List one NT thing you do not understand.

Page 29 of 65 [ 1025 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 ... 65  Next

Hovis
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Jul 2006
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 936
Location: Lincolnshire, England

19 Jul 2010, 4:06 pm

Bells wrote:
I'm going to go with meeting someone once and speaking them for a short period about a common interest and suddenly becoming "friends". I don't understand how people can connect and get oh so close within the course of five-fifteen minutes!! !


It takes me a very, very long time before I think of someone as a friend. I've been astonished when someone introduced me to a third party as 'my friend'. As far as I was concerned, we were casual acquaintances.



astaut
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,777
Location: Southeast US

19 Jul 2010, 6:09 pm

book_noodles wrote:
I know I've said this a lot :oops: but it really confuses me.. when girls go the the bathroom in groups.


Lol I do this...not in groups, but sometimes two of us will go together. It's only if we don't want to stop out conversation or because otherwise the one of us would be left standing alone.

I don't understand:
1. if you talk too much, you're annoying; if you talk too little, you're shy or weird
2. dating for pure entertainment
3. passive aggressiveness
(of course, these aren't strictly NT things)


_________________
After a time, you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing, after all, as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true.
--Spock


TheDoctor82
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Feb 2008
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,400
Location: Sandusky, Ohio

20 Jul 2010, 12:59 am

astaut wrote:
book_noodles wrote:
I know I've said this a lot :oops: but it really confuses me.. when girls go the the bathroom in groups.


Lol I do this...not in groups, but sometimes two of us will go together. It's only if we don't want to stop out conversation or because otherwise the one of us would be left standing alone.

I don't understand:
1. if you talk too much, you're annoying; if you talk too little, you're shy or weird
2. dating for pure entertainment
3. passive aggressiveness
(of course, these aren't strictly NT things)


the dating thing totally blows my mind.

In fact, to paraphrase Pat Buttram from Back to the Future III: "dating--for fun?! !! ! what the hell kind of fun is that?!"



starquake
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jul 2009
Gender: Robot
Posts: 122

20 Jul 2010, 1:14 pm

DANCING!

no really, I simply cannot get the point behind why it is so important to move "rythmically" in funny poses with others.



rmctagg09
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 13 Mar 2008
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 422
Location: Brooklyn, NY

20 Jul 2010, 3:27 pm

Two-faced behavior, and the habit of some NT's to talk about others when they're in the same room.



AmberEyes
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,438
Location: The Lands where the Jumblies live

21 Jul 2010, 8:39 am

krill wrote:
Potential to act more like them, is all too often my take on it.


There's now a whole culture of worshipping potential.
It's a culture of saying: "You have to improve your weaknesses and aim high."

Maybe, in the old days the attitude was:
"Use what you've got to survive."

Now it's:
"You need to desire and aquire items and personality traits that you don't have to thrive."
"Fix your weakenesses to become a fuller human being."

Before, it was all about what you have got and what you can use.

Now, the ideology is more about aiming for what you don't have.

Big difference.



violetchild
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 5 Jul 2010
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 140
Location: Australia

21 Jul 2010, 8:47 am

I do not understand their "friends" stuff. Ive been called a friend by NTs at times and still are.. but then they dont treat me like what i believe a friend is. They seem so superficial.. and it appears they call those who they treat as more like aquaintences as friends.

I also dont understand why they lie so much or decieve.



asplanet
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Nov 2007
Age: 65
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,258
Location: Cyberspace, New Zealand

21 Jul 2010, 8:50 am

Why on earth they want me to slow down, when its them that not keep up!


_________________
Face Book "Alyson Fiona Bradley "


bee33
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Apr 2008
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,614

21 Jul 2010, 10:33 am

violetchild wrote:
I do not understand their "friends" stuff. Ive been called a friend by NTs at times and still are.. but then they dont treat me like what i believe a friend is. They seem so superficial.. and it appears they call those who they treat as more like aquaintences as friends.

I also dont understand why they lie so much or decieve.
I agree completely. They want "friends" as people to hang out with and chat, so they don't have to go to the movies by themselves. But if you are ever hurt or distraught and need someone to listen or help you, then you become tiresome and annoying and their so-called friendship vanishes.

I agree with the second part as well. And I would add, why don't they care if another person is deceitful or manipulative? They just shrug it off, and you're the one making waves for bringing it up. Then the "friendship" they had with you instantly vanishes, once again.



rmctagg09
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 13 Mar 2008
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 422
Location: Brooklyn, NY

21 Jul 2010, 10:44 am

bee33 wrote:
violetchild wrote:
I do not understand their "friends" stuff. Ive been called a friend by NTs at times and still are.. but then they dont treat me like what i believe a friend is. They seem so superficial.. and it appears they call those who they treat as more like aquaintences as friends.

I also dont understand why they lie so much or decieve.
I agree completely. They want "friends" as people to hang out with and chat, so they don't have to go to the movies by themselves. But if you are ever hurt or distraught and need someone to listen or help you, then you become tiresome and annoying and their so-called friendship vanishes.

I agree with the second part as well. And I would add, why don't they care if another person is deceitful or manipulative? They just shrug it off, and you're the one making waves for bringing it up. Then the "friendship" they had with you instantly vanishes, once again.

I know what you guys mean, as I've experienced it, but not all NT's are like that.



kate123A
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Feb 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 536
Location: the twilight zone

21 Jul 2010, 11:10 am

I don't understand why I have to ask people about them.....when I'd rather talk about my special interest......and why do people object to me rocking it calms me down.



AmberEyes
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,438
Location: The Lands where the Jumblies live

22 Jul 2010, 6:19 am

Vague statements.
Such as:

"Candidates should have excellent communication skills."

What kind of communication skills exactly?

Written English? Sign language? Foreign languages? Public speaking? Chit chatting? Emailing? Telephoning? Visual artistic? Computer graphical (graphs, spreadsheets etc)? Running errands? Social networking? Computer programming? Mathematical logical? Scientific diagrams? Visual animation (motion graphs)? Film making? Interviewing? Coaching? Dancing? Report writing? Touch? Gesturing? Prosody? Paraverbal signals? Verbal information? Sending your grandma a Birthday card?

Communication skills is a very broad subject.
Someone could be highly adept at drawing flow charts, yet struggle to explain these diagrams to a crowded room of people.

My question is would this person have "good communication skills"?

What does the statement "good communication skills" really mean?

Would a monolingual fluent English speaking person have poor communication skills if s/he was told that s/he had to write a report in Japanese?

Or does "having good communication skills" mean that you have to master the dominant form of communication. Would that mean that you'd have to use written language when told, even though you might prefer to draw a picture or diagram?

What if you're brilliant at informational and mathematical communication. If you struggle to make casual banter with your colleagues, would that make you a "bad communicator"?

The statement: "Excellent communication skills" is often accompanied by the statements "Excellent numeracy skills" and "Excellent teamworking skills".

I have a question, how come everyone was brilliantly competant and "well rounded" in all these areas before they can work effectively in a team?

What about delegation?
What if the good social communicators helped out the good informational communicators.
Why not have each member specialise in one style of communication instead of expecting everyone to be superhuman?

I don't understand a lot about teamwork. It baffles me.
What if my excellent communication skills are the wrong communication skills?

People compassionately working together sharing the load and making up for individual "deficits"?

Is that what teamwork is all about or have I got that completely wrong?



Exclavius
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 May 2010
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 632
Location: Ontario, Canada

22 Jul 2010, 8:40 pm

Obsessions with "brand names"

Maybe most aspies have the same obsession to, but if you want me to wear a t-shirt with Nike or something on it... Give me standard billboard rates and away we go. Otherwise dream on..

Every buy a Ralph Loren t-shirt at the sally-ann and sit there with a seam ripper removing the dude playing polo on it? Then just to find out that it's less faded there and have the throw the dang thing out?



AmberEyes
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,438
Location: The Lands where the Jumblies live

23 Jul 2010, 2:07 am

Shops playing loud distracting Muzak/pop music.

The unneccessary noise makes it impossible to concentrate.

I end up analysing song structure/messages when I try to buy things.

The music also makes it difficult for the shopper to communicate with the cashier: there's a "wall of sound" in the way.



Ford_Prefect
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2008
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 48
Location: Born on Betelgeuse 5, now central Europe

23 Jul 2010, 12:00 pm

AmberEyes wrote:
Shops playing loud distracting Muzak/pop music.

The unneccessary noise makes it impossible to concentrate.

I end up analysing song structure/messages when I try to buy things.

The music also makes it difficult for the shopper to communicate with the cashier: there's a "wall of sound" in the way.


I also don't understand why some people wants to be surrounded by noise. I hate teenagers playing mp3s on their cellphones on the steet, I don't understand cyclists or inline skaters with headphones. My colleagues at work are still listening to local radio station (stupid pop-music) and I am not able to concentrate when I must do something in their offices. Fortunately I have my own room in my work.


_________________
Castaway on Earth.
Excuse my English, please. My real name is H*Y*M*A*N K*A*P*L*A*N :-)


AmberEyes
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,438
Location: The Lands where the Jumblies live

24 Jul 2010, 2:21 am

When you're a pedestrian:

Drivers waving at you to cross the road at a busy junction.

When the drivers (oncoming traffic) have priority and there's no pedestrian crossing.

This is dangerous.
Traffic builds up behind the driver who's trying to wave you across. If you don't cross a driver may sound his horn and make you jump. He may also yell rudely at you out of the window to cross the road even when you aren't supposed to.

I can understand why this kind of behaviour is against highway rules.
It may seem "charitable" on the part of the driver, but it could cause accidents and confuse other road users.

I don't mind waiting a little bit longer to cross a road and crossing the road when it's clear and safe.

Apparently some drivers do mind if I don't cross the road "illegally".
They get irritated and filled with road rage if I don't.
Some drivers seem to be in a rush to get everywhere.
Some drivers try and wave me across while they're chatting on their handheld phones.