What are some inappropriate things that you have said?

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there are many times when people have become upset at what i have said.

i was not to blame, and the situations i will exemplify are not funny, but they were seen as seriously cold hearted and ill thought out.

this is the worst thing i ever said:
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1. an old man who was in a tavern where i was dining (when i was in my early 20's) seemed to be drunk, and he chose me to come over to and talk to, and he asked if he could sit at my table. i told him i did not mind, and he started to "befriend" me. i did not judge his slurring words, and i was prepared to give him some of my attention. eventually, he pulled a picture out of his wallet and he showed me the picture.

the picture was of a young good looking man wearing sunglasses who was sitting in a fighter jet on the tarmac with his canopy open and he was gesticulating a thumbs up gesture, and he looked like that fellow on the old show "chips" (eric estrada (who i never liked (and that is why i remember his name))).

i thought "what a conceited jerk" about the man in the picture, and i wondered whether the old man was a homosexual.

anyway, the old man said "you know....he was shot down and killed straight after this picture was taken".
i said "no wonder. if he had been more focused on his mission and less on the photo shoot, he probably would have survived. what a waste of a jet. they cost about 70 million i think."

then the man seemed to collapse in a mild way (he became groggy and confused), and i complained to the bar staff. they knew him, and after they worked out what had happened, they told me that the photo was of his son, and his son was shot down during an air battle, and not while sitting and posing.

the picture was taken about 20 minutes before he was killed and not seconds before he was killed.

i learned many lessons that night. i never again went off "half cocked" after that. i was very sorry.
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2. my girlfriend's father had a friend who knew an eminent policeman who was shot dead in the line of duty. he had a state funeral. her father told me that the policeman was very well known and admired by everyone.

then the news came on, and her father told us all to shut up while the newsreader was describing the situation.

the news reader said "he was admired and loved by both his colleagues and the community in which he served".

i said " i thought he would have had more than 2 colleagues. how did he become famous with only 2 colleagues?"

her father said "tammy!! !....tell him to get out of here now" (about me).
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3. another time when i was at tammy's house (i tried hard to avoid going there), there was a situation where a 21 year old girl died because her brain swelled after drinking too much water due to excessive thirst after imbibing ecstasy. her brain stem popped as it tried to swell into her spinal column. tammy's brother knew this girl, and the whole family thought it was a tragedy (which it was).

i saw it on the news the day before i was at tammy's. tammy's family had the TV on during dinner, and the news repeated the story the next night, but i did not know it was about the same girl, and i said "wow, they are dropping like flies." because i thought there must be a bad batch of ecstasy, and again i was told to go home.
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4. i worked for a few years where i had to regularly go to a company in wetherill park.
i befriended the young man in the car park. he was responsible for the maintenance on the trucks that that company had.

when i got out of my car, he always greeted me, and we usually talked for 15-20 minutes about things, and i really liked him. his name was "sam".

one day, i parked my car, and i saw him, and he had a man beside him who he was kissing. i was surprised to an extreme degree.

he said "this is my boyfriend.." whoever (i forget his name), and i said " i am sorry, i did not know you were gay".

then i found out that "sam" was a girl. i always thought he was a male, but he was actually a girl.

i should have known because he had a high pitched voice and looked like a girl when i thought about it.

she was very upset that i thought she was a male for the whole time of our friendship.

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it is better i keep to myself, and i do these days.

Before I started dating my husband he asked if I was going to the pub and I said no. As I drove away I suddenly realised the subtext was that he wanted to see me and so did go

I was out having a drink with a guy I hadn't seen in years, and as I was monologuing about something, he leaned over and kissed me. And I said, am I talking too much?

I was looking for a dress with my mom for a high school dance, and the one that I'd tried on didn't look good. I said "I'll put this back on the HOOKER!". I had noticed a girl in a slu*ty dress right before I would've said "hanger" and accidentally called her a slut Everyone in that room heard me, and everyone agreed with me. She was there with her dad and they were both embarrassed

my nephews funeral was a debacle.

he was 32 ( i was only 2 years older than him), and he died of some septic disease which i never was told the details of.

i was invited to go to the funeral.
at the funeral, there were very many things that went wrong for me.

1. when everyone arrived (brothers in law and sisters and his friends etc), they were all hugging each other, and i decided i would hide in the toilet until the service started. the husband of my sister who's son died came and rapped on the door of the cubicle and told me to make an effort to bond, and he told me i should go outside and help with the grieving process.

i said that i thought they were grieving quite well without my input, and he said in a sterner voice "you better come out now", so i did.

when i got outside to the yard around the church, everyone was talking with tears in their eyes, and there was a hugging session still going on.

my sister (who was the mother of my nephew) looked at me eventually, and she ran toward me and offered her arms for me to fall into, and i looked at her arms and i said "err..no thanks. i'll be ok".
i thought that she was offering me some kind of succour because she thought i was distressed, but i was not that distressed, so i thought i was relieving her of the chore of addressing me.

later i learned that she was looking for comfort from me, and it was perceived that i rejected her, and the whole incident was seen in a negative light.

anyway, when we went into the chapel for the service, there was a woman who was playing an organ, and she seemed full of herself, and she seemed like she was relishing playing for the crowd who she imagined was appreciating her talent as an organ player.

as she was coming to the end of her song, the priest stepped toward the microphone, and he waited for her to finish, and when she finished the song, he drew breath to start his sermon, but she was oblivious to that fact, and she began playing the song again from the beginning, and the priest walked over to her in as reverend a way as he could, and he quietly said to her "thanks joan", and she stopped playing.

at that point i sniggered and the whole crowd heard it. i thought " i better not start laughing or all hell will break loose", and so i decided to go outside to calm down and collect myself. my brother in law came out and said in a frustrated voice "mark! of all days please collect yourself and try to join in with the rest of us".

so i went back in, and the sermon was in progress. it was boring. i was looking at the carpet on the floor of the chapel, and i noticed a strip of carpet that had been laid back to front, and the overall pattern was disrupted by this strip of carpet, and my mind imagined a kind of comedic scenario of idiots laying the carpet, and not getting it right, and i again snorted because i was trying to suppress more mirth that was swelling in me. i managed to look away, and i did not go outside during that phase, but nevertheless my behaviour was noted by many people.


after the sermon was over, we all had to stand around on the driveway of the chapel for a while, and nothing seemed to be happening, and my brother in law had exhausted his words with other people, so he wandered over to where i was standing.

i thought i could talk about other things at that point since the funeral was over, so i pointed out some mail boxes in a brick wall, and i said "obviously the developers ran out of money", and he asked why, and i said "because it looks like there are about 30 mail boxes there, but there is no block of flats that they belong to, so i guess they built the front fence and then ran out of money".

well, i was told that they were not mailboxes. they were spots in the wall for urns containing ashes of cremated people, and i suddenly realized that no one could get a development application for a block of units that close to the chapel, but when i commented on that it further compounded the matter as far as he was concerned.

i decided to go home before the wake, because i was not hungry, and even that gave them the s**ts.

whatever.

When I was eight, my mom and a few of her friends were out by the pool one day. One of my mom's friends was exceptionally busty, and wearing a slightly-tight swimsuit, and I couldn't help staring. Finally, someone asked me what was wrong with me. I said...

"Her boobies look like someone's butt!"

Of course, I used my "Outdoor voice"...

ok, I have nothing against gay people, that must be made clear first, but I was about 11 years old, just started my new secondary school, and my form group had to go to P.E [physical education''. I had no friends, and had no real idea of where to go or do. I followed the rest of my year into the changing rooms, and watched as everyone started to get changed into their sports kit. Was I supposed to do this? Nobody had told me if I should! So, I asked a boy near me.
''Do we all just get changed now then?''
He looked at me with a '' what the F'' look, and replied.
''Are you gay? Stop looking at me!''
Now, being an avid reader of enid blyton '' childrens author from the 1950's'' I believed the word ''gay'' to mean happy, joyful. So, I replied.
''No I'm not gay at the minute, but I might be once we get going''.
I meant it as in, I wasn't very happy at that time as I was nervous, but I thought once we started the lesson and began running around, I might find it easier and would become happier, or ''gayer''. His reaction to my reply was to drop his bag, run into the other changing room, and return with three bullying types who promptly decided to bully me, call me a little fa***t and tip all my things out of my bag. Perhaps it's not a FUNNY story to report, but it certainly shows my lack of understanding, and maybe will make some of you giggle at my ignorance.

I am not sure if this is normal for a seven year old but I do know most of them should know better by then because even six year olds know it's not okay to say this. That is what my shrink said anyway when i was in high school because he said they know it would hurt someone's feelings.


I was seven years old and my mom was taking down Christmas lights or putting up the flag, I don't remember which. I see our neighbor walking to the mail box and I notice for the first time she is fat because I had learned what fat meant so I pointed to my mother "Mom, look how fat she is." Mom doesn't answer so I keep on saying it thinking she doesn't hear me. Even the neighbor said nothing and instead mom and her start doing chit chat about something and then mom turns to me and tells m to go in the house and sit on the bedroom stairs. I was so confused.

A while ago I was with some "friends" (they´re not my friends anymore) and I said: "Ugliness offends me", referring to another classmate, and I didn´t realice it was inappropiate until I thought about it just a couple of seconds later, when they didn´t take it very well. It was supposed to be a joke...

Another time I was talking to a "friend" (I haven´t seen him in years) by the phone. He used to visit me every weekend and I was feeling very tired, so I told him "do you think you can come here later, because I´´m a little tired of you right now"

He never called me again.

This just happened this week:

Woman coworker: "I have some news."
Me and other coworkers: "...yeah?"
Her: "Matt (her husband) and I bought a house."
Me: "Oh, I thought you were going to say you were pregnant."

I did not in any way mean that she looked fat or anything! Just that that's what I was expecting to hear after she announced having news about her and her husband. Yikes.

Like many of you Aspies, I have unintentionally said things that were considered to be inappropriate, impolite and or hurtful to other people numerous times.

For instance, back in 8th grade I was in a special-education English class with less than 10 kids. In the class, there was a girl that was like the size of the WWE's Big Show and said that she wanted to be a basketball player. I responded to her by saying "If you want to be a basketball player, you're gonna have to lose all that weight now". My teacher was shocked and upset.

Also, an older cousin of mine unexpectedly stopped at my house to visit me and the family. When I kissed her on the cheek, I went like this "OOOOOHHH, you must be very sweaty". She told me "Yes, I am sweaty. I was jogging around town". I could feel real sweat on her cheeks. After my cousin left the house, my mom told me that what I said to her was very impolite. My mom also had to apologize to her for both my behavior and my condition by phone during the night.

Four years old, at drugstore.

Mom? What's a condom??

Mom.. Look Jamie, do you want candy??

Me... Whats a condom???

Mom drags me out the door, I am yelling condom at the top of my lungs.


Yeesh, pretty embarrasing

Some of the posts in this thread make me sad . Just some sad stories.

I remember being seven years old and this girl in my home room class had this scab on her face. I say to her one day it's ugly and she goes "I'm telling."

I remember when I was eight, we were all in the library and one of the librarians who is going to read to us, I say to her she is fat and she says back "Yeah I ate too much."

I remember when I was 10 and 11, we took this family trip in the summer. I was 11 and we were in Texas and we were at a restaurant. I noticed people are talking weird and then this waitress comes and starts to ask us if what we like to drink. I say to my parents. "All these people are talking funny" and the waitress laughs and mom explains to me it's called an accent and that is how people talk down there.

And I don't know if this was inappropriate, I was 14 and we go see The World is Not Enough. We are at the part where James Bond is in bed with Elektra and I see he has a very hairy chest. I say to my mother in a loud whisper "Mom is that real chest hair?" The two teens sitting next to us laugh and mom tells me "yes Beth it is. "I then say to her "but how do you know it's not fake hair just like in Austin Powers?" More laughter came from around us. I bet they were all thinking how stupid I must be or must be mentally challenged.

I remember another time when I was fourteen, I was eating lunch in the lunch room and I decide I wanted to share a joke with my school mates. They said they would like to hear it so I start telling them. "Here is an outhouse, right in the middle of the forest" the girls start to cut me off saying "no not while we are eating" just as I remembered that talking about poop and pee is a no no during meal time. I wasn't thinking.

I remember that Easter, mom and I were at one of the lady's house from her beta group. We were all peeling tape off the eggs for the Easter Egg hunt. I decided to start telling blonde jokes because blonde jokes were my favorite then and one of my obsessions. Mom tells me "Beth look around you" I look and I wasn't sure what I was supposed to be looking at until mom told me to look at all the ladies hair. I look at their hair to find they were all blonde. I keep telling blonde jokes and mom tells me "Beth, what color is everyones hair?" I see they all have blonde hair except for my mother and I. Mom tells me I am telling blonde jokes and all of these women have blonde hair so they might get offended. One of them starts telling me a bunch if blonde jokes. I found out later she only did that to shut me up. It sure worked because I got what I liked.


And this was just earlier this year:


Mom, my aunt, my son, and I were at IKEA and we were looking in the kitchen section. I counter tops were real low and I mention they are good for midgets. Mom laughs and goes "oh Beth" and I say 'What did I do?" and she goes "Oh it's the way you said it." I didn't know what she was talking about and then later I remembered Midget is an insult now. Darn political correctness. Here is the funny thing, Mom was the one who taught me that word when I was eight. I then asked her what it was and she told me someone who is very short.

When I was little I was with my Mum in a shopping centre. She used the cash machine to withdraw some money and I saw her punch in her PIN number. Proudly, I told her that I knew her PIN. She became very flustered and told me that I must never tell it to anybody and I had to try to forget it. Of course, that only made it so that her PIN was going round and round in my head for the rest of the day. A little later on I was kind of restless and frustrated because she was pulling me away from something I wanted to look at. Instead of just plain screaming, I yelled her PIN number - not because I wanted other people to know it, but because I had been thinking about it all day and it was right there at the front of my brain and just slipped out.