You Might be an Aspie if...

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You know you're an aspie when -- your shrink doesn't want to discuss all the aspie-like actions that screwed up your life. Of course the shrink says "You must think about the future."

Are all shrinks bureaucrats?

You know you're an aspie when someone gives you a present and you analyze the folds on the wrapping paper before you open it.

You know you are an aspie when . . .

you use words such as lexicon appropriately and regularly

you wonder why people do not know the word lexicon

find touching soft things irresistible

can remember every word of your favorite song but forget to change your shoes and end up in slippers on the store

cant remember to put on a bra but will keep a sketchbook with you at all times

fret over something said three weeks ago when no one remembers anymore

have your own system for storing spoons and plastic cups, but forget to do the dishes

you know your are a aspie, when your birthday, is one of the years most streesfull days

You know you're are an aspie when....
...no one seem to notice your presence, or raise an eyebrow to your beg for help or answer back when you speak... until you mumble or do something awkward or stupid which of course is suddenly heard and seen with great attention by virtually everybody across the room

... People think you must be going away... when actually your huge bag is just filled with all the things you MIGHT need on any average day:-$

You know you're an Aspie when... you meet someone for the first time. The first question they ask is "do you have Autism?"

...You know vast amounts of information on nearly every subject, but have no idea how a social interaction is supposed to work.

...You compile a handbook of commonly used slang, social procedures, and the like, and yet still have the problem listed above.

...Everybody you know says you are exactly like Sheldon (Big Bang Theory) and you begin to wonder if the writers for the show are following you around looking for ideas.

ok i'm not technically diagnosed, i mean clinically diagnosed with
aspergers, but i think i have it, plus my half sister has it...
so i'm not a good joker person, sometimes i am, ok,
....you know you're an aspie when.....(harsh punchline came to mind,
don't wanna say it)....
........when (thinking seriously now).....(this is why im not a good joker)...
but maybe i can say something that is relatable to someone......
(this is a pretty long set up) <-- that was funny to me, as this is getting
dragged on, OKAY......is this aspie behavior??
ummm.....
when you get your clothes out of the dryer and you
have a lot of lint and dust on your clothes cuz you don't
clean that screen thing often and now your clothes,
especially your black ones have dust on them and you
don't have a lint roller so you feel embarassed but what
are you gunna do you like those clothes so you wear them
anyway and pick stuff off of you all day : )
ok i made myself laugh at least, not lol but smile

You know you're an aspie when...

...Somebody asks you, "What are they building here?" and your response is, "A building."

...You find yourself analyzing every license plate on every car you see pass while riding the bus.

...You often have no idea what's so funny, but you do a forced chuckle because everyone else is laughing.

...You spend all day researching Southern California freeways on Wikipedia, and yet you don't drive or live in Southern California.

...You find the clock on the wall more interesting than what cute thing somebody's pet did today.

...People tell you that you always speak either too softly or too loudly, and you aren't even aware of it.

...You're confused when someone can't remember an event at all while you can remember it perfectly."

You know you are an Aspie when you keep coming back to the WrongPlanet because you feel like you belong here.