Quit whining and just do it.

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You like to hang out in the restroom longer than you need to? I've been thinking in the context of say when I'm at a basketball game, half time hits, everybody rushes the bathrooms, I want to give people with difficulty moving around the venue as much leeway to be back in their seat before the second half as possible. I don't want to have Joe end up being the very last person to make it to the line, have to wait until the whole line cycle through, and by the time he's able to make it back to his seat we're already five minutes into the third quarter. Joe is already working harder to get around a venue mostly designed for bipedal people than said bipeds. To me special treatment is giving someone advantages over others, not making allowances for extra needs. Fairness is an even playing field, when you have an infrastructure oriented towards people that are one way that makes somebody who is not that way need to expend more effort to get the same task done as the people it was designed for, you take steps to reduce their burden.

AlMightyAl, first and foremost many people here on the spectrum each have different life scenarios whereby, everyone is capable of doing some things while not good at others,.This is quite realistic if you ask me for, I may not be the best Aspie in social terms yet, I'm able to get my point across without coming off as being overbearing or tyrant-like.. Personally, I've learned a great deal from how others here deal with various situations in life and try to adapt it to my own life..


ProfessorX

No I don't but it's the way it is. There are things I don't like like such waiting for my food, waiting in lines, paying for food, spending lot of money on one item. That's why I hardly buy new videogames and I usually buy them used and that's why I hardly bought any new clothes and only got them from thrift stores or goodwill. If I don't like the price, don't buy it. If I don't want to wait in a long line, leave and forget the stuff I"m buying or screw going to the bathroom. I'll go somewhere else. Sometimes I wish everything was a dollar in the world but does that mean I should have everything be a dollar for me while everyone else has to suffer paying more for things they need or want? That's how I see all this.

Don't people in wheelchairs get pushed in their chairs? I have seen people do it to their loved ones or friends. Joe can have that opportunity and he won't be the last person in line and the last person back because he had help from his family or friends getting to the restroom.


From reading your last post, you seem to have your own definition of special treatment. What I learned about it when I heard it is expecting special privileges because you are different or something. Lot of people mix special treatment and accomodations up by viewing them both the same. A diabetic bringing his insulin needles on the plane is not special treatment, it's a accommodation or special need you can call it. It would be special treatment if they were allowed other sharp objects on the plane while the rest have to suffer giving up their sharp items at the x ray machines. See the difference between special needs and special treatment?

It bugs me when people, call things such as places having ramps for wheelchair people or them coming on the bus and people having to move out of their seats for the wheelchair person "special treatment." That's not how I learned the word when I was taught it. I was even bothered when my boyfriend called hearing aides special treatment They can't help it, they need them to hear or would they rather be hard of hearing? It's not like they are asking for different rules like "charge me everything for a dollar because I don't want to spend lot of my money on things I need" or "I can be an as*hole all I want and it should be okay because I have hearing problems because I'm special." "I don't want to wait in the long lines at Disneyland so please let me in the front of the line, look at my hearing aid."

Does it really make more sense to you to suggest the Joe must always have somebody around to push him in his wheelchair than to just say he shows up, uses the stall designed to reduce the burden of getting situated on a toilet engineered for somebody not dependent on a chair for mobility, and heads back to his seat with some extra leeway to reduce the burden of being restricted to wheels in a world of stairs? He has to circle around to the specific ramp area that are chair accessible, in a lot of venues that had to be retrofitted, moving a wheelchair around can be absolutely re DONK YOU LUSS.

We are talking about an uneven playing field where the infrastructure is biased in favor of "the norm" so we are making accommodation to make the burden experienced more equal.

I'm quite confused by this thread, lol. There seems to be a lot of sarcasm. Maybe I will come back to it O_O

I was nice enough to label my sarcasm for your reading comfort.

It's not me at the half time at any sporting event! I am talking about in the work place. There are no people in wheelchairs on my floor at the office. We use the large stall as a usual simply because it is there and you can actually have a bit of room to wiggle. At sporting events and concerts I see men go zipping in and out of the restroom because they are not restrained by nature to bare the whole pelvic area whilst relieving themselves. Slipping over to the men's to use the more rarely used stools there is a social (and civic, I believe) no-no. So the alter abled don't just stop and end at using a wheel chair.

When I read the anecdote about coming out of the accessibility stall and finding a person in a wheel chair who was upset you had been making them wait for you to finish when you didn't need the additional support it provides, it reminded me of people parking in the accessibility parking spot at the entrance to a store because they are only going to be a minute. If we change the scenario to a taco bell restaurant that has one unisex bathroom that has one toilet that one person uses at a time that happens to be engineered for accessibility, I have no expectation that somebody in a wheelchair, or on crutches with a leg cast should be getting priority. I still would likely offer it to them myself. Like I said, I personally offer cuts in far more instances than I would expect someone else to. I just am generally in less of a hurry than people around me.

It is all Golden Rule, I'm just thinking if I was in that situation would I want somebody to make the offer? Then I'm going to offer it. In office environments where there tended to be a line outside the women's room and a completely empty men's room I've heard of policy being to have the women use the men's room. For liability reasons a manager has to come stand out front and make sure no men go in while it is open to women, then the line clears and women are no longer allowed in the men's room. Special treatment or accommodations of a conscientious society?

actually, it isn't. The handicapped parking spot has consequences if a non licensed for the spot car parks there, 'even for a minute'. The handicapped toilet stall was not being used when I came into the bathroom and the other stalls were. Was I to stand and wait leaving the handicapped (I dislike that work, btw) stall empty in case someone with the need to use it comes in at any time? I have to wait until the next stall is empty, there are no instructions on the outside of the bathroom stall that only those in need of the extra room may use it.

I don't want to cause a problem for anyone, I just want to use the next stall that comes open.

The point of the comparison was specifically to point out that, yes, you are supposed stand and wait and leave the accessibility(my preferred word) stall open for somebody that has accessibility issues. This should not be something we need to create a penalty schedule for, start training stall guards or inspectors to patrol the restrooms to ticket you for using it without having an accessibility needs certification from a clinician. People who have a small child with them can easily be demonstrated to have an accessibility need and I don't expect people to have to make an appointment with a clinician to diagnose it as a legitimate need, it is self evident. I just don't want to wait is not an especially strong argument for why you should be able to use resources set aside for special needs. If you regularly find your place of work has crowded restrooms, they need to add more facilities for normal use.

At the end of the day we're picking nits. From a pragmatic stand point I entirely understand your view. You stand there thinking if I had just gone in and done my thing I'd be back at my desk already and nobody would have had to wait for me. I'll only be in it for a minute.

Wasn't Joe with you guys? You meantioned "we" in your story example.

and again I am telling you there is no one in our office that uses the handicapped stall. is it supposed to stand empty while I twitch and bounce waiting for the other two stalls to empty? and in the MENS bathroom there is only one stall and it is a handicapped stall.

arrrgh! never mind, we do what we have to.

My mum has very pronounced autistic traits, and was never diagnosed, which is why I think my autism went unnoticed throughout my childhood - I was simply deemed as taking after my mother.

Years later, working in care, I spotted how this was a major advantage in my life. I saw so many autistic people whose biggest disability was their parents. With the best of intentions, some parents, who get no special training, pick up the wrong end of the stick and go all out, change their entire household, to try to help their autistic child, and end up reinforcing behaviours and creating problems for themselves.

Or, in other words, a lot of autistic young people are brought up with the understanding that if they refuse to do a thing, and throw in a little autistic tantrum to boot, they get to do whatever they want.

And then, they try to take that into the real world with them. Big mistake!