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ablomov
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27 Nov 2008, 3:49 am

deaconblues said:But you're in a unique position to make sure that wouldn't happen to your kids...


No No No - what I went thro for ten fifteen years was totally out of my control. Always will be thats why I cannot work amongst others.

I have deleted lots of stuff I have written on this reply, its raking up too much unpleasant crap from the past. Best medicine - to forget it, shut it away. Its gone. As I told a good friend who blogs as an aspi - its best if you were to never mention it again in your life. You would serve yourself better that way. Break from it. She's quiet lately, perhaps she has.



Last edited by ablomov on 27 Nov 2008, 1:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.

misfit
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27 Nov 2008, 1:20 pm

got 3 kids. Think I may be on the spectrum but am not dx'd. Ditto for husband. Kids - one in partic - exhibit aspie like traits on occasion. I always wanted kids but it's very, very hard work.



gbollard
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27 Nov 2008, 3:27 pm

Danielismyname wrote:
LifeOfTheSpectrum wrote:
High Functioning Autism has a Language Delay, wheras Asperger's doesn't have a language delay.


There's actually a lot more to it than that, it's just that they're more alike than not. This is from everyone; Attwood, Wing, Tantam, et al (they all agree with this).


Actually, you can no longer include Tony Attwood in that list. He emailed me a response that he now considers the two terms clinically interchangeable. As a parent with both types of children, I'm inclined to agree.



PunkyKat
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27 Nov 2008, 8:46 pm

Never having kids. My grandmother can plead all she wants but she is never getting any from me. I hate kids so why would I have any of my own. I'm totaly clueless when it comes to children and they overwelm me. If I ever did have a baby I would develop bad PPD because of the stress of the drastic change in routine and lack of sleep. If I don't get enough sleep I will start to hallucinate and see things that aren't there or see them as something else. Not a great thing to do when there is a baby around.



Metalwolf
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27 Nov 2008, 9:27 pm

Don't have kids, don't like them, but strangely finding myself really really desiring to have one. Not in a "Oh they're so cute, I would like one," but more like "I have to have one even though I mostly ignore them and they annoy me, but I will tear myself apart physically if I can't give into this urge" kind of thing.



BelindatheNobody
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27 Nov 2008, 9:48 pm

Don't have any, and don't want any.
Used to think about adopting one.
But thinking about it, I know I wouldn't be able to handle being a parent. So...
No kids for me, ever.


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ArchVile
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20 Feb 2009, 4:53 pm

My parents were very supportive of us and did an excellent job parenting. Their kids were their life. It is very likely that at least one of my parents has AS. So people with autism can be breeders.

On the other hand I have mixed feelings about children. Is it worth it to endure all the transitions and problems? Unlike my parents I cannot isolate myself in extreme rural areas. At this rate it may never happen. Living up to the standards of a normal life is challenging enough without the additional burden of family issues.



ablomov
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21 Feb 2009, 5:05 am

My parents and come to think of it a lot of relatives on my mothers side were a bunch of buerks. Shallow, limited vision, subservient, dim, shortsighted blah blah blah...........

Just cannot see the point of creating off-spring. i think I would be violent, overwhelmed with stress.



DeLoreanDude
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21 Feb 2009, 5:06 am

I don't ever want to have kids or get married.

But I am 14 so that could change later on I guess.



Liresse
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21 Feb 2009, 8:44 am

Metalwolf wrote:
Don't have kids, don't like them, but strangely finding myself really really desiring to have one. Not in a "Oh they're so cute, I would like one," but more like "I have to have one even though I mostly ignore them and they annoy me, but I will tear myself apart physically if I can't give into this urge" kind of thing.
it is bizarre isn't it?

i'm engaged. when i get married to my NT fiance, we're not going to have kids for a long time (or until i adjust to the million and one new situations!). my fiance comes from a family with four kids (i think he wants 4 kids), all NT. i came from a family of two kids, my younger sister i think has mild AS traits; father mild AS traits, and i have been diagnosed with AS, ADHD (i think mild) and anxiety disorder.

concerning the autism vs aspergers discussion that is sneaking into this thread, this long article (which was stolen from some other thread on WP.net) may prove interesting reading.

i have always been vastly conflicted in my opinions about having kids. on the one hand i used to write letters to my (non-existent) children because i felt so strongly about my parents, and that i really wanted to be a better mother than my mother was to me, but on the other hand, kids outside of teenagehood terrify me and i have no idea how to interact with them.

my fiance definitely wants kids. so i guess that's what we'll end up doing lol. i'm that conflicted about my own feelings that i'd rather cling to someone else's decision. years and YEARS down the track.


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Tim_Tex
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21 Feb 2009, 2:24 pm

I do want to start a family of my own, but unfortunately, it's growing more and more out of favor with people (even NTs). I learned this in my population geography class.

I am hoping that there are still some traditionalists out there when it comes to starting a family. If I end up with someone who already has kids from previous relationships, I would still try to father an additional child if it's possible.



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21 Feb 2009, 2:32 pm

The planet is getting overpopulated, if I would ever consider raising a kid, which is quite unlikely, I would at least adopt a kid. Those who breed children are not aware of the effects it will have for the future.


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21 Feb 2009, 2:46 pm

I have 2 kids, one ASD and one "NT". But I had my tubes tied and couldn't imagine life with having more than 2 kids! I feel like I have to babysit myself as well many times! Can get overwhelming.



Ana54
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21 Feb 2009, 2:53 pm

I have one. Don't know if he's on the spectrum. I'm sure he'd fit in with people on the spectrum, though; he seems somehow like he would even though he's only 2 months old and you'd say it's impossible to tell. I plan to raise him in the Aspie culture, anyway.



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21 Feb 2009, 3:21 pm

No kids.. ever.

I hate them.. disgusting creatures filled with diseases and ickyness..


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21 Feb 2009, 4:12 pm

Exile wrote:
Didn't claim they did. I use my own criteria occasionally. I BELIEVE that red or auburn hair is a factor. No proof, however. Just speculation.



interesting you should say that becasue my mom is a redhead . sometimes i think she might be autistic.