The worst thing a bully has done to you

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I was bullied relentlessly growing up. I now understand that I acted strangely and came across as different, which really isn't any reason to bully someone, but the kids at my school obviously didn't think so.

I've been chased by people, hit intentionally with a hockey stick on my leg, thrown in mud and then spat on and then I was also dragged outside wearing only my underwear. The headteacher gave them a warning for that one unbelievably.

Two years ago I was bullied by a work colleague because I was doing my job too slowly and he made my life hell and then another colleague kept bumping in to me on purpose and put his hands in my private area.

Yikes. Did you sue the guy?

I only ever suffered physical violence in Primary School. There was an incident where another "classmate" stole my wallet. There was a lot of verbal abuse, mostly being wrongly identified as gay. I was also ostracized from the rest of my class, by teachers and other pupils alike.

I don't think I've been bullied in my adult life. There have been some nasty remarks and people I definitely shouldn't of been around, but never anything persistent.

Yes I did and I got compensation from my boss which is good. But the atmosphere at work was horrible which is why I left there, I don't think I would have enjoyed it again even if they had left.

Faith,

I don't blame you one bit. That was a toxic environment and the guy who did that was an idiot. You're much better off away from them.

Ty, yes I agree completely. It was a horrible time working there and the grief they put me through was horrible. It got so bad that I was dreading going to work every day, but I had to for the money. I’m a lot happier where I am now as well which is good. I did almost fall in to a low state after but in the end I told myself to pull myself together, no way was I getting in a state because of something horrible they did. I’m so much happier in my new job and my colleagues treat me nicely.

Nice to meet you btw.

remind me that i'm omega.

Spit on me.

Faith,

Thank you for the kind words. Nice to meet you, too.

Being an Autistic child and enduring a mainstream school system of being constantly bullied every day destroyed my self esteem and confidence. Autistic children belong in special schools not mainstream schools. Autistic children need safe environments free from abuse and bullying from non-autistic children Zero tolerance towards bullying needs to be implemented to ensure autistic children's feeling are not hurt.

I was bullied for 9 years of my life and that was during my first 9 school years. It was mostly only the girls in my class who bullied me, the boys ignored me which I did not mind.
I was extremely shy but I tried to make friends with the other girls my own way. Occasionally i'd say something to them or ask something and I tried hanging out with them on breaks and lunch and often they'd literally yell into my face to leave them alone. They were also very manipulative.

Some days they'd pretend that they were gonna let me into their friend group and be super nice to me. They'd ask me to hang out with them after school only to bully me again the next day. They'd ask if they could come visit me the next day after school only to when that day came tell me to leave them alone and that they were not gonna hang out with me when I waited for them. They would also tell me that they had thought about inviting me to something they'd done on the weekend but changed their minds because I am so boring to be around. It went on and on like that. They'd also take pieces of my clothing and throw it on the ground outside or hide it, or just simply make fun of my clothing. They were all rich kids... I was definietely not.

From the start it was mostly only one or two of the girls in my class who did that. I remember when I was alone with one of them she'd always try to make friends with me but as soon as the others came and joined us she'd start acting like she hated me again.

It was so sick now that I look back at it. I struggle very much to forgive as I still feel physically nauseus if I ever see any of them around which luckily I haven't for years now though. But forgiveness is the only way to be in control again. I'd never let them know they're forgiven though.

As for the last batch of bullies in my life whom I last saw in real life in 2016, we're actually still in contact, but barely. When I talked to them in a group chat on Facebook, I found that I could actually talk to them as long as I keep them at arm's length. The way I see it, they were meritocrats to an extreme. I was prone to getting angry and getting stressed to the point it affected group projects, and they had this belief that if you're not contributing to anything with your talents, you're not worth being afforded basic human decency. In the past, I have been extremely savage with them in my fantasies: I have wished AIDS, cancer, and Nazi death camps on them inside my own mind. But uh, it's not worth it, they're not Hitler or Stalin, they're just unaware of their own ghastliness and merely up their own asses instead of being utterly devoid of humanity.

BTW, if you want to know what is one for me, look for the "accidental condescension" thread. At this point in time, I am literally inches away from being a normie except for some anger issues and repetitive interests, but I have this crippling fear that people think I have some kind of mental retardation. After all, I am in special school and am not as extroverted as I could be. Some people never got the accidental condescension 'cause they act like they're inches away from being NT, but I did for some reason. To be fair, I haven't gotten that kind of treatment in a couple of weeks, have I finally proven myself? BTW, I know some members here are also special teachers themselves, I think they could give an insight on how a special teacher could tell someone's functioning level.

The thing that hurt me the most was definitely the psychological torture. Just being made to feel like you are less worthy of respect than others can be so damaging. The worst thing that was ever done to me by a bully? That's gonna take a bit of explaining, I think.

So I had this friend called John. He was in my school but I actually met him for the first time when I moved house and he became my neighbour. We became really close and I also became friends with his friends and it was the first time in my life that I actually had a group of friends. I was over the moon. Usually, I only had 1 or 2 friends, if I was lucky. But now I had like 6. And I really thought that things would get better for me at school. But one day, John and I started arguing and I can't remember what over now but we did. From what I recall, we were really at each other's throats. And then, all of a sudden, he just changed. He turned into one of my bullies, and the worst one I had at that. He would verbally abuse me every single chance he got - and we took the bus to a school together so that was a lot! He called me ugly, slut, basically every name under the sun. I will never forget crying on the way to school, trying to sit as far away from him as I could as he relentlessly tortured me. Now, I was still friends with John's brother and all of mine and John's mutual friends at that point. And John didn't like that. One by one, he turned every single person we knew in school against me. He caused arguments and made me feel like I was worth nothing. I had nobody by the time he was finished, he had ruined my life and I honestly wanted to die. I think it was one of the final nails in the coffin for me to be honest and about a year later, I was diagnosed with depression and social anxiety disorder caused by all the bullying I received in the school.

Also, it always shocked me how little the teachers cared. Their job was to protect kids and yet, they threw me to the side like rubbish. My head of year (who was also my science teacher and thus, witnessed so much of the bullying) even joined in on the bullying at one point and when my mum confronted her, she blamed all of the bullying on me. Apparently, I made myself a target by being quiet and a loner. According to teachers in both primary and secondary school, I didn't try to make friends and that's why people bullied me. It was my fault. I can't tell you how many times they had the audacity to move me to a different class even though I was the one being bullied. I also can't tell you how many times I found myself forced to move schools. I dropped out of school at 14 years old because I was self-harming and suicidal as all hell due to everything that had been happening to me. Instead, I ended up going to a community centre to finish my schooling whilst I saw a psychiatrist and anxiety nurse at the hospital and took anti-depressants everyday. At 14.

Somewhat recently, I heard that a girl took a knife to the same school that I dropped out of to defend herself from bullies and someone got stabbed, so the teachers there still haven't learnt. Hmph.

Oh, and you are definitely not the only one who is still affected by bullying. I haven't seen any of my bullies in well over 6 years, and yet I still have nightmares about that school to this day. My mum can't understand why I'm still so hung up on it but I think you don't understand unless you experience the trauma that comes with bullying like that. I really don't think that I would be as unconfident and insecure as I am if it wasn't for being bullied. I will likely never truly love and accept myself because I was never told by anyone outside of my family that I deserved to.

Diatribes, hyperbole and polemics about things outside of my control; maybe one day I'll be here with a more clear head.