The site where they BASH Aspie husband and wives. :O

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I guess either alex changed the feature to where only members can post or that is only done in the autism politics section because that is where I posted as a guest not even realizing I was not logged in. This forum keeps logging me out. I decided to check the box to automatically log me in for each visit and I hope this works.

Dianthus you made a really cogent point there (as you often do

Great discussion here, I think it is helpful for us all to see how some NT's view us. Hopefully, these individuals represent a very small minority...it really does make you wonder.

I find it bizarre that Aspies get married at all, because the very thought of it to me is worse than death, although I usually don't have a problem with other people getting married (as long as it's out of mutual love and all the rest of that sappiness).

Seriously, spending the rest of your life with someone you're supposed to go to bed with? That how viruses are spread! And then they get really sick with the flu and are even puking and I'm a horrible person for not wanting to be even in the same city with them until they're better...maybe not even then. Yeah, I got a shot in the fall but apparently that was a waste of time because the flu strains out now are not the ones I was vaccinated against.

I hate being around sick people and I really hate having to worry that every item I touch could be infected when out in public this time of year. I've been even having bad dreams at night. Today I did some shopping because I'm really stir-crazy from being inside so much because of all the freaking snow, and then I touched my eye and didn't realize it until it was too late. How long have I got? Sorry for the rant.

Hmm, well hubby and I do these parallel activities kraftiekortie mentioned.... All day every day. Our "together time" is in the bed haha sorry joking aside... I think I care more about how he looks after the house and how often he cooks, remembers to take out the trash, tells me what he did that day than what we actually do together. We're both gamers and our downtime is usually spent on the same game, World of Warcraft until recently since his account is messed up. Sometimes I feel guilty that I can play and he can't, though he just got a new game so it's been easier, we also got a new TV too.

I am aspie female with NT programming; it's very strange to have this war within me that loves my independence and feels also at the same time obligated to pressure my hubby into spending "quality time" with me (whatever that is), sometimes I read those sites and wonder why my man isn't spontaneously romantic and whatnot-- truth is, no man really is, that's a fairy tale. I'd rather have my down-to-earth reliable man than some wishy washy doing whatever he thinks I want type man. That's my wiring though, I'm not entirely sure most women (or men) know what they want in a relationship and it's a constantly evolving concept for most people, NT and aspie.

For those aspies that don't want physical closeness or the intimacy of a long-term relationship, that's totally fine. They will be happy too if they don't yearn for something they didn't want in the first place. Those of us that want relationships, we know that we have to change a bit or find another aspie, so in all I think things do work out and the negatives we hear about are the same thing as negative reviews on products/services, the most displeased talk the most, the most pleased generally don't storm the forums telling about how awesome their spouse is! Just think of that. The negatives are the minority. That should provide some consolation.

My wife told me to stop reading the spouse forums, they were just getting me upset when we weren't in trouble with each other. She says she will TELL me if there's a problem--one of the big reasons we've been together so long (20 years) is she's always honest and tells me what she thinks, even if it can be hard to hear. I do tend to get wrapped up in my Interests too much though. I'm still trying to find a balance, where she gets "me time" and i get Interest time to help me unwind.

And she's got stuff to work on too--she's bipolar, and just now getting back into therapy and adjusting her meds after years of being paranoid delusional. She's been telling me how the government is bugging our phones and computers and trying to kill her, and i have NO flippin' idea what to say to that. All I know how to do is to debate each belief logically, but delusions don't respond to logic. She just gets mad and says I'm not supporting her. When she talks that way, i just want to hide in the corner with my laptop.