Essar wrote:
I've read through some of these descriptions of the way some here are feeling and I can't believe I am not the only one.
I used to see this commercial for some medication where someone walks into a crowded room and the room erupts into laughter, pointing even.
This was a long time ago. I was like, "That's me." I don't let it stop me and what I need to do. I keep on keeping on. But sometimes, that feeling is so extreme and it's so hard. I want to run. But I don't.
I'm very happy to have found this page. I'm so relieved. Also, I'm sorry that others have to feel that way.
Is there a pill? Am I nuts? I'm nearly 35. Doesn't seem to be going away.
Anyway, hello to all.
until last year i had a vomit phobia..all linked in my nightmare was that i would throw up in assembly one day and everyone would look round and laugh (thank god i graduated high school so theres no way it can come true)
it was the whole people are looking at me and judging me thing. My theorpist used to point out that who are these perfect people? Who gives them the right to judge you? If i never told people that i had a vomit phobia would they be able to tell ? No (not on a daily basis)
The point is no one knows what happens behind closed doors and these so called people who you think are perfect are not. Most of the world's people with mental illnesses like ours are hidden and undercover lots of times u would never know.
My main problem is as i am in my peek years (18on wards) i feel self concious that men are looking at me lustfully and women are looking at me like sluts. It doesnt matter what i wear, i feel liek this . If i dont wear any makeup and cover up i still feel people are looking at me coz i look gross.
and other days when i make an effort i think people are looking at me because i stand out. The truth is yeah i do stand out, and i cant win so its best to think there looking at me because im pretty.
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I'm fed up of explaining after every post, I have dyslexia so sometimes my spelling and punctuation is off. I do use spell check doesn't always work...