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Funny 'literal' moments

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Edna3362
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04 Feb 2015, 6:00 am

Kiriae wrote:
On internet chat:

Someone: - How is your day going?
Me: - Just like any other day. Nothing special happened today so far.
(Correct answer: "Fine, how about yours?")

Someone: - What are you currently doing?
Me: - I'm chatting with you.
(Correct answer: "I am studying IT")


I would say "I'm alive and breathing, and hungry/sitting/typing/watching/reading/so on.." instead. :lol:


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ASPartOfMe
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13 May 2015, 1:47 pm

This not about me but a call to a radio contest to win tickets to the "Laid Back Music Festival". The contestants needed to explain the laid back day they were experiencing. A man calls up and says that at 4:30 AM he went to the gym and rode a Recumbent bicycle know for placing riders "in a laid-back reclining position". Then he went home and at 5:30 AM and worked on his checkbook.


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KaylamiYarne
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13 May 2015, 1:57 pm

When I was seven, my parents left me and my brother at their friends' house to watch over us while they went for a night out.
The lady took me to a store and told me I could buy whatever I want, so I picked out a milky way candy bar.
When we got back to her house, her husband saw the candy bar and said "Hot dogs, my favorite!" ("hot dogs" is a statement of jubilation)
I was confused, and asked him "This is hot dogs?", holding out the candy bar :lol:



Kiriae
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13 May 2015, 2:03 pm

A classmate whispers to her friend,while copying a chart from the board:
- I wish I brought more pen colors.
Teacher says out loud:
- Tomorrow I want everyone to bring color pencils.
Me:
- What colors of pencils? Because I don't think I have any of them. I haven't use color pencils since elementary school. I am wondering if I can bring my highlighters instead...
Teacher:
- I was kidding...



KaylamiYarne
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13 May 2015, 2:17 pm

Kiriae wrote:
A classmate whispers to her friend,while copying a chart from the board:
- I wish I brought more pen colors.
Teacher says out loud:
- Tomorrow I want everyone to bring color pencils.
Me:
- What colors of pencils? Because I don't think I have any of them. I haven't use color pencils since elementary school. I am wondering if I can bring my highlighters instead...
Teacher:
- I was kidding...


How was the teacher kidding? Even after reading that the teacher was kidding, I don't understand the joke :? I would've responded the exact same way you did lol



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13 May 2015, 2:22 pm

I was at Goodwill with my mother the other week and she asked me "Where do we go?" and I said "After these people here, just follow them." My mom asked again, "where are we going after we leave this store?" and I realized what she meant.


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Kiriae
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13 May 2015, 2:35 pm

KaylamiYarne wrote:
Kiriae wrote:
A classmate whispers to her friend,while copying a chart from the board:
- I wish I brought more pen colors.
Teacher says out loud:
- Tomorrow I want everyone to bring color pencils.
Me:
- What colors of pencils? Because I don't think I have any of them. I haven't use color pencils since elementary school. I am wondering if I can bring my highlighters instead...
Teacher:
- I was kidding...


How was the teacher kidding? Even after reading that the teacher was kidding, I don't understand the joke :? I would've responded the exact same way you did lol

He heard the girl saying she needs more colors to copy his chart so he suggested we should bring color pencils so noone complains anymore. Apparently he didn't mean it, it was only his reaction to what my classmate said. A sarcasm.
There was nothing requiring color pencils on the next day.



JT_B_Goode
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13 May 2015, 3:59 pm

Had this conversation in the cafeteria at work.

Cook: "Have you ever had a tall glass of chocolate milk?"
Me: "Uhh... you mean here?"
The cook and two women beside me laughed.
Cook: "Sure! Anywhere!"
Me: "I mean... I've had plenty of chocolate milk.
More laughing.

Took me another several seconds to realize from the context of his conversation with the women that he was asking if I'd ever had sex with a black woman.



KaylamiYarne
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13 May 2015, 4:03 pm

JT_B_Goode wrote:
Had this conversation in the cafeteria at work.

Cook: "Have you ever had a tall glass of chocolate milk?"
Me: "Uhh... you mean here?"
The cook and two women beside me laughed.
Cook: "Sure! Anywhere!"
Me: "I mean... I've had plenty of chocolate milk.
More laughing.

Took me another several seconds to realize from the context of his conversation with the women that he was asking if I'd ever had sex with a black woman.


Never heard of that phrase lol, I would be as confused as **** 8O



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13 May 2015, 6:05 pm

I saw a headline on MSN this morning that said, "Woman Stabbed 36 Times to Marry Rescuer." I read it for a minute wondering why she had to be stabbed 36 times to marry this guy, and then realized what they meant.