs.

Around here people ask if you go downtown, meaning do you go out to bars/clubs. It's annoying because I think it goes with people assuming I'm younger than I am. Yeah I used to go to clubs, around 20 years ago. The atmosphere was a little different back then, but still, it wasn't all that great. I loved to go out dancing but pretty much everything else about it sucked, and the dancing sucked too when drunk people kept trying to "dance" with me.

I go downtown once in awhile to see a movie, and walk past the bars and clubs and they just look like the pits of hell. I see people sitting outside or haunting the doorways who really give me the creeps so I can only imagine how much worse it is inside. When I was younger I had no fear of going out at all hours of the night, and no one ever bothered me, but things have changed and now it feels way too dangerous. Lots of racial tension and people beating each other up at these places. And I don't drink anymore but if I did??? I would NEVER get a drink in a public place anymore, too many people slipping drugs in drinks.

I have this crazy fantasy of running a family-friendly dance club that does not serve alcohol and plays nothing but retro music (anything from 20's to 90's) and people dress up according to whatever era is on for that night. And for special occasions there would also be proper balls with classical music. During the day would be dance classes so people can learn whatever kind of dance they are interested in. And a costume shop of course. I think it would be so much fun! But of course it would fail miserably if there is no alcohol being served. I don't understand why people can't go out at night and have fun without drinking.

The most crowded bar I ever entered kicked me out really quick. They told me to take off my hate and I refused.

It wasn't so much that I wanted to wear it as that I didn't have a place to put it.

I never went back to that bar again.

In general, though, I greatly prefer laid back bars that aren't crowded.

By the way, when I was in college, there was one bar that I used to go in from time to time. It was too crowded up front but back by the pool tables it wasn't bad. The only reason I even went there was to play pool. Every time that I would walk into the bar, someone near the door would ask me where they could buy drugs. Not being a drug user, I wasn't much help. One time the guy asked me where he could get a baggie and I told him the local grocery store sold them by the box. After a while I started to realize that it wasn't someone looking to buy drugs -- it was undercover narcs looking for someone to arrest.

Times have changed at that bar. Nearly twenty years after that I walked in one day and some drunk cowboy stopped me and asked if I had a condom he could have! He said he really needed it bad. There was a drunk cowgirl standing nearby waiting for him.

I do have a life. I have a (oh so boring) part time job I'm stuck in until I find a different job. I have a boyfriend, a mature older man who does not like clubbing (although he probably went once or twice when he was a teenager). I've done voluntary work in the days when I "should" have been out getting rat-arsed the night before. I went to college. Now I have such a busy life, that I hardly have time to care about what I'm not doing - UNTIL a youngster brings up their recent clubbing experience and it all hits home that I did not do anything like that when I turned 18. And, oh, what a coincidence, the only Aspie in the whole family also happens to be the only one who has never been clubbing in her life.

I've always been like this. No matter how good my own life is going, I still find myself comparing myself to everyone else.

Also what puzzles me is more Aspies here appear to have been partying in their lives than have been married. I'm 26 and I'm engaged, and I find being in a loving relationship much more naturally easier and fun than going partying.

In the UK we call it clubbing. It's hard to keep talking in the American language.