Why Were You Bullied? (and my attempt to answer it)

Page 4 of 4 [ 55 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4

Unseen
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 26 Sep 2010
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 237
Location: Bulgaria

04 Jan 2013, 10:43 am

XFilesGeek wrote:
This one's easy to answer:

1. I am a girl who looks/acts like a boy.

2. I didn't talk much, and my voice tended to disappear when confronted by jerks.

3. I had/currently have weird body movements and an awkward gait.

That's pretty much it. Mostly, it's the violating gender norms thing that gets me the most flak.


You know, this reminds me of a girl from high school. She always spoke very quietly, liked doing "boy stuff", talked and did strange things, had a very intense interest in rap music and was very intelligent, but always socially awkward.

I was the only guy she ever spoke to - she avoided the others and they tended to avoid her. Being a weirdo myself, I tolerated her quirks and could relax around her. I've even heard people calling us "Frankenstein and his bride" at least once.

Back then I only thought her to be a weirdo... but after all the things I've learned, especially from people on this forum, I am starting to suspect that she might be on the spectrum.

I wonder...


_________________
"Are you alive? The simple answer might be, you are alive because you can ask that question."


hanyo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Sep 2011
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,302

04 Jan 2013, 10:45 am

I think it's because I was quiet and shy and just weird but I don't really know for sure.



ghoti
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2012
Age: 57
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,596

04 Jan 2013, 12:28 pm

rapidroy wrote:
I will say though that being picked last/ picked over always wasen't really bullying by the kids, they wanted to win sports/do good in group assignments(I did too). I was seen as a liabillity instaid of an asset almost always. heck I still can't walk right today and I was normally a low performer in group work unless I got to build something or was in my current personal intrest range. Those who can't perform up to par get left out. While it left me very sad/lonly/low self confidence and resentful I can't really put the blame on the kids, after all it was the same 2 or 3 getting picked first mostly. That was the fault of the school allowing such interpeer compitition to exist over and over.
In one class, the 2 students double and tripled checked to make sure everyone else was selected before one was "forced" to put me on their squad. Then the teacher only became involved after i then refused to play along with them punishing me in the process.



MissCAP
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2013
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 42
Location: USA

06 Jan 2013, 1:19 pm

I had buck teeth.
I was poor.
I was/am weird.
I had pants too short in the length.
I wore velcro jordache pink and purple shoes.
I was in the jurisdiction of a "rich" school and again, I was very poor.
I was/am super tall, since forever.
I was super skinny.
I was very, very shy.
I would freak out having to talk in front of the class.
I was/am too nice.
I was/am too tender.
I was/am a loner.
I had no friends.
I was always in my own little safe world.
I was too gullible.



KnarlyDUDE09
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Oct 2011
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 685
Location: Manchester, UK

06 Jan 2013, 2:10 pm

...my naivety, my kindness towards others, my so-called "nerdy-ness", my un-aged appearance, my uniqueness...

There are probably more reasons that I was never aware of, but that's all I can think of.


_________________
Aspie score: 160 of 200, neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 44 of 200
(01/11/2012)

YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNjuB4 ... WnSA552Xjg


Falloy
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 1 Dec 2011
Age: 57
Gender: Male
Posts: 355

07 Jan 2013, 6:27 am

My bullying didn't really start until secondary school but it started quickly and became quite bad. There were probably quite a few reasons:
- I was probably quite immature for my age, still more interested in childhood toys than in smoking and drinking and chasing girls.
- I was very tall for my age and very big built. I stood out in a crowd and people expected that I should be an extroverted tough guy but I wasn't. Because of my size I was put in the rugby team and if I weaselled my way out of this people ridiculed me but if I turned up for matches I was ridiculed for not being good at the sport.
- I was an only child and so not used to just squabbling and shrugging things off after a dispute was over.
- I was poor at (and had no interest in) sports
- I had red hair and wore glasses
-I wasn't physically attractive. My build meant that I couldn't wear the then fashionable clothes.
- My parents were working class and we lived in a wealthy area.
- I didn't fit very well into the expected "male" stereotype - although my interests weren't actually feminine, they were just introverted and "nerdy". I was also hugely confused about my sexuality. Other people wouldn't have known this but the issue sapped my already pitifully low confidence levels.



chlov
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 851
Location: My house

12 Jan 2013, 8:46 am

I've never been really bullied. The only "bullism" I received was teasing and exclusion/isolation, that I don't really consider bullying, since in my opinion only physical aggression can be considered bullying.