They think I'm gay.

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i know some people who believe if you aren't throwing yourself in the way of traditional sexual pursuits or hedonistically seeking out romantic affairs -- you must be gay; you must be closeted and gay; and above all else, you must be persecuted for assimilative treason.

i've had people assume i was gay simply because i'm 30 i've never been in a real relationship. the assumption is that because i have no gross disfigurements of the physical kind, i should be bagging men with the same frequency as any other woman (and since i'm not, it must be due to undisclosed homosexuality). the truth is probably less interesting than the reality: while heterosexual, i'm just not wired for romantic connection because i'm not much wired for connection in general. it's not that i don't care about others or empathize... i'd just rather spend my time in the lab, reading or doing math than confusing my mind with the complexity and caprices of relationships.

i think some people are so socially and romantically invested they have a hard time fathoming a position like that so they explain things using frameworks that are easier to accept. i think its honestly easier for certain extroverted romanto-philes to tell themselves you're probably gay - than to accept that you may not necessarily care about the same sorts of things they care about, in the same way.

Last edited by shortcircuit3 on 19 Jul 2013, 10:40 am, edited 1 time in total.

Me too. Problem is, I can't exactly say I'm straight or bi either. I'm asexual and don't want to explain that to people.

I don't think this type of reaction from Nt men is all that uncommon. hanyo's had it too (see previous page):



I think it's the ego. That is the only way they can absorb the fact that you aren't interested, it's comforting to them because it's then not about them not being fanciable, it's because you're a dyke.

People in the past have thought that I was a lesbian, because I've never had sex, I've never dated and I've never been really interested in dating and I've never had a relationship.

Ahw well. I'm neither really interested in dating another girl, so how could I be a lesbian? People are weird when they try to put a label on my sexuality. I don't need a label for or a way to call my sexuality, thank you. I still don't know what my sexuality is, and I don't feel it's something I need to know to live my life.

Seconded!

I know for me I was what is known as "Metrosexual". Someone who is kinda thin, intelligent, sophisticated on trends and city life. Hangs around with other intelligent people, polite mannerisms, quiet type etc. Some regular NT guys are big, tatted, loud drunks who have to watch or talk about the Latest Sexual Score, Football, Monster trucks, Keg parties or the latest Beer In-fuzed Ass Kicking at the local party every 5 minutes!! They view us as "Weak Little Pansies" who don't fit in and MUST be gay!!

I guess this is why I am a loner for the most part since I was a child. I have hardly anything in common with a lot of guys. They talk about stuff I have no interest in. They jump to conclusions such as this to easily and a lot of them do not think. It is very frustrating. I like to talk about philosophy and philosophize. I love computer programming and things like the min/max algorithm. In fact, I created a Tic Tac Toe game with an Artificial Intelligence player once. I love to imagine different types of technologies that could up depending on what type civilization we're on the Kardashev scale. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kardashev_scale In fact, I had this crazy idea that I thought would work which in theory would've sped up an anti-virus scanner's scan rate to scan within minutes instead of hours. It was based upon a faulty assumption.




Actually, that makes sense. A lot of guys around my area have this tendency to prop themselves up more than they really are. Why they do this is beyond me. Here is the thing with guys. When they're young, especially with teenagers, there are two organs they're thinking with. They're thinking either with their brain or their penis. They can't think with both at once.

They do this as a form of male bonding as well or if there are other females they're trying to woo them.

Hasn't happened a lot for me. Only a few times I'm aware of, though I think it's more than I know about. (Then again, that might just be the social anxiety.) In my case, it's probably due to my never having a girlfriend, dating, "hanging out" (if you know what I mean) with girls, and having very few female friends. (Not what I planned, just happend that way.) Also, I feel like people view me as somewhat eccentric, and this might contribute to some thinking that I'm gay. I think those are really the only reasons. People close to me know that I'm completely straight.

Shortcircuit is dead on, if you are not following the normal traditions, then you are automatically deemed (weird, gay). For me, it is women that tell me I am gay, since I work with so many, and I pay them no attention, the result is that I am gay. I guess the excuses I give the most of them doesn't really make sense to them. I am not wired to be tied down in a relationship, and don't think I ever will be.

someone asked my sister if my brother (they are NT's) was gay. This was because my brother is 30 and single.


Seems people think you are gay if u don't do what they think you should.

My ex-wife of 10 years would totally disagree with that statement.