You Might be an Aspie if...

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You write 188 pages for your ASD Developmental History, because you're a "details" person.
You get it professionally bound.
It has photos and an appendix.

...when you arrive at the top of a set of stairs you've never climbed before and are disappointed that they are an uneven number.

... people find you strange and animals accept you as equals.

...you notice every mistake in the pattern of the pavement stones in the pedestrian zone and really, really want to fix them.

...when the police drive by with sirens blaring and you're torn between plugging your ears because of the excruciating pain and the bliss of getting to hear the doppler effect.

You remember the scent of everything, in every photo from your life.
That includes clothes, books, albums, rooms, other people, even the air.

You make connections between ideas, words, memories, songs, senses (etc.) at warp speed.
Everything reminds you of something.

Your mind catalogues memories by using a sensory lexicon.
You can't explain the memory in narrative format but you know every smell and texture.

You are always over- or under-stimulated.
Your nickname should be "Too" because everything is "too ......" (like Goldilocks).

You are doing the same gestures, mannerisms, and stims in your baby pictures that you do today.
You are incapable of wearing socks, especially on your left foot (since infancy).
I used to leave a sock trail all over the house.
As soon as my mother put them on, I'd pull them off (left foot first).

...you express a desire to be in a relationship with someone who may be already married.

If you don't like change and get agitated because your bride sprung schedule disruptions on you at the last minute...and when she then offers to change things back to the original plan you get agitated because that would be a change.

...you think that a maximum of three words is more than appropriate to get through the check-out at the supermarket.
Hi.
card.
bye.
I usually shorten this by just waving my bank card, but this is often met by a defiant stare to the tune of "If you don't say it, I'm just going to ignore you."

(back on topic.)

You Might Be An Aspie If...

...a cowboy asks you to help round up his 37 head of cattle, and you say, "40".

...nobody laughs at your jokes until someone else repeats them.

...someone has asked you what your favorite season is, and you answered "six".

...you actually enjoyed filling out reading logs in elementary school.

...you are a legal adult who owns a Nerf gun.

...you are wary when people offer you berries in case they might be Nightlock.

...you can read and write using the Aurebesh alphabet.

...you do not care where your family goes as long as you do not have to go with them.

...you greet friends with the Vulcan "Live Long and Prosper".

...you have ever argued the 14th digit of pi.

...you have memorized Aragorn's speech from Return of the King.

...you have memorized the periodic table.

...you have memorized Walt Disney's Disneyland dedication speech.

...you have obsessed over whether Greedo or Han Solo shot first.

...you have skipped class to do homework.

...you know all the lyrics to the Psych theme song.

...you know that "magic always comes at a price".

...you never leave a Marvel movie until the very end of the post-credit scenes.

...you say ridiculous things to random people on the street.

...you sign up for a "General Calculus" class because your special interest is Imperial Roman war heroes.

...you went through a stage where you were obsessed with Sudoku.

...you went through a stage where you were obsessed with the Rubik cube.

...your spirit animal is Maurice Moss from The IT Crowd.

...you can relate to at least 90% of the posts in this thread and aren't sure if you should laugh or cry at half of them.