Question About Eye Contact

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I can make [sporadic] eye contact with my mother when I talk to her, but that's it. I'm comfortable with her, obviously.

I can make eye contact for a few seconds and then I look away. It's pretty uncomfortable to do it even for a few seconds; I usually try to look at the bridge of their nose or somewhere that might look like I'm making eye contact without actually doing it.

It's part of the 'script' I have for social interactions.

I find it very hard to maintain I contact when I am speaking but not so much when the other person is speaking. Of course, when the subject matter is more emotional or stressful, any eye-contact is close to impossible without flaps, ticks, stuttering and increasing incomprehensibility.

I'll post more later, but I just wanted to say this.

Once when I told someone I didn't like eye contact much and found it felt horrible, they told me that most people don't like it. If that's true, then what's the big problem NTs have with Aspies?

I think it has to do with the degree of the problem, rather than the problem itself.
Everyone may experience problems with eye contact, but it's the degree of frequency and the level of difficulty that makes the delineation between NT and AC. And because it's a spectrum issue, it's hard to make that dividing line until it's to such a degree that people start taking notice.

For example, it's like that with ADD. Everyone gets absent minded, everyone forgets why they walked into a room, everyone loses track of where they parked their car, and everyone has times when they can't concentrate on the task at hand. But with people with ADD, it happens a lot more often, to the point where it has an impact on their ability to perform on a daily basis.

Plus, in some societies, people can be very nitpicky on how they view what is socially acceptable and what is not. There have been many times when I couldn't figure out what bothered people so much about what I say and do in social situations, but they seem to notice the difference.

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Never assume you know what I'm thinking, just ask for clarification.
"Not everything that steps out of line, and thus 'abnormal', must necessarily be 'inferior'. " -- Hans Asperger (1938)

i find eye contact with the majority of people very difficult. even with people i know on a one to one basis i find very uncomfortable. its strange, when im in a group of 3 or more with people i know its ok, and feel much more comfortable. but people i dont know well or havnt met, i hate looking at people, as other people have sed its odd and unusual to me. sometimes i force eyecontact to try and feel ok, but that just feels even worse, cos ill look for a few second and then just look away again, which gives people a worse impression of me than before

I don't even make eye contact with my managers at work. I completely fail at eye contact, I feel uncomfortable when I do it.

I've never had a problem with eye-contact.

Eye contact is important, yet people with AS have a problem in this area. I am generally comfortable making eye contact with people I am comfortable with. Someone resently approached my father and state that he worke in the same place I do and did not make eye contact(yes someone went to my 60-something father about his nearly 40 year old son) my father in his own way pointed this out. He does know I have AS , and I did "try" to explain to him this was a trait , yet I would work on this.
I have tried and stopped for the time being from "educating" my father.You will have to work on the eye contact and I wish you well.

eye contact is ridiculously overrated--I never notice whether or not someone is looking at me but I DO notice the J--- that is intensly staring at me and I back off.

The most interesting conversations I've had is when we both divert our eye gaze all around and so it must be with people similar to me.

If someone EVER tried to make me look at them...I can't imagine.

I defend my son's right to NOT have to look a the person. It's not so much a problem anymore.

When a person is thinking and speaking, he/she looks away and speaks, thougthfully. Makes perfect sense. I don't expect someone to stare at me the whole time as he/she is speaking. This makes me suspect their honesty.

A thoughtful person, NT or not, looks off to the side in though when answering a question.

When you first meet someone, yes, you should shake hands and look at them, initially. Anyone can trian themselves to do this, I think.

I don't have any diagnosis of any sort. But, I might have some aspie qualities. I've trained myself to do many things. I didn't speak in school and was extremely introlverted. I'm sure I didn't want people looking at me let alone speaking to me (especially adults). LOL.

Never allow someone to hold your child's chin and make him/her look. It's an invasion of space and an abuse of power.

I usually don't look in the eye of people I know, but I tend to stare (possibly with a harsh expression) at people I don't know especially if I'm trying to make a point or convince them of something. It feels more like I'm challenging them, which is not good, because I don't really try to be aggressive in my conversations, but it feels like if I want to tells them something I have to force-feed it to them metaphorically. It probably has something to do with my competitive nature and how I feel I'm always right, but it doesn't come off as very understanding, which I am, but it doesn't seem that way.