I’m an aspie who is good with people, is this weird?

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ASD can affect empathy, but in a wide variety of different, even opposite, ways. In your case:


Some of us fail to notice other people's emotions unless they are very obvious, while, at the other extreme, some of us are ultra-sensitive to other people's emotions and easily overwhelmed. You're in the latter category, apparently. Either extreme can cause social difficulties.

In any case, "empathy" can mean many different things and has many different aspects. See, for example, The Six Essential Aspects of Empathy by Karla McLaren.

Yes I think it's entirely possible for an Aspie to be a good therapist or counsellor, if they were interested in it. As with NT's, I expect there'd be good ones and bad ones, it depends on the individual. The counsellors I've experienced have most likely all been NT, and looking back some of them have made mistakes with me because they didn't understand ASD, and the best one took a lot of trouble to understand the condition. The advantage with an Aspie counsellor for an Aspie client would be that they'd already have an understanding of the condition from the inside.

That "The Six Essential Aspects of Empathy" page was interesting, thanks.

Many thanks for the information.

Kudos to you for identifying your strengths and making the most of them! (and mitigating weaknesses)

@aqueflix, it occurred to me to ask, and forgive me if you went over this in previous responses, how good are you with people outside the structure of counseling, or that knowledge base?

I am hot/cold - intellectually and emotionally I can be in a "role" --- last night I was at a social event and found a person I was very comfortable with. Somehow it stayed in my comfort zone: topics I'd read about, empathy that was within a range. But most of the time socially I feel like I am teetering at the edge (of a cliff) and beyond that edge I don't have the words and my empathy is so strong I shut down.

So I wonder that you experience something similar: fantastic when you are in your "role" and otherwise challenged?

I don't think it's weird at all. If you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person.

I didn't know my lack of it untill I was mentally beaten by an empath to understand it. Dunning Kruger effect.

I discovered that empathy is all about highly sophisticated personal feelings that situation generates combined that with other side and your feelings are in resonance.


It has nothing to do with being nice and helpful. Empathy can be used criminally.

That pretty much sums me up SharonB. My skills with people are really isolated to counselling and psychological assessment (I'm a psychologist) where I am absolutely in my element. But, sadly they don't transfer well to normal non-clinical conversation and making friends.

Work is my social life. My friends are all psychologists and we talk about my special interest area. I can do small talk and pass for NT for the first time I meet someone, but I end up falling into my familiar "interviewer" role and don't really know how to share personal things about myself as I am very rarely required to do that in my work.

Lucky you! I get some of that, but would like more. How many of your colleagues might be Aspie? 1%, 10% more?

Now that I am ASD aware, I realize my director had assembled a team that was about 1/3 Aspie, 1/3 Aspie-friendly and 1/3 NT. We talked about work! We talked about projects! It was really nice. Because of a mgmt change, the culture is now "it's just a job" (so don't talk about it) and so it's not so nice anymore. I plan to go elsewhere with my special interest or find a new employable interest.

I know of no other aspie psychologists in my town.

I had to quit my last job due to a management change

RE: Mgmt change. Oh, no! It's everywhere! (joking use of superlative)

Wishing you well for your next career adventure!

The new adventure is going quite well thanks SharonB