What were you like as a kid?

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Heavily edited and abridged: I was often referred to as a "s**t of a kid".

Interesting discussion for me. My son was always really sensitive, very empathetic also with animals, he needed almost constant physical contact and reassurance when a baby, that was fine - though a bit sleepless - as I loved him completely from birth.. I got criticised for being over-attentive and over-responsive, but as I am half Aspie myself I sensed it was fine, I was responding to a need in him.

Then he went to nursery school and everything changed. At 3 he was being bullied (i know that now) I was not allowed inside the school only in the foyer, I only knew he was getting sick and he was hurting inside. after a few months I persuaded my husband that we HAD to get him out of there. .there are no school alternatives, we're very rural and in a country not our own. Now (i'm homeschooling him and his sister now), at 7, he starts to remember things that happened at that school. Totally unprompted.

He's had meltdowns, sometimes every night, though slowly improving..and I'm really sure this rage against the world, against me, and I reckon it would be himself if I wasn't there to help him through it, comes from his experiences. Some of what I've read here seems to point to that too.

I think all I can do is provide the healing environment, the freedom to be himself, the patience and love, to see this through, till most of that anger comes out. better out than in, eh?

I've never taken him to a psychologist, as I can't see how it would help as he can't talk about stuff. All i can do is try to sometimes interpret for him so he can process feelings, e.g. tentatively say 'do you think you might maybe feel like that because... ?' and sometimes it's clear i manage to get it right, and it's also clear he feels much better after figuring it out. i guess i have quite a deep mistrust of professionals, and the system, due to what I've seen and read so far.

Our therapy is probably a bit unorthodox, when we drive past the school we roll down the windows and shoot it with imaginary bazookas until it's levelled. Is that really bad? It is a lot of fun!!

I was outgoing and I liked to talk to people, any person if they would listen and I would ramble about my interests to them while they pretended to play attention. I had no friends in my school I was sent to a poor school and the teachers had no time to care if I was a normal child or not, I spent a lot of time hiding under desks and thinking deep thoughts, reading books in the library I wasn't concerned about my lack of interaction all the time I spent by myself was refreshing. Looking back I had no idea of social norms I picked my face and hair a lot, I hid behind people's backpacks in the hallway and thought they couldn't see me, when I picked my nose I assumed the other kids wouldn't notice this because I hid it with my other hand poorly, I cut the hair off my arms with scissors out of boredom in class and because I liked the way it felt. I had odd mannerisms and I spoke to people like the people I heard on t.v or in books often over dramatically surprisingly I was not beat up or bullied for this much but I assume all the other kids had their own problems to care about or I was lucky with classmates, they likely thought of me as being what kids called then "special."

At home I did have a few friends in the neighborhood who didn't care if I was strange, but I spent a lot of time by myself playing with Legos, drawing pictures, playing video games and reading books, I enjoyed to spend time outside observing animals like snakes and ants, I also enjoyed riding bike when I managed to learn how to. Spending time outdoors also helped me get away from my house when my father was furious with me.

Life went downhill for me after my family left the city and moved to a smaller town around the same time I hit puberty but I look back on my childhood fondly.

I was reading at 3 and sucking my thumb at 6. I was both "too smart" and also very naive and shy. I didn't really understand the rules, social or otherwise, and would be surprised when I got in trouble. People said I "marched to the beat of a different drummer".

I got teased and excluded, though I don't think I all the way understood that at the time (edit: though, that is what got me to stop the thumb-sucking, so I guess I got it some). I tended to keep to myself a lot and was always reading. I did have some friends, though, other kids who were also "weird" or bookish.

I loved everything to do with outer space. I'd stay up late to watch Star Trek with my dad, read lots of non-fiction books about space, astronauts, etc as well as science fiction books. I was reading popular science books aimed at adults by the time I finished grade school, though I didn't always understand them.

*blinks* A lot like Secretalien, it seems, except with less thumb-sucking, and a few Star Wars toys and the original Cosmos miniseries (followed by the Cosmos book, followed by more astronomy books and magazine subscriptions) instead of Star Trek.

I haven't maintained that level of interest in astronomy, but still enjoy stargazing and occasionally spotting binocular-visible comets.

Cosmos came out when I was 16. I wish they had it when I was 6.

Birth to 4 years
In my early years I was like any other typically developing baby. I wasn't noticeably behind or ahead on any of my development, I didn't display any peculiar behaviour, and I was sociable, even with my peers.

4 to 6 years
These two years were when my behaviour drastically changed from the first day of school, which was a shock to my parents. Apparently on my first day of school (I was only 4 years old) I was very frightened for some reason, and it came out in ways that teachers thought was ''naughty behaviour''. So I had to have a teacher's assistant with me in the classroom to help me settle in, which did quickly help me settle in. But I was very anxious and tearful at school, and I would cry a lot, and throw temper tantrums if I was in a panic. For example, when I was 5 I was dropped off a bit late to school after visiting the dentist, and I didn't like being the last child to arrive, and I didn't want my mum to leave, so as a teacher forced me to come along into the school I kicked and screamed in a panic. I grew out of this sort of behaviour before I was 7, thankfully.

7 to 10 years
I emotionally caught up with my peers when I was about 7, but unfortunately when I was 8 I was diagnosed with this sh***y AS, which I think was far too early for a girl with very complex behaviour. I wish they had left it another few years, and at least just gave me a diagnosis of just Anxiety Disorder or even ADD, because, looking back, a lot of my issues at school were either due to anxiety or due to lack of paying attention in class. I didn't have special interests, and so there wasn't a certain thing I could go on and on about to people. The only noises I didn't like was sudden noises, otherwise I enjoyed noisy events like discos. But I did have an operation on my ears when I was 8 (for unrelated ear problems), which did leave my ears sore after that, so I suddenly became sensitive to loud noise since the operation. I'm not sure about my social ability, because I had a cousin the same age and we were very close, so I sort of clung to her and she clung to me, although we did often let other children play with us. I did enjoy playing with other children. If I hadn't of had my cousin, I might have been even better at making friends. My cousin was rather shy and had learning difficulties, but don't think she was on the spectrum.
At home, when I was aged 5 to 10, I had this strange habit of biting and throwing some of my toys because I thought they were ''cute''. I don't know what that was all about.

10 to 12 years
I started puberty when I was 11, and that was also when I started getting special interests, not with things, but with particular people. My hormones were so all over the place, that I was very confused with things like love, that I got obsessed with women at first, although not in a sexual way. I got a huge obsession with a female art teacher at first when I was 11, then a female Spanish exchange college student when I was 12.

12 to 15 years
*Sigh*. This was when I fell emotionally behind my peers again. They all became interested in make-up and hairstyles, while I had no interest at all. Also I became very excluded and rejected by my peers, and so was very socially isolated, which caused heart-break for me. I had no idea how to be a teenager because I felt I wasn't ready, and teenage girls were very scary (I still think teenage girls are rather scary, mostly the chavvy types).
When I was 13 I started my periods, and my hormones were still all over the place but my heterosexuality started to show because I got my first ''crush'' on this man who lived next door to my cousin (the cousin I was always best friends with). But the crush became a special interest, which became unhealthy. I got so obsessed, that I felt rather insane with it. I really badly wanted to be involved with him and his family, and I ended up stalking them because I badly wanted to be noticed by him and I wanted to find out every single thing about him. He soon noticed, and took it the wrong way, thinking I was stalking for different reasons (you know, like some serial killers do), and I nearly got into big trouble with the police. But my family stepped in and told the police that I was an innocent 14-year-old child, and I just had an obsession, and I was rather socially isolated and had a diagnosis of AS, and that was a good explanation.

15-17 years
I became more wise when I reached 15, and I also got used to being a teenager. I was still obsessed with this man, but I knew not to stalk any more. Only problem was, it overtook my mind, so it interfered with my education and social life at school. I did have some friends again then, but I fell out with them because of being too obsessed with this man, and all I could think about was him. But I was still more mature than I was when I was 13-14, and my hormones were still all over the place but calmed down a bit.

So that's me as a child. A bit of a rollercoaster, and it was like I was sometimes like an NT child, other times like an Aspie child (with the social awkwardness and obsessions), and other times like an ADHD child.

Detached
Disconnected
Bullied

It hurts me to see how many of you were bullied.. I think mental health should be taught in school, so kids will grow up being aware of why some people are the way they are. Might be useful for themselves as well, since most people face mental illness at some point in their life.

Cross between Augustus Gloop and Lenny Small, with big, dark autistic-kid eyes. Quiet, A+ student, scared the teachers. Being 1ft+ taller than everyone and having kids bounce off you does not keep you from being bullied.

I was a creature of solitude during the earliest parts of my life. I rarely wanted to interact with other kids my age and my mom told me she felt that she had a son who didn't love his parents.

My mom told me the first time she clearly realized that I was a different creature was during the holiday season one year - either '81 or '82. We were at the local mall and I was mesmerized by the animatronics display they had set up in the concourse. Mom recalled seeing another kid my age come up and stand next to me to watch. I gave this kid an odd look and then I retreated to the other side of my mom to get away.

Back in the summer of 1983 I can remember being in daycare and constantly being pestered by this kid who's name was dennis and although I'm sure he wasn't, he certainly was a menace to me. All he wanted was to be my friend and I wanted nothing to do with him. I give him credit though, he tried for the better part of a year before he gave up. But back then, the whole act of doing things with other kids was a foreign concept to me.

Another moment I remember from that summer was when I was on a trampoline and a girl came on and started bouncing with me. I told her to get off and when she didn't I grabbed her pony tails and yanked really hard to get my point across.

Looking back at the photo albums for the first years of my life I could only find two photos of me with other kids.

It wasn't until 1989 and third grade that I stated to come around to other kids. I had a handful of students make it a point to make sure I wasn't going to be left out and I was able to start to learn social skills as well as learn some coping skills to help keep my emotions in check.

Adults who knew me were quite impressed with how intelligent I was. My memory and recall of things was phenomenal. I had every line and song from "follow that bird" memorized and I could recall it at will.

I was more or less a fairly stereotypical high functioning autistic/aspie - it proved memorable for many people. Years removed from being a kid, people would still recognize my parents and stop them and ask them how I was doing because I had made the much of an impression on people.