aspie women and boyfriends

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In regards to myself. I do not really make or have friends. I would guess I have one or two. My husband and I met because he shared one of my interests. When I think back on it, if it was not for the connection with the special interest and his persistance with dating we would not have met.

Obviously, if you are a social person, no matter if you are physically attractive or not, you will meet more people and therefore have better odds of finding a mate.

PS- It seems to me that people that are more average looking have better, longer lasting relationships because they are getting married to the person for who they are on the inside, not what they look like on the outside.

In my opinion, aspie women have an advantage over NT women in that they are often more intelligent, they think about things in more depth and therefore have a lot of interesting opinions ie they have interesting personalities. So while an NT female might seem outwardly more attractive in terms of what NT culture expects of them, on a one to one basis when talking to a man they are probably often quite boring. They don't tend to take an interest in the same subject matter as the average man while the aspie female is far more adaptable in terms of learning about new subjects, as a lot of us like learning new stuff. In this way I think aspie women are good at tailoring themselves to what the man wants in terms of interesting conversation. We talk to men as equals ie as an actual person, not just as a representative of the opposite gender as NT women seem to do, hence we can form a stronger bond as we are usually a good friend as well as a partner.

Also, you seem to be assuming that aspie women are having these relationships with NT men whereas I'd say a fair proportion of their partners will probably be neuro-diverse ie not NT.
They might be on the autistic spectrum or have ADHD, Dyslexia or Tourettes or Schizophrenia - any of the conditions that mean a person has non-standard brain wiring.

Another reason why there are so many unattached NT women is that they are often far too picky as regards what they want in a man - they often want a man to be rich and have a long list of requirements which few men could ever hope to meet - hence they remain alone whereas an aspie woman is more likely to take a man as he comes, without putting so much pressure on him to look and act a certain way. We have lower expectations in other words.

To elaberate off of what Callista said.

When I make friendships they're incredibly deep and incredibly strong. It's also unusual for that to happen. What happened in the case of my relationship was we were close friends, where he was interested in me, I was aware of this and was accepting of this, he didn't push me, and then we accidentally fell into a romantic relationship from our friendship.

My boyfriend would also probably be given 4 different diagnoses including an ASD if he went and had a complete neuropsych evaluation (ASD - stilted type, ADHD, SPD/CAPD, and depression). It's not like I'm an autistic person dating a steoretypical NT. He's a geek, nerd, and twice exceptional probably autistic person, like me (except that I've been diagnosed).

In my case - I'm a passive type autistic person, but one of the things I really enjoy is actually listening to other people talking about their special interests if they're things I find a little interesting. This has worked well for us.

You have no way to know about the statement "a good husband who wants to stay with you too".

Autistic females are very prone to being in abusive relationships.

I've not been abused in a romantic situation but in non-romantic situations, I've had someone emotionally abuse me once, and attempt to abuse me and fail because I managed to be so naive it failed another time.

My guess? (Complete guess, no evidence to back this up)

Autistic females who are in a relationship are more likely to mention being in one.
Autistic females who are not in a relationship are more likely to mention nothing.
Autistic males who are not in a relationship are more likely to mention not being in one.
Autistic males who are in a relationship are more likely to mention nothing.
Autistic genderqueer people are might go either way


Combine this with the fact that there's a 4:1 male:female diagnosis rate.

I feel a bit hurt after reading this. I am an aspie female with a NT housband. I have been maried for 10 years. I am loyal, great in bed, and I just say what I think and want so my housband does not have to gues all the time. Aspie ladies can be great partners IMO

alot of good answer here. So what Im getting at is. Alot of aspie ladies even though you don't have alot of friends. There is just something about you ladies that can get a man interest in you. Maybe alot of men just don't bother with alot of these succesful,good looking women because they think they have no chance and so they end talking to one of you ladies and find out that you ladies are not bad. But it's too bad we don't see alot of nt women doing the same thing. I think it sad that so many aspie men are never in relationship because so many women have a stigma against shy or social akward men.
and also sad that so many men would pass a succesful women because he assume she wouldn't like him. I sure there are alot of very great succesul women and aspie men out there that can make great partner or just a good friend.

it sad that so many women would rather date an abusive as*hole man than a nice aspie male
sad that so many men would rather date an lazy welfare queen than an smart, succesful female