The worst thing a bully has done to you
When I was in school there wasn't any bullying awareness like there is now. People told you to just ignore it or that you'd have to learn to deal with it yourself. They'd tell you stuff like you need to toughen up or be less sensitive and that you'll need to learn to deal with people like that to manage when you get out of school. That was pre Columbine and I think incidents like that are what started forcing schools to do more about bullying.
Why would the parents send their kid back? In the US it's the law that you have to go to school until you are 16. I ended up skipping so much that I got sent away twice. Back when I was younger homeschooling wasn't as common and as far as my mother and I knew wasn't an option. No one drove in my house so I don't even know if my mother could have put me in a new school and I think I probably would have been bullied wherever I went.
Actually starting with sixth grade I was put in a different school each year and I was still bullied for a while with it slowly decreasing as I got older.
Last edited by hanyo on 28 Jul 2012, 3:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Another time I was doing my work and a lot of the students in the class started rolling paper with tape as many times as possible in a rock shape and all of them threw it at me.
I have been knocked into lockers. I have been punched, kicked. Everyday i would come home with bruises all over my body. The teachers were always on the bullies side because they claimed that I made myself a target by being different. Sometimes the teachers themselves would call me, "stupid, dumb, incapable of doing anything useful, and other horrible things." The students also called me names every single day I was there. Believe it or not, I was suspended more times than the bullies because I made myself a target and reacted to when the bullies were making fun of me or beating on me. Huh???? In fact I got out of the school and got put in a private school because of what happened. The private school at first was decent, in fact I had a great teacher there. But the next year there I had bad luck again with bullies because they let more dangerous kids in there. In fact one of them threatened to KILL me and he has actually done dangerous things before and did things like stab a teacher with scissors. This kid also threw desks down the flight of stairs there. And he threatened to kill me. Luckily once again I got out of that school before anything happened. So, yeah I have been bullied in most schools except college.
Thank God I'm done with school. College seems more calm but of course there are bullies everywhere but I'm glad to have left hell with all those twelve years of school. YES, teachers should know better not to bully. If you fight back, you get in trouble too. I remember there was this teacher in third grade who was disgusted of me and claimed that it was my fault that everyone got sick (I used to get sick a lot and suffered from scarlet fever)
A few more random thoughts to add to this discussion....
How do you think I felt? I was 6'4" in Junior High but had horrendous posture due to the massive growth spurt. Half the reason nobody took me seriously because of this. Before the bullying got out of hand, I simply had enough intelligence to understand what everyone over the age of 22 knows: fighting is not fun and can cause permanent injury. If I had to flip out and break the bully's bones, none of this likely would have ever happened but I believed the whole fairy tale about the good guys always coming out on top.
It was the ostracism that hurt. The weapon of choice for female bullies, of course. As someone wrote " It was one thing to walk-away from people or situations, it was something else to be EXCLUDED from them." It REALLY hurt.
Too true. The incident that almost pushed me over the edge was not physical at all: a girl who was the ugliest beach whale you will ever see (to put it mildly) got up in front of the class and offered $40 if I would promise never to sit with or go near her again. At that point literally the entire class (except one quiet girl) was against me and I was treated like I had the plague from that point on until my mother yanked me out of school. I learned how people who are willing to stand up for what's right are few and far between.
Absolutely, but in Canada kids can pretty much do anything before the age of 18 without consequence.The police know it's a waste of time to prosecute them and pretty much told my parents there was nothing they could do about the beatings, harassment,etc.. Funny how teachers used to always say "If you think THIS is bad, wait until you are in the real world". Try walking up to a random person and punching them in the face. Do you think everyone will just say to your victim "quit your whining, it's only a broken nose!" and pretend like the victim deserved it for walking too close? I don't think so! I was actually shocked to learn assault was illegal because every time I reported it I was told it's a part of growing up and to learn to fight back instead of tattling.
One of the main problems is that if you as much as throw your hand up in defense you are considered just as guilty as those who attacked you. Of course, while the punishment is the same to an honours students it's much worse than to a 'inmate' who's only there because he's forced to be. Same way how a criminal record will permanently end some careers (like nursing, international business and teaching) but others it will have zero effect (like drug dealers).
While I was away from campsite for a class, two kids a year younger than me covered my sleeping materials and clothing in human excrement, which they fished from the latrine. Smeared it all over everything.
Another kid in my troop took pity on the situation, and made room in his camp area for me. He was really a kind person, actually, by nature. I like to think we'd have been better friends had I not been so disoriented by what the bullies had done.
The world is a strange place - I learned that the kind individual died of brain cancer in 2010 only 25 years old. ... Those who did the bullying are still around.
You know, I hate that it's always the kindest people in the world that has to experience pain more than those who are ignorant and wasting their time bullying innocent people.
Who the hell created this world???
I always complained about my school-years "dangerous psycho-kid" label and social ostracism - and I have to stop it now
Ok, many times I had to fight to defend myself (you really don't want to know), but at least no one tried to bully me more than once...
so then no one tried to humiliate me
(cause local bullies always searched for" the weakest in herd" to torment this person - they was too chicken-hearted to pick someone who could fight back)
Yeah, bullies just want attention and look for the weakest guy to pick on. They run away like chickens if they see the tough side of you. I wish I could have fought back.
I'm appalled. I just can't understand how a mother can send her kid to school the next day after his nose was broken by another child and she can't even mention it to the teacher / headmaster... This is, as someone mentioned above, very different from the real world!
My colleague's child bit another child's nose in the first year of elementary school (a couple years ago) and she had to spend the day in conversations with the parents of the other child, the teacher, the headmaster, and try to ensure it wouldn't reach serious dimensions. The child didn't even draw blood, so after a lot of talks and having the children recount the story several times, each from their own point of view, and talking to the children a lot, the issue was dropped. Had the child drawn a little bit of blood, it could've ended in Court.
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There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats - Albert Schweitzer
well.. cut my head open tree time..
once I was trodden on with football boots
most of it was verbal abuse intended to enrage me which it did..not something they enjoyed but they were gluttons for punishment for some reason.
though things were stole for me with the same intention and effect as above.
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existence is your only oblitgation
Quietly fighting for the greater good.
Where do I start? Sexual harrassment from a boss (he actually grabbed my breasts twice and made frequent jokes and comments to others about my large breasts); was stabbed in the arm by a girl in junior high with a ball point pen; had an icy snowball mashed into my face at age 6 by an 11 yr old boy; was punched in the stomach at age 10 by a 7 yr old boy; was pushed off my bed at age 13 by another 13 yr old girl; tons of others. And today at age 50, I take personal aggression and disrespect at work from a 33 yr old man who acts and looks like a 13 yr old junior high school kid due to his own insecurities. I hardly even stick up for myself and when I do, I come off wimpy and pathetic.
iheartmegahitt
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I had a bully threaten to bring a gun in and kill me. =.= Yeah, I'm serious. It scared me so bad that I thought he was going to come after me with a gun pointed at me and just shoot me. Turns out the kid was lying and the principal didn't do s**t about it. The kid didn't even HAVE a gun.
My mom was pissed. Can't say I blame her when her child was scared s**tless and afraid to sleep. I think I was only in like...fifth grade at the time? I was still young and plus, when you're a ten year old girl in the body of a seven year old, things like that are pretty serious s**t.
As for cyberbullying, I had a whole forum turn against me after they found out i had autism. It was by accident. I even had one person who was gay treat me like crap not long after he started working with autistic children. The guy used to be my best friend. He called Autism a disease and it made me so mad. =.=
I could name a lot of things. Most of my bad experiences were because people thought that if I had autism I was just asking for attention. I tell them because if something comes up when I'm in shutdown mode and don't want to talk, not to think I'm being a jerk or that I'm ignoring them.
I've even been assualted before in middle school when a kid slapped my face. I've been made fun of because I have a tooth missing. I've even been called names and been picked last for teams...you name it. I was even kicked off a baseball team at my school in elementary because of how bad I was. I've even had teachers look down on my like I was some kind of idiot.
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Diagnosed with an autistic disorder (Not AS but mild to moderate classic Autism), ADHD, Learning Disability, intellectual disability and severe anxiety (part of the autism); iPad user; written expressionist; emotionally-sensitive
one day my friend told me that people talk behind my back because of "that strange thing she does with her hands" (my stims) "and she always looks miserable" (emotionless face) and stuff like that. I can tell that some people look down on me.
once I was at camp. We hung our wet bathing suits up on a string between 2 trees to dry. The counselor specifically said "do not put them to close to the tree or ants will get all over them". The next day, I found that my bathing suit was moved from the middle to right next to the tree and it was covered in fire ants,and all the other girls laughed at me.
I have had my pants pulled down a few times, once someone slapped my thigh so hard that my thigh was purple and blue for 3 days in the shape of a hand print. I have been excluded,ignored, lied about (to get me in trouble), talked about behind my back,and people have spread rumors about me.
I hate wearing shoes, so one day we had a substitute and I walked around all day with out shoes on. The class bully stole my shoes and put them on the roof of the school,then every one laughed as I tried to get them.
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I am a 14 year old girl.
I have synesthesia.
aspie quiz results: 172/200
I am suspected to have aspergers, but I'm not diagnosed.
My old best friend making up lies about me in 5th grade and kids believing her. Her telling these new kids in my neighborhood I am ret*d and she used to make other kids not play with me or she beat them up. Her threatening to rip the heads off my Barbie dolls if I don't do as she says. Her and her cousin telling me to go hide in my bedroom closet, I did and they ran home. Also when I was eight, she and her cousin told me if anyone makes fun of me, show them my middle finger. I believed them and did it all the time until mom told me not to do it anymore and what the middle finger meant.
In 6th grade, these kids telling me about a singer named Jack Off and I believed them. one day I looked it up online and was told to get off the computer because it was inappropriate. I still had no clue what I did wrong and thought the singer was inappropriate to look up and didn't know why.
When I was six, there was this boy in my class and he was a chronic liar. One time he scribbled over his own math problem and told the teacher I did it. She believed him and I got in trouble. One time he told a duty lady on the playground I hit him and she believed him and I got into trouble. One time before going somewhere, I was waiting in line with the other kids and this other boy hit his arm and he said I did it and I got into trouble. I think he had ODD because he was a chronic liar and liked hurting other kids and lying about it and he threw chairs one time. I was so glad he was not in that class again the following year. but I got him into trouble the following year and the teacher thought he did it and he said it was me but she didn't believe him. I just kept on walking ignoring it. It was unintentional that I got him into trouble and I didn't want to be the one in trouble so I let him take the blame. I used to feel guilty about it and see myself as bad for a awhile but I realize now he deserved it and it was like karma and I had my revenge.
In second grade these kids from my class told me to step in this one grass area so I did and they all ran telling me it was Joshua grass. There was a rumor that he had rabies so no one wanted to touch him nor things he touched, not even me.
My own other friend turning against me in 4th grade and starting to exclude me and reject me and make fun of me. She did it in 5th grade too. She would claim she was teaching me a lesson. I still don't know what I really did wrong to make her be mean to me.
Mom got me a new coat when I was six and I only had it for about three days. These older kids in my school from special ed took my coat and did something with it. It was never found. They also tried pushing me into a mud puddle and they did but I didn't fall in and my legs got all muddy.
Also being taken advantage of.
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Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
auntblabby
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she will get her commupance when she meets her maker then. - "Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me." IOW, god is not mocked.
Wow you guys have also been through a lot. You've reminded me of other things that happened to me. I also had a teacher that HATED me when I was just in kindergarten!! I was never even her student but she used to torment me in the halls and I was afraid of her. She was really popular with the other kids...they all loved her and I couldn't figure out why. One day I had my hand slammed (accidentally) in a classroom door. After getting my hand out, I was crying of course, the nails had all come off (it was pretty gross) and I was bleeding. I went around looking for any adult and who did I find? Her. I couldn't even talk because I was crying so hard so I just showed her my hand. She yelled at me "Oh come on stop your crying, it's not that bad!" She practically physically dragged me to the nurse's office and I ended up going to the Dr. and then home. This woman gave me such a complex. If it was done today she'd be fired but this was in the 1960s and a lot of stuff was overlooked.
Someone here had their shoes thrown on the roof of the building...I had my hat and mittens thrown on the roof. My father called the girl's parents and made her father bring his own ladder to the school and go up on the roof and get them. But my father made me go too thinking that would help my self esteem but it only made it worse. The girl's father had this attitude of "here, here's your stupid kid's gloves, are ya happy now?" This only reinforced me feeling like his daughter was normal and I was some pathetic loser.
My mother once told me that the girls pick on me because I'm smart and pretty and they are jealous. I believed this for years until I realzed 'hey, there are other smart and pretty girls at school and nobody picks on them.'
iheartmegahitt
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Someone here had their shoes thrown on the roof of the building...I had my hat and mittens thrown on the roof. My father called the girl's parents and made her father bring his own ladder to the school and go up on the roof and get them. But my father made me go too thinking that would help my self esteem but it only made it worse. The girl's father had this attitude of "here, here's your stupid kid's gloves, are ya happy now?" This only reinforced me feeling like his daughter was normal and I was some pathetic loser.
My mother once told me that the girls pick on me because I'm smart and pretty and they are jealous. I believed this for years until I realzed 'hey, there are other smart and pretty girls at school and nobody picks on them.'
I had a teacher, my second grade teacher, stick me into the back of the room facing the wall. If i turned around he would make me face the wall. It was like I was being excluded from learning. I had to be quiet and pretend I wasn't in the classroom. Mind you, second grade was during the time I got diagnosed with ADHD and a learning disability. They were still running more tests on me at the time to determine why I was the way I was. At the time i was also still in speech therapy but showing improvment with communication. Since I started talking more. (I was a late talker and didn't talk until four/I had Echolalia...or whatever too around that age.) But my diagnosis didn't come until like... the eighth grade. I was in junior high and i was treated like s**t by my teachers because of my learning differences.
They thought I wasn't ready for the eighth grade so they pulled me back. I also read how a few people said they were blamed for the bullying. I was blamed too because of my aggression in Kindergarten. My mom seems to think that I picked on THEM so much that as I got older and grew out of the phase of aggression that they started taking revenge on me.
Another thing i remember, it wasn't at school but one of my best friends (she was in fourth grade or fifth and I was in the same grade as her brother. She and another girl in the same grade as my best friend were my only friends) well I was at her house because my parents were out and they said I could go to her house for a while. Her brother threw a rock really hard at the back of my head and it hurt me...to the point where i cried a bit. I remember his sister getting pissed at him and then him saying some stupid crap like, "I didn't do it." but I knew best friend was on my side.
Most of my friends were a few grades lower because where I had my whole class pick on me. But get this...I met one of my bullies on Facebook quite a while ago, right? He actually APOLOGIZED for the way he treated me in seventh grade. O_O It shocked me because I told him about how he bullied me and was just...shocked. I never spoke to him after though. I took him off Facebook because it was really awkward for me. I can't remember all my incidents with school bullies but I know the kids faces enough to cringe and not want to bring up those memories.
Mind you, it wasn't just the kids but the teachers, like i said before, ALWAYS looked down on to me like I was dumb or stupid...or too sensitive and stuff. My mom fought and fought and fought with them all the way up till my graduation from high school to have an aide with me because i struggled in school so much. It was so bad that my mom had to SCREAM at me five or six times each school morning just to get me to go. I hated it that much. It was all she could do.
I remember being in the nurse's office in high school crying and screaming to her that I wanted to come home. I mean full on meltdown mode. It was that horrible. Since I got into high school (I graduated, thank goodness), I had all my teachers take advantage of my skills and talents. They knew i was a great writer but they took advantage of it thinking I could write anything. We often had to do current events (If you don't know, current events were where you had to read an article from a newspaper and write what you read). Not only was it hard on my reading comprehension but the fact that I had little interest those kind of things. My history teacher however, let me write about something that interested me. He let me find an anime article online and said I could write about that.
BUT my computers teacher give a big NO on it since I had to current events in his class. I got a low grade for not doing them until he actually had to force me and say 'just write as much as you can on the few articles I choose for you'.
I also had to have my own binder for school. It helped me stay organized better but my computers teacher also gave that a no. See, if I had a different binder for class, it would throw me off and make it harder for me to keep everything organized. I even tried to push it with my mentor teacher but he didn't understand.
And don't get me started on the life skills program I was into during my second senior year...those were the worst days of my life! I was being treated like the mentor for the more disabled kids DURING MY FIRST YEAR. There was one incident where, I'm sure some can relate to the whole loud voice and whatever, that one of the aides was with us at the bank to cash our paychecks from the work we did for handling and giving out pizzas on a certain day.
Well, anyway, Alex (I won't use his real name. In this scenario, I'll change the names), who had down syndrome, cut me. I have a loud voice but don't realize it. Well, i told him not to cut and Haruhi (the aide) called me over and told me that I didn't have to yell at him. I of course said I didn't...and trust me that wasn't the end of it.
She goes back and tells the TEACHER. The teacher calls me in and asks me why I yelled at Alex and I was sitting there saying that I didn't and tried to explain to her about my voice and not hearing it...SHE CALLED ME ME A LIAR!
Then there is an another incident when we had a substitute. I didn't want to read because I had a bad day and wasn't in the mood. They tried forcing me to read and I got upset and went to the table to put my head down. One of my favorite aides and someone i considered my best friend, came in and I told him to follow me into the room next door. I sobbed to him and told him what happened when haruhi (same aide as before) told him not to talk to me because I was in 'timeout'. I felt like I was going to die at the point because I was sobbing so much.
Then there was another time when we were all playing a game but the teacher wasn't around. We started getting too loud and fighting a bit but not enough to get anyone's feelings hurt. The teacher came in scolding us about it and yada yada...well I went into a meltdown mode and had shutdown a bit. (I could still hear her talking) It was during our lunch and she SCREAMS at me to stop crying saying I DESERVED IT.
There were other times when i had short curly hair, because my hair is naturally curly. She would constantly harrass me about it and tell me to come out because she thought i wasn't. I kept telling her it's the way it is.
Well, my mom got fed up with all of it. She called the principal and TWO principals came to talk to her about it. Yes, TWO. After that she didn't want to mess with me.
But the harassment never stopped. I only had one aide I liked and he was my best friend. I would cry to him and everything and he was so understanding. I loved him to death. Everyone did. He was even my driver home too.
Anyway, it got to the point where the harassment didn't stop. So my mom calls the school and asks them how many credits I had to graduate. It turned out that I had just the amount that I needed and my mom worked things out with them so that I could stay home and not go to that life skills class but still graduate from school. :3
I love my mom. <3 She started getting supportive me because what mother wouldn't enjoy seeing their daughter go through hell, you know? ^_^
So yeah...those are some of the things I've come across with just teachers alone. Sorry it's so long. ^^;
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Diagnosed with an autistic disorder (Not AS but mild to moderate classic Autism), ADHD, Learning Disability, intellectual disability and severe anxiety (part of the autism); iPad user; written expressionist; emotionally-sensitive
Mom also told me they were jealous. I wonder if she truly thought that or if she was trying to make me feel better or both.
_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
iheartmegahitt
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Mom also told me they were jealous. I wonder if she truly thought that or if she was trying to make me feel better or both.
I actually kind of thought they were jealous too. XD Because I was the one that was showing "originality" and they were jealous of that...hehe.
_________________
Diagnosed with an autistic disorder (Not AS but mild to moderate classic Autism), ADHD, Learning Disability, intellectual disability and severe anxiety (part of the autism); iPad user; written expressionist; emotionally-sensitive
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