You Might be an Aspie if...

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When in high school, each time you got caught on your phone and had it taken up, it wasn't from texting your buddies. It was because you were looking up and reading about your special interests on mobile internet.

You've got this week-end off work, and you're hoping and praying that you don't get called in if someone is off sick, not because you are selfish or lazy, but because the week-ends are a luxury to you and it's one of the only things in life you've got to look forward to, but nobody can understand that, they only think you are being selfish and lazy, when actually you enjoy your week-ends off so much because you do your Sunday charity work, which you enjoy and would do it every day if you got paid for it. (OK, that may not be that Aspie-related).

You wish the bus services were free because catching the buses is part of your special interest.

You get funny looks (even from other Aspies) when you say you wish you were an old aged pensioner, because then you'd have a free travel pass and wouldn't have to work at all if you got a descent pension, and there is such a thing as being a healthy 60+ person.

You sit on your laptop in your bedroom with your earplugs in your ears when everyone's coming in from work because the irritating noise of their greeting and chattering outside your bedroom door is too distracting.

...you are perfectly content to spend Valentine's day alone in your bedroom, working on homework.

...you don't look at the presenter in the eye, you do something with your fingers, but you are following him (and others think you don't or that you are bored or disrespectful).

O yeah, I can relate.

...you get chased around by annoying younger members of the opposite gender who want nothing more than to go out with you, even after you tell them that you're older.

I wish I had this problem.

... you encounter figures from your past, particularly old teachers who treated you like dirt, treat you the same.

you know that much about a place your going to visit you could be a tour guide when you arrive.

you can talk endlessly about the place your going to visit to anyone who will listen

When you hunch and look at the ground alot when you walk and get emotionally drained at the end of the day after dealing with lots of people and go home and browse Youtube for hours on end!

Your understanding is so different that other people can't see what you mean no matter how much you explain.

you were asked a question and cannot understand why the asker became annoyed when you gave them a full and comprehensive answer.

Your explanation of a simple computer function involves the description of fishing and nets, the logic of which makes perfect sense in your head.

Your family cannot understand that not taking a job because you can't stand people coming at you all day is nothing to do with shyness. It's due to the fact that every one of those people could require a conversation and that every conversation could lead to an infinite amount of possibilities for which you may or may not have learned the proper response and the level of alertness required for this is just plain draining.

Its ok if you want to come over to my house on Wednesday morning but please warn me by at least Monday evening or be prepared that I may just show you what a mini meltdown looks like.

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Shop assistant says ,' your getting your usual again I see'.

Me to boyfriend, 'I love you but do you see the queue for that spaceship over there, that's right the one taking the entire planet for a nice week-long vacation. Please join (but please come back, I need you very much and I will be in a much calmer state when you return, promise)".

Boyfriend to me, 'Is it me or are you listening to a cooling fan on your headphones?'.

You can recognize that a person is happy by observing how part of the lower eyelid pulls up near the inside corner of the eye when the typical NT responds to it without being aware of what they are responding to.

Same here, that is why it pisses me off to no end when my moms boyfriend gets on me about not having picked up the phone when I have told him repeatedly that is an issue I have that he'll just have to deal with besides if he wants it answered so bad he can do it....its not like I really receive too many calls. I usually have to leave the room to avoid throwing the phone at him or something.

... you buy two new pairs shoes in the exact same model and colour as the ones you're wearing and the woman working in the store looks at you and says "you like those shoes, huh?".

... writing a paper in Word (the program) at school and Word, throughout all your school years, insists on underlining what you've written with green lines and tell you that your language is too formal and that you should consider using other words instead.

Every situation you encounter calls for sharing a very detailed description of a similar situation experienced by a character in a movie or TV show.