Sorry, but I don't believe for one minute that anyone is shaming you about your virginity.
Maybe this may have happened when you were a teenager in middle school. But I find it very difficult to believe that adults are doing this. The Bay Area may be a bit more liberal, but it's not THAT different.
What you perceive as people being nosy is more than likely them trying to reach out to get to know you, and you don't know how to respond or you get defensive, and people then avoid you.
You've already indicated in a previous post that you have a lot of social difficulty. From your post:
***Often when offered a handshake, my hands simply stay at my sides and I give the person a blank look, i.e. blank facial expression. Often this angers or irritates people, and they make comments about me for it.
-Although I am not mutistic (at least not chronically), if someone asks me a simple question like, "What do you do for fun to relax?", I would look at them with a blank facial expression and just say nothing, or stutter with gibberish sounds like "eh", "uh", "oy", etc. Then after around five seconds I would answer, but I would answer stuff like, "Watching war movies like Platoon (1986) or Casualties of War (1989)." Then they would look at me as if they had a "wtf?" facial expression.
-I often am a bit worried about coming into contact with other people's germs. Sometimes I put the lower part of my face inside the upper part of my shirt when in a group of people. If I have to drink beer from the bottle of wine from the glass, often I tilt it so that the liquid enters my mouth, without my mouth actually touching the bottle or the glass. I often get weird looks for this.
-For some reason sometimes my balance is off, plus I am very clumsy; I accidentally tilt my torso backwards or forwards almost to the point of falling down.
-I absolutely need to eat finger foods with a fork or spoon. Thus, you often see me eating popcorn, chips, crisps, chicken wings, etc. with a fork or spoon.
-Since I have no natural instinct or notion of flirting, either I say nothing or say something idiotic. For example, either I tell a woman nor give hints that I like her, or I just blurt out straight, "I like you".
-I usually have had no body language or hand motions whilst talking. Lately I tried talking with my hands. However, my hand motions are often disjointed, causing me to accidentally knock glasses of wine and beer down without noticing.****
All of those things are going to put people off. They're going to notice all of this.
Has it never occurred to you that because of your autism you MAY be misinterpreting the intentions of other people?
_________________
That which does not kill us makes us stranger.