Is anyone with Aspergers super ugly like I am??

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As others have said, I was expecting someone very unattractive when I clicked on the picture, but you're not like that at all! If it makes you feel any better, I'm never called "cute" or "good-looking" by anyone but same-sex friends and family members (I suspect that they're trying to be nice/bolster my self-esteem), and I was once named on a list of "Ugliest Members" on a different forum I used to frequent before I discovered this website.

You look like a normal person to me, not ugly at all, and trust me I wouldn't lie about that.

Sure, you're no Brad Pit, but who is anyway.

Brad Pitt.

Do you really feel like killing yourself because you think you are ugly? or was it just a figure of speech?

Your post brings me back to this song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtvjy3EiVCM

I have body dysmorphic disorder (which I may make a thread about) concerning my hair, how the Op feels about his average looks is how I am with myself, particularly my hair ,it's rather horrible, perhaps the OP has the same disorder.

That video brought back a memory of kindergarten for me. I wrote it out in a poetic sort of way a while ago. I'll share part of it with you.

~

The thing I remember most of all was the light. The trapezium, hexagonal, pentagonal shafts of sunlight falling between the rich fermenting green of the vast brooding trees above me.
As a child, my tiny footsteps would have gone almost unnoticed in that living, majestic place. I barely remember the shades and textures of the dirt beneath my feet due to the overwhelmingly lush textures of greenery and sunlight above me. It was some time before my vision blurred and refocussed and I saw the other children playing in two clearly divisive groups, boys and girls, on opposite ends of the playground.
The girls played with alien-like long limbed barbie dolls, dipping them in and out of a shallow, water-filled clam shell. Something about the pale limbs of the dolls, the breaking and flowing of the water, appealed to me immensely, so I gathered up my courage and approached the other girls.
They didn’t seem to be facing me, or paying any attention to me at all. I stood for quite a while, expectantly, but they went on with their chatter and their game as though I didn’t exist. I had a vague feeling of unease and wrongness – but I spoke up anyway.
“Can I play?”
“No.”
With that, they went back to their game. So abruptly and decisively dismissed, I wasn’t sure what to do. I dithered at the fringes of their group, and tried again.
“Can I play?”
“No. Go away.”
Again, it was like I didn’t exist. They spoke and held their dolls and I was so clearly outside their circle, their vision, and their consciousness it was like there was an indestructible glass wall between us.

~

Thanks for sharing that video with me.

Thank you for sharing that.

I never really wanted to play with the other kids, I was content to pace every lunchtime, I remember one faithful day when I was perhaps 7 and I asked a group - just this once - if I could join in, they gladly said yes, not really knowing me, I was an unknown quantity, I had fun, but a few years later I was no longer welcome, I think it was because I was bad at understanding bounderies, for the fun of it I would go between two boys and press both hands on their shoulders between them and use them as leverage to hop up high.

But I remember being picked last for football teams the most, they picked the class spaz over me, I think that was the worst, because it was a silent thing between the whole class: either they didn't think I was better then anyone else or they didn't care enough to protest.

I expected you to be hideous also. You AREN'T! There are a few standards of ugliness that aren't subjective, and they say you aren't ugly. Other common ones say you aren't. Frankly, I would classify you as plain, but that DOESN'T mean ugly. And I am a straight male, so I don't know what a woman would consider handsome. I once knew this woman that I considered pretty. I really liked her. I saw a man she considered to be VERY handsome! She was SMITTEN with him! I was at a loss to see how she could like him more than me. But I would classify myself AND that guy as plain.

Another woman that I knew, that I ACTUALLY started to approach and could see as my wife ended up being a REAL tease. She WAS VERY pretty. She got FOUR boyfriends before I really made a move. ONE even got engaged with her. She ended up marrying another. ALL were what I would call plain. BUT, as I said, I am just not made to go past that point with men. BTW she DID stay with that guy a while. I haven't kept in touch, so I don't know how things ended up.

The first time I was properly accepted into a group was Grade 8 (age 14). Grade 7 I was sort of "in a group" but they tried to get rid of me/shake me off at lunch times, so I guess I wasn't really. In kindergarten onwards until high school I was actively tormented, so I at first went off by myself because people didn't want me, but then I went off by myself and tried to avoid other children for self protection.

To the OP: when you are at school your perception of yourself becomes distorted because of the way other people treat you. You have to learn to let go of that false negative self image. You aren't ugly, and you need to learn to believe that you aren't. It can take a long time.

You are not ugly. You are completely average looking in this picture. A good looking guy.

You have to stop this somehow.

What is scary for people is desperate, low self esteem.

People just don't want to be around it. NT's read it well.

Find a trusted friend, a counselor, do some reading on visualizations and get over your low self-esteem in this department.

It's important for your social life.

Confidence, no matter WHAT you look like is really really really attractive to people. Not arrogance mind you, but confidence.

Throw on some trendy fashion and you're on your way to scoring with the girls.

Last edited by tenzinsmom on 08 May 2011, 8:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yes and I do not care

You look OK 7.5/10

I am a straight male and yeah i was expecting something very frightening before i saw the picture. Your not ugly but i don't think the face your pulling in the photo is doing you any favours. if you go around with that look on your face no wonder people are afraid of you. Try smiling more and you will become better looking that i can assure you. I think just judging by the photo you are 'average' looking but i think if you maybe had a haircut, cracked a smile and if you want too maybe lose the glasses? Go to the gym as well and build muscle. Follow my advice and you will probably become good looking.

If you wanna improve your skin here is some advice
get plenty of sleep
drink enough water
moisturise with cream sutable for your skin type
eat a diet that is good for skin
exercise

Plain is kinda synonamous with ugly if you look up the defenition but the OP is not ugly.

Last edited by Jamesy on 08 May 2011, 9:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I think he she is kinda cute I gues it gives off a happy / fun vibe which makes it kinda hot .

Or am I mistaken ?

Someone's been having a little too much phun with photoshop...

And maybe a little too much tequila!

I think you're hot and beautiful

Lucky I didn't see this picture last thing at night - it f*****g scares me