I hate the concept of "social skills"

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People with cerebral palsy can't control their facial muscles to let people know what they're thinking and that they are paying attention, and the impression this gives is that they are mentally ret*d. I know that I was guilty of thinking that way until someone told me about it.

It's even more complicated with me, because I can physically control those muscles. I just don't have the instincts that are necessary to do it consistently.

And most people don't want to know anything so complicated. Anything that doesn't fit in a sound bite is not heard at all, and what little you can say makes them uncomfortable enough that they need to condemn you.

NTs are like a bees: Where we see a dull, brown flower, the bee sees a pretty color in the ultra-violet spectrum that stands out by a mile. Meanwhile, the bees miss things in the spectrum that are visible to us.

That's it. I finally figured out why Temple Grandin gives me the creeps. When she makes an analogy like that, she turns it around and puts herself in the role of the lower life form. She would be the bee in my analogy. She happily accepts the position of the groveling, "Uncle Tom." (Would you like me to demonstrate my tap dance?)

Forget any analogy to echolocation. No NT will ever sit through it, so why bother developing it...

Social skills are as variable as accents, for the same reasons; I.e. the guy in the next street or school isn't like YOU!

Think for yourselves!

I dunno.

The following are a list of "social skills" that are expected/taught to kiddies at school. For those that are interested, I've put my current level of competence by each one. It's not an even picture, but I don't think it's necessarily a bad picture either. I used to be a lot worse than I am now, which proves at that the skills can be learned to some extent.


-Cooperation
[Severe difficulties, can't keep up with the discussion, I want to work alone. I don't know how to go about this. The idea seems strange to me.]

-Sharing
[If it's handing out treats or drinks to others I'm fine. If it's sharing an object that I'm studying intensely/being creative with there's a problem]

-Participation
[Severe difficulties syncing up with others. Overwhelmed in large group situations. Function better when clear rules are in place e.g. sports activities]

-Being a Friend
[Brilliant at this when not under extreme stress or pressure]

-Helping Others
[Brilliant at this]

-Being Patient
[Varies]

-Following Directions
[Easier if the the instructions are written down or expressed visually]

-Taking Turns
[Bad at this, often feel resentment that I can't do something for longer because there isn't enough equipment]

-Remaining on Task
[Brilliant at this]

-Accepting Differences
[Brilliant at this]

-Listening
[Brilliant at this]

-Praising Others and Refraining from Put Downs
[Brilliant at this]

-Positive Communication and Interactions
[Good at this in one to one situations. Deteriorates if complex emotions are involved or there are too many in the group to keep track of. Can be confusing not knowing when to speak, talking over people inadvertently etc.]

-Being Polite and Courteous
[Brilliant at this]

-Using Good Manners
[Good at this until someone points out that I've said something impolite inadvertently]

-Respecting Ourselves, Others and Items
[Brilliant at this]

-Being Respectful
[Brilliant at this]


So I'm not daft. I notice that my social skills are better in calmer, more relaxed, less crowded situations though.