Were you the most unpopular person in your school?
No,not really as I was rarely acknowledged and;in fact, often treated as super weird or something malevolent so, I just kept to myself seeing as how I could not make friends hardly though I sincerely tried..
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I'm an extremely vulnerable person. Vulnerability and emotion are very closely linked.
I strove successfully to be beyond unpopular; the ultimate gray man. I achieved anonymity. Being unpopular meant that others would have preconceptions about me. Being anonymous came with no preconceptions. It was freeing and independence writ large. As I was just barely out of my selective-mutism years, no one except my acquaintances ever received a reply to their questions about me.
Yes, I had the proverbial one friend and several acquaintances in school. Beyond that, I could be whatever others thought I was.
My school was, at the time, the most academically achieved school in my state. My grade-point average hovered around a D- range. I ended up "dropping out" of high school because it bored me. The school's administrators were concerned because, 1) they knew my IQ and wanted to keep me interested in their academic programs (I wasn't), and 2) they knew that, as the top school in the state, any students who dropped out were an educational embarrassment to them. I ended up going to college as soon as possible.
The odd thing is that, in occasionally searching online for the former popular students at my schools (who seemed destined for high-profile careers), I became more of a public figure than most of them.
So, as if we need to be reminded, popularity in school turns out to signify very little in life.
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Diagnosed in 2015 with ASD Level 1 by the University of Utah Health Care Autism Spectrum Disorder Clinic using the ADOS-2 Module 4 assessment instrument [11/30] -- Screened in 2014 with ASD by using the University of Cambridge Autism Research Centre AQ (Adult) [43/50]; EQ-60 for adults [11/80]; FQ [43/135]; SQ (Adult) [130/150] self-reported screening inventories -- Assessed since 1978 with an estimated IQ [≈145] by several clinicians -- Contact on WrongPlanet.net by private message (PM)
I was the top 5 unpopular people in school, targeted by anyone who wanted to verbally/physically abuse someone, I was target number 1.
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Andy
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 127 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
I did not have a diagnosis. It is clear as day to me now that I understand. It makes me mad and upset that nobody (teachers, family) thought to help me even though they now admit that they noticed the social and developmental problems I was struggling with and chose to punish me instead. Because my anxiety attacks, meltdowns, not understanding phrases or how to change my tone of voice etc. were seen only as me choosing to me a "problem child" and I needed to be physically punished and interrogated for hours. I didn't understand why I was being punished...
![Crying or Very sad :cry:](./images/smilies/icon_cry.gif)
.
![Crying or Very sad :cry:](./images/smilies/icon_cry.gif)
Oh, Wallflower, this is so sad
![Sad :(](./images/smilies/icon_sad.gif)
You just described how adults treated me when I was a child. I very obviously wasn't 'normal', but instead of sending me to a psychiatrist or special needs coordinator, they just endlessly criticised and yelled at me - even though I was never deliberately bad or disrespectful. After years of that, around about age 12-13, I begun showing signs of depression, which got dismissed as either "teenage moodiness", "bad attitude" or "attention-seeking", resulting in even more punishment. And so the downward spiral continued
![Mad :x](./images/smilies/icon_mad.gif)
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Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?
- Epicurus
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