shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
i have never been an engineer before, but i did take up to Solid Mechanics II (inclusive) in Bachelors, in structural engineering.
i have never felt your "hyper focus" before.
on the other hand i also flunked out of that subject.
actually i feel like i have a hard time concentrating on anything, esp the older i get. 39. i could read a book if i like it, but sometimes i can't even keep up a conversation, much less do anything involving twenty steps with physics.
mostly i am just worried about (impending doom).
other thing is, i am not good at anything: academic, occupational, athletic, social, emotional, financial.
furthermore i do not like anything or anyone. not even, and esp not, my worthless corpse.
as a result of failure to concentrate (and many other factors), my worthless corpse 39 and nothing accomplished.
academic dismissal
made redundant
evicted
dumped by "friends"
i do not feel comfortable riding a bike or driving a car due to failure to concentrate, among other things.
If your mind is fixated on what will go wrong next, you will get exactly what you want.
s**t happens, all the time. Problem is once you're in a rut (which you're firmly in) you will see everything as correlated when it isn't.
39 is not too old to make small steps toward something useful. Even if you can only manage an hour a day, it all adds up.
10 Jul 2022, 9:50 pm
