Why do NTs turn nasty ...

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why thank you michip hee its always fun reading your responses as they are short to the point

Just befoe this topic dissappears and reverts down into the abyss of page 2 here's the final thought

People get angry, people get **ssed, get over it
I used to stress and worry about when people get angry at me but then I realise their life is ticking away as is mine I can be the bigger guy and just stay cool as ice or I can go all ablaze
You should not give a crap about it just concentrate at your life because not many people are going to help you

Um, you're saying the only reason there are special ed classes is because they would get picked on? Not because they learn in a manner so different that to try to teach them in a normal manner would fail?

I am an Aspie, I went to a public school. I got picked on a few times because of my smaller stature (which ended when they would push a little too far and I would hit back. A lot.), not because of my Asperger's. In case you haven't noticed, being bullied is not an autistic-only experience.

same experience put2rome

If you were in a special class just to avoid being bullied then its a bit sad ya know I was bullied for 14 years never reacted but I always knew it was jealousy or targetting
think it helps if the person is tenacious as well though I think if you fallto pieces if just gives them fuel iif you say nothing and have that dignant look in your eye they know they can say stuff to you or punch you but you still have diginity

It is also good life experience people say for an aspie I am incredibly tenacious and ballsy and I thank that to my bullies because if they said nothing and I fell to pieces constantly I would have depression and in a brutal honest kind of way be so far away and be a wreck I have attempted suicide self harm physichal stuff in some ways sexual jousting, in my experience you just gotta make lemonade of it all

You can either go crying in the corner and slash your wrists or you can stand like stone and take it as it comes, this is my advice for those being bullied at the moment

It's part of the reason and it's true. My mom taught school and we were discussing it and she told me part of the reason they aren't mainstreamed or allowed around kids in regular classes is because they get bullied too much and it's to protect them. Not the entire reason, but partly.

Yes and no.

I think it must be horrible growing up an AS female. My NT daughter is going through HELL at school right now, and if AS were added into that mix, I can't even imagine. Its so darn subtle the way girls do things that it goes right past all the adults watching.

My AS son really did not experience that. There were some instances of bullying, yes, but they were quickly dealt with and the problems did not recur.

But the girls really do grow up into better adults. Most of the time. The meaness is part of a learning process of some sort that even as an adult I have trouble understanding. But the process gets completed and things change.

Firstly, venting and discrimination are not synonymous. Neither is venting and bashing and hate speech. Don't take my word for it; here are some unbiased definitions:

VENTING: to give expression to strong feelings or opinions
DISCRIMINATION: unfair treatment of a person or group on the basis of prejudice
BASHING: To criticize (another) harshly, accusatorially, and threateningly
HATE-SPEECH: Bigoted speech attacking or disparaging a social or ethnic group or a member of such a group.

I am strongly against encouraging or ignoring discrimination, bashing and hate speech and if this venue is to take itself seriously, those who come here and those who oversee it would do well, in my opinion, to support ALL members to talk about their issues in productive ways, such as venting, story telling, question-and-answer threads, etc. To permit open discrimination helps no-one and perpetuates the MYTH that it is the NT world at large that has done the harm and not individual bullies, who are not here to answer for their crimes. Just as I hold no other aspie responsible for the things my aspie husband does, nor do I characterize the entire AS community as good-for-nothings when I'm hurt and angry at my aspie husband, I do not see why it is considered acceptable for hatred to be allowed to cloak itself in "venting". How would you receive this current venting I'm doing if I had framed it like this:

"All you aspies are a real pain in our collective NT butts. You're all stupid and you make me want to throw up! Why can't aspies just stop acting weird and get with the damn program? It's not like it's hard or something. But I suppose we're just stuck with all of you. It really sucks though."

(btw, writing that DID NOT FEEL GOOD! I'm shaking right now and I certainly feel worse for having done so)

THAT is NOT venting!! !! !! That is horrible, irresponsible HATE SPEECH!! ! HOW CAN ANYONE HEAL IF THAT'S ALLOWED TO GO ON UNCHECKED?! And is it really a service WP is providing for its terribly hurt aspie members to not give them NEW AND IMPROVED ways of expressing themselves that speak to the harm done and not just the ongoing suffering? Then people could change sentences like:

"Neurotypical people are predominantly not worth knowing." [Aspiewordsmith]

to...

"I can see now, when I look into my past, that the neurotypical people who hurt me back then were just not worth knowing. Therefore, no great loss that I didn't fit in with those losers."

The first sentence just dumps the author's pain into every sensitive person's lap who reads it with nowhere to go with it but either to take it in and personalize it, or attempt like crazy to "just let it go". But, I have news for you: it hurts even if we don't respond!! !! And telling us to just click off and go find some other thread WHERE WE ARE NOT BEING OPENLY TREATED LIKE DIRT just minimizes and trivializes OUR PAIN! In other words, aspies need to be safe here at the expense of NTs being unsafe (????) HOW IS THAT OK? AND HOW DOES THAT MAKE THINGS BETTER?? HOW DOES REVENGE ON THOSE WHO NEVER HURT YOU MITIGATE YOUR PAIN??

Ban me, I don't care. Someone has to stand up and tell the truth about the abominable practices here. It's atrocious and outrageous and DON'T ONE OF YOU DARE TRY TO SAY, "Oh, typical over-reacting NT!" because it's not fair to greet other people's pain with judgment and disdain.

I think that's just about all the energy I have to give this place the way it's set-up now. I'll lurk and if it stays this bad, I'll just move on. I'm sure a bunch of you are getting your jollies seeing me in so much pain over your ugliness. Well, you're just as nasty as the bullies who first harmed you and I'm not going to stand for it one more second.

I hope everyone on WP gets exactly what they need,
Feyhera

Exactly. 99.9999% of all kids or people get picked on at some stage. They can't all be Aspie.

I was bullied horrendusly (I know I spelt it wrong) by lots and lots of people for ages. And I'm just an average blue-eyed-blonde-haired boring old english girl.
It might be because they have red hair, be gay, black, straight, white, whatever.
Mankind unfortunately has nasty people wherever you look. It's best to just ignore these peope.

Every body is different somehow.
I was bullied because my parents got divorced and I turned in to this puny little blonde girl with no personality.
I was then bullied, at my other school, because I grew breasts and was seen as a sack of meat (I was also still boring, blonde, and not-in-the-money and so was seen as dirty.)

But everything works out fine in the end. Just stick your head up and find the good people.

Point being, I am AS and to be candid and truthful I don't feel a great deal of enthusiasm for anyone outside of my family. It's not just NTs. I use them as an example because I was around them in school and had to put up with their crap eight hours a day and it drove me crazy because they were such haters and whenever I was stupid enough to copy them I got in serious trouble while they could bully me whenever and for however long they wanted and no one cared.
But generally, being with others is not a good experience for me. I don't enjoy it or seek it out. If someone I didn't know went out of their way to be really nice to me and acted like they wanted to be around me and were nice to me without any bizarre, sinister ulterior motives I would think that's wonderful and would repay them back in so many ways. It's not like I am some evil person who shuns all people. It's just I never get that response from others. I usually get the negative so I have learned avoiding works wonders.

I'm not going to try and empathize here, I find being around others comforts me. However I will sympathize, as I know alot of similar people at my mum's college. I will say that noone is forcing you to socialize, and if you want to be in your own bubble that is fine. No worries. My brother is the same, almost, although he's just a bit of a geek.

Do you find being with other Aspie's discomforting?

I don't even know if I know any Aspies or if I have known them...I haven't known anyone irl with the kinds of social experiences I have encountered.

Well, in that case I do hope you find someone who you can connect with. We're not all nasty!
I must depart now. My boyfriend's nearly here. I bid you adieu and good luck XD

Well done, feyhera. I'm sick of it all too.

Don't know about most NTs but reading these angry posts gives me insight.


Yeah, me too. I sit in the middle when I read these, able to see the issue through the eyes of both sides, and still not be sure what to suggest.

um, thanks, Tom... I really don't feel better for saying all that because I'm usually a bit more, well, diplomatic.

I came to WP to get a handle on how I can be a better partner to my aspie husband and also to really get some good understanding of AS from those who live with it -- both NTs and aspies. I actually have less hope for my marriage now than I did before signing up. I'm really discouraged by all the hate. I really hope the WP staff decide to abolish hate speech outright. It would make everyone's time here so much better I think.

Be well
Feyhera

Very nicely said. I hear you. I'm hurt right now, and angry, but I know you're right, in the grand scope of things. But, I wonder... did those white civil rights workers also, once in awhile, bring it to people's attention that they were, themselves, unwittingly discriminating? I bet it happened once in awhile. I hope it happened. And I'm sure, the decent folks who could hear how hurtful it was worked on controlling their urge to generalize from then on. It would really be the only right thing to do, once it was brought to people's attention. And would that have been too much to ask that people not use hate speech? Just to make some effort not to even? Because trying and failing is a setback, while not trying and failing is true failure.